Disclaimer: J. K. Rowling owns Harry Potter. Michael Jackson owns a lot of Beatles songs, "Maxwell's Silver Hammer" probably included. I own a computer that won't boot and a bunch of letters telling me how much I owe the state for my college education. You do the math.
Harry's Bright Green Hex
By Tîldëshsmôo
(to the tune of "Maxwell's Silver Hammer" by The Beatles)
Malfoy gets no
respect;
'Cause of Potter, his life was wrecked,
And that of
his dad.
So, he plots a bad and evil scheme:
He waits for his
foe to zoom
Past upon his new broom,
Then he'll hex
away.
Draco'll get his way; it's been his dream.
But, as
the boy was drawing his wand,
A shout came from behind.
"Avada,"
Harry's bright green hex
Crashed into his heart!
"Kedavra,"
Harry's bright green hex
Caused Draco to depart.
Back in
class once more,
Snape says he works for Dumbledore,
But Harry
thinks he knows best.
(Plus, there was a test, and his house had
failed.)
Most of the kids are bored,
But he knows Sev's with
the Dark Lord,
So he waits behind.
Using Body Bind, prof was
neatly baled.
And, as he stared with those grassy eyes,
Potter
cast his spell:
"Avada," Harry's bright green
hex
Slammed into his head!
"Kedavra," Harry's bright
green hex
Ensured that he was dead.
Again, at the
Ministry,
At four PM (that's time for tea!)
Harry sits
alone,
Painting testimonial pictures, oh.
Ron and Hermione,
screaming from behinda me,
Say he must go free ("Harry must go
free!").
Fudge does not agree, and he tells them so.
But, as
the words are leaving his lips,
A spell comes from
below:
"Avada," Harry's bright green hex
Struck Fudge
in the ass!
"Kedavra," Harry's bright green hex
Brought
Corny's fears to pass!
Bri-ight green hex!
I know, Harry probably wouldn't do this, nor could he get away with having his wand on him while in the witness chair at the Ministry. It's a humorous filk, not a serious fic, and I don't care if I screw with canon a little to make it funnier. Come on, you've got to admit it's an amusing way for that ass to die!
