WARNING: disturbing scenes of baby death. Read at own will. Not too graphic.

Disclaimer: Well it isn't mine and you will find out why soon haha xP


"You don't know me, Jane." Lisbon was sat on her couch, feet curled up under her, half bottle of expensive whiskey at her side. God knows how many she has had now. All alone, like usual. She normally wasn't a big fan of drinking, as you can imagine, but just this once she has succumbed to the woody amber liquid.

Empty glass in hand Lisbon sat up, or rather swayed, she slammed her tumbler on the coffee table, making a resounding thud go through the room. She was tired, maybe just that bit agitated as well. This all stemming from earlier in the day, how dare he say that to her (I know you better then you know yourself). Like hell he did. Hand shaking, she reached for the bottle, uncapped it again for the umpteenth time. Lining up the glass and bottle, she just managed to keep the liquid in the glass, only a few droplets sloshed onto the table.

The reason she hated drink, other than her father of course. Bastard that he was, selfish to match. Well it was the other part of her life that she didn't dwell on, the part no one knew about; she even managed to erase it from her file. Now that was tricky, but doable.

Family, funny word really isn't it? Loyal to a fault, always there. Not in her experience. Family was just another word like; carpet or shit. Well she tried with her brothers, kept them from the beatings that in the end she could never run from, the protector. Shaking her head Lisbon sipped her drink. Always the one in control, always responsible, always blamed. Then she found her saviour. Her knight in shining armour, on that white horse.

Being catapulted into a whirlwind romance, that only came from the fairest of fairy tales; she left just like that with prince in tow and three little boys, left her alcoholic father behind, for a real family a happy family, god that word makes her sick. Taking another gulp, maybe that will help, she thinks.

Happiness only lasted about three years of what she can remember. Teresa, Jamie and her three little brothers, you see what people didn't know, was that she did have a baby once upon a time, a beautiful bouncing little boy. Nathan. She wishes she had never spent so much time at the academy, but more time with her little monkey. A lone tear ran down her cheek as she refilled her glass again.

She loved her then husband so much, they got married as soon as they found out about the baby, quick ceremony, and not even her brothers were there. But she was so happy, fulfilled, passed out with flying colours in the academy, "On her way to the top, that one." Were the words said by her professors. Everything was on the up, at last. Until that goddamned call!


"Reese, you have to get back here as quick as possible!" Tommy said urgently through the phone a slight panic about it.

"Tommy what's the matter? Is everything okay? Is Nathan alright?" Teresa sat up straight in her chair, pen slipping from her hand as she abandoned the report that she was filling out.

"I can't talk long Reese, he is here now, Jamie and him are fighting…" Teresa quickly cut him off.

"Fighting with who tommy?... Tommy! Are you there?" Teresa stood up, made sure her gun was in place, picked up her jacket then ran out of the precinct. The last thing she heard was her boss shouting after her.

"Dad, Reese. He is here..." just then the line went dead. Her stomach dropped. Bile reaching her throat feeling like it was choking her. He had found them.

Jumping into her personal car, speeding the 20 minutes home, she came to a screeching halt outside her home in a record 10 minutes later. Dread that's all she can remember when she climbed out of her car, looking up at the house and seeing her farther, or better yet that sorry excuse for a man on her porch. Sitting in the rocking chair, blood over his face, and also on what she could see of his hands. His hands, they were holding something a sheet? A blanket? Oh god. It was Nathan's, he couldn't sleep without it. Her legs feeling like jelly, heart pumping. Before she knew it she was running the short distance between them. Father and daughter.

He had a gun in his hands, an evil smile on his face. Her baby wasn't moving, he looked asleep, peaceful. But she knew better then to antagonize, hostage 101; keep calm. From the amount of blood on the door and no movement from inside the house she was sure the others were knocked out cold or worse… NO. She couldn't think like that. Breath. Keep calm.

"What have you done?" Teresa's voice croaked with the effort to stay calm and not rush him for her baby.

"He's sleeping Teresa, a nice long nap. The others are sleeping too." John Lisbon looked up at his daughter. Dark and withdrawn.

"Why?" She couldn't believe it. No, everything was fine this morning.

"Well, I was here to see you actually. But then that man of yours told me to piss off and never come back, so disrespectful. Anyways I taught him a lesson as well as the other three, getting too big for their boots Reese, you wanna sort that out, oh actually don't worry, I already did." He gave a chuckle then waved his gun a little. Indicating exactly what he had done to punish them.

"Don't call me that, You bastard! Why couldn't you just leave us alone! Why couldn't you have just drank yourself to death!" Teresa wasn't calm, not one cell in her body as calm. She wanted to kill him!

"Ha, leave you alone, I think I have just accomplished that my darling daughter. How does it feel huh? To have everything, taken away from you? Everything you love, just gone like fairy dust." He stood up. Walked slowly towards her, looking down and cooing at her baby, she felt a slight glimmer of hope, and then he spoke again. "He really was a beautiful little tyke. Shame really. But hey, it had to be done. Just to drive the point home." He stopped in front of her and handed her, her dead baby boy, her little monkey.

He pushed passed her, and started walking away. How can he just hand me my lifeless baby, then walk away? Not on my damn watch. She cradled her baby, whispered an "I will love you forever." Then kissed his cold fore head. Laying him down on the rocking chair, she said "I'll be back in a minute, monkey." She stifled a sob. Then got to her feet, holding her head up high, she tugged her gun out of the holder. Taking the safety of she turned around. Stalking towards her murdering son of a bitch father, she wanted to look him in the eye.

"Hey! Don't walk away from me. I think you're forgetting something." Teresa had made it down the steps and was a little more than about six feet from her farther.

"And what would that be?" He turned to face her, only to see the barrel of a gun. He stumbled back slightly. Caught off guard.

"I up hold the law now. You have just committed a serious crime. That means I can shoot you in between the eyes and get off with little more than a suspension at worst, although considering the circumstances probably a whole load of therapy too. But hey, small sacrifices." With that said she pulled the trigger, felt the satisfying vibrations going through her body. She heard the impact the bullet had on his skull. Then he dropped with surprising force onto the pathway up to her home.

Running back up the stairs, she gently picked up her son. Cradling him, sitting on the rocking chair, she refused to go into the house but by the time she sat down, all kinds of sirens could be heard. She felt a warm hand on her shoulder but refused to look up she just kept whispering to Nathan. "Come on, please just breath, please breath for mommy."


Lisbon startled awake, her head thumping, looked over at the coffee table to see a smashed glass and an empty bottle of whiskey. She deducted she had passed out.

She hears a knocking at her door. What the… Then she looks over at the clock. 10.00 AM. Hmm, just a little late for work then, she thinks. Still more then drunk enough of two people, Lisbon drags her but of the couch, and towards the offending noise of the persistent knocker. She wrenches the door open, only to reveal a concerned looking Jane, the worried expression on his face worsening as he gets a look at her.

"Lisbon? Are you alright?" He pushes forward into her living room, giving her a once over. Red rimmed eyes, blood shot, pale and clammy, her hair is a mess, clothes look like she has been in them for days, and she also smells like a distillery.

"Whada' you think?" She slurs out bitterly. "Seein' as you know me s'well."


A/N: So there is my first chapter of this angst fest, but not to fear! This WILL have a HAPPY ending. I assure you.

Thank you for all reading. Update should be soon! Hang on to your hats kids. xD