So that time of year is almost upon us again and like last year I bring you another festive piece.
This is the first of five parts. Each instalment posted every Saturday until Christmas day.
So without further adieu here it is…
He kept to himself more these days. Firmly believing in light of the person he'd allowed himself to become that he wasn't worthy of any kind of redemption. Much less the happiness with a woman he knew could never fully be his.
So his life now consisted of work and sleep. Using the former as a way to forget everything else, but his dreams were still filled with her. The dreams becoming incessant to the point where he longed for her, but much to his dismay she was unattainable. If not physically then certainly in the emotional sense and looking back on it now he couldn't blame her.
"I had her and I lost her."
He took some consolation in that fact. As short as the time was, what he did experience within those months was true, unrestrained happiness. The kind only love would bring and the one regret he had was allowing his insecurities to ruin it all.
All he could hold onto now was what could have been.
That knowledge, over the due course of time, slowly turning him bitter and resentful of everything and everyone around him.
She was thankful she had Aaron, but not a day had gone by when she wished he was here too, especially now.
She wanted to call him yet always hesitated when the time came. Firmly believing his mind was made up in regards to the things he said that night.
"You're not even related to him."
It cut through her like a knife. Piercing harder and deeper at the fact that it came from his mouth and though it was true, she didn't see it that way.
Aaron was a new beginning for her. A chance for redemption from a past she wasn't proud of or willing to revisit for that matter. It was the reason she never kept in touch with her Mother, but she didn't fret over it because she had everything she could want in this life now.
Freedom and a family. If only Jack could see her and Aaron as that and not question it instead.
"Mommy! Mommy look!" Aaron excitedly exclaimed, pulling Kate towards the sign stuck on a small shop window.
"Wanna get your hands on the most favoured toy of the year, the Feister Blaster? Come in and get yours while stocks last. Now 50% off the retail price."
"Mommy, can we please?" Aaron begged, making Kate sigh, especially when she saw the supposedly "half off" price. Still, she took note to appease him somewhat.
"I bet Santa's already got it for you sweetie." Kate explained, making Aaron question it with wide eyed sincerity.
"Really?"
"We'll have to wait till Christmas morning to find out, but I have a good feeling." She assured, earning a reply from Aaron in the form of an excited clap, followed by a squeal when Kate whisked him into her arms, cuddling him close into her.
It was moments like this that Kate treasured the most. As small as they were it encouraged her to believe that things may just be okay.
She just hoped that Jack was too.
It was Christmas Eve now and while the Hospital bustled with Christmas cheer in every way possible, Jack remained cooped up in his Office. Choosing to bury himself in his work rather than partake in any festivities. He even excluded himself from the Annual Christmas Potluck. Firmly believing it was nothing but a waste of time and money when instead it could be spent on medical equipment and office supplies.
His personal method of indulging in the festive spirit was the bottle. Seeing no reason why he shouldn't, he started with a bottle of Jack Daniel's, his Father's favourite, judging by the fact that he stunk of it on the nights he did come home.
Sitting by himself in the dark in his Office, he drank. Choosing to do so until he would no longer think or exist for that matter cause only then would the pain go away.
Knock, knock
He ignored it. So caught up in his own misery and slight drunkenness that he didn't even hear it. Not until the knocking struck again, this time harder and louder.
"Go away!" he groaned, only urging for the knocking to get even louder and it wasn't until Jack finally answered it that it seized.
No one. There wasn't a soul to be seen or heard in the Hospital corridor. Aggravated at this point for being fooled around with, he slammed the door behind him. Cursing the whole time but it came to a screeching halt when he turned around and saw that his office chair wasn't as vacant as he'd left it.
"Dad?"
Next Chapter: Jack experiences a blast from his past….
What do you think?
