Jamie and Zoe watched as the Doctor argued with the official who had run up to the TARDIS practically the moment it landed. There had been something or other about the use of a non-standard translator which had set the small Time Lord off, and the Doctor and the being who was apparently from Customs and Immigration who'd Transmatted in practically the instant the TARDIS began to materialize were now having a rather loud "discussion".
"The TARDIS's translator is more than capable of doing its job!" the Doctor yelled at the customs official for the nth time since the "discussion" had started.
"Gallifreyan TT Capsule translators don't meet our legal standards to be considered such due to the fact that they creatively rephrase anything said in Gallifreyan. Your "translator" is even further off standard due to the rather unusual filter you have programmed into it that creatively alters all languages it translates. This translator is perfectly acceptable, and the language of your Tellurian companions can be programmed in in a matter of moments." the harassed looking official said as it once again held up a small device.
"Can't you just take it Doctor?" Zoe asked, having grown impatient with sitting back and watching the small Time Lord argue.
The Doctor turned to look at Zoe, and noted the almost pleading look Jamie who'd grown tired of listening to the Doctor argue was giving him.
"Fine." the Doctor sighed.
It became immediately apparent when the TARDIS translator had disengaged, seeing as neither Jamie nor Zoe could understand a single word that was being spoken, and the customs official's officious stance resolved itself into something that would be considered an officious stance for a member of its species. Apparently, the translator had been translating more than just the spoken word. As Jamie and Zoe stood there trying to process what they were seeing and hearing, the bureaucrat scuttled over to them and waved the device it had offered the Doctor over Zoe's head.
"Well, now that we've gotten this Pythian Blessed issue out of the way, can we please get going?" the Doctor asked.
"You may once all of the official paperwork has been sorted out." the customs official stated, looking almost gleeful at the dark expression that crossed the Doctor's face. The Doctor then suggested that the customs official do something very unnatural which involved three cats and a donkey to the paperwork.
The next hour revealed that either someone had pranked the translator, or the Doctor's language was actually a great deal more colorful than they had suspected. The Doctor seemed to fit in quite nicely at the dockside pub that they'd somehow found their way to, and his er, griping about the government was pretty well received by a number of the patrons. One patron was so moved by his commentary regarding the bureaucratic processes on the planet that he invited the Doctor to meet with the leader of its revolutionary faction.
"Tell your leader he can take a flying...er, what I meant to say was, I'm trying to have a drink in peace, so can you please leave?" the Doctor who now apparently actually had to think about what he was saying replied to this offer.
One thing led to another, and the next thing Jamie and Zoe knew, they and the Doctor were once again surrounded by the security forces of the planet they'd landed on. This time, rather than it being due to some situation they'd stumbled into, it had been because the Doctor had suggested that certain zoo animals were involved in the conception of a certain Captain of the Guard who'd been throwing his weight around a bit too much for the Doctor's tastes.
The Doctor had that expression he often had when he was about to say "Oh Dear".
"Well, fuck." he said.
