Disclaimer: J. K. Rowling owns Harry Potter. Michael Jackson owns a lot of Beatles songs, "Maxwell's Silver Hammer" probably included. I own a computer that won't boot and a bunch of letters telling me how much I owe the state for my college education. You do the math.


Harry's Bright Green Hex
By Tîldëshsmôo
(to the tune of "Maxwell's Silver Hammer" by The Beatles)

Malfoy gets no respect;
'Cause of Potter, his life was wrecked,
And that of his dad.
So, he plots a bad and evil scheme:
He waits for his foe to zoom
Past upon his new broom,
Then he'll hex away.
Draco'll get his way; it's been his dream.
But, as the boy was drawing his wand,
A shout came from behind.

"Avada," Harry's bright green hex
Crashed into his heart!
"Kedavra," Harry's bright green hex
Caused Draco to depart.

Back in class once more,
Snape says he works for Dumbledore,
But Harry thinks he knows best.
(Plus, there was a test, and his house had failed.)
Most of the kids are bored,
But he knows Sev's with the Dark Lord,
So he waits behind.
Using Body Bind, prof was neatly baled.
And, as he stared with those grassy eyes,
Potter cast his spell:

"Avada," Harry's bright green hex
Slammed into his head!
"Kedavra," Harry's bright green hex
Ensured that he was dead.

Again, at the Ministry,
At four PM (that's time for tea!)
Harry sits alone,
Painting testimonial pictures, oh.
Ron and Hermione, screaming from behinda me,
Say he must go free ("Harry must go free!").
Fudge does not agree, and he tells them so.
But, as the words are leaving his lips,
A spell comes from below:

"Avada," Harry's bright green hex
Struck Fudge in the ass!
"Kedavra," Harry's bright green hex
Brought Corny's fears to pass!

Bri-ight green hex!


I know, Harry probably wouldn't do this, nor could he get away with having his wand on him while in the witness chair at the Ministry. It's a humorous filk, not a serious fic, and I don't care if I screw with canon a little to make it funnier. Come on, you've got to admit it's an amusing way for that ass to die!