Author's Note: One-shot fiction based on the X-Men we know from the movies. I wrote this in one go, couldn't stop before I'd finished it. The nameless mutant is one of my own creations. All other mutants mentioned are the property of Marvel Comics. I can't tell too much about it, you just have to experience it. Hope you like it!

*****

From afar

I watched you on the day of the Three Mile Island incident. I stood on the balcony of my hotel room, crying for the first time in months, when I saw a red streak pierce the air just above the trees. It turned in circles, sputtering on and off, like a laser beam. I saw flashing lights, heard sirenes screech and watched a helicopter take off after one of the power plants' towers had crumbled to the ground. I remember wondering what had happened, when the actual residents of the room opened the door. I'd forgotten to turn the lights off, so they saw... something. The woman screamed at the top of her lungs, the man pushed her aside and ran towards me. I jumped.

*****

I watched you on the night I almost died. The city was attacked by a group called the Brotherhood of Mutants, led by a man who called himself Magneto. I'd fled to a rooftop after taking an overdose of morphine, hoping to make the pain stop. The excruciating pain of tendons ripping free from bones, mucles being torn and rebuild, organs destroying and rebuilding themselves. My skin was cracked, blood oozing from numerous laesions. Both my hair and my nails had fallen off. I was put in a hospital by my friends, who didn't understand what was going on. Neither did the doctors. They just pumped me full of medicines, assuring me every time I was going to be okay. At the same night I chose to get away from it all, death being a real option for the first time in my life, I watched your fight against evil, trying to save us from dying.

I touched hands with Death that day. I could literally feel him in veins, penetrating me with every breath I took. Then I saw a building crumble, heard the screams of those in need... And I decided it was enough. I wouldn't fight it anymore, I would let myself be what my body was trying to become for almost three years. I wanted to help others, no matter the cost. To say it hurt like Hell would be a gross understatement. If I hadn't already tried to kill myself with morphine, I think I would still have died from the pain alone. Every fibre of my being was changed. Even I changed.

The next day showed me part of the city in ruins. I'd been out for a few hours while my body completed the long-awaited metamorphosis. It felt great. It felt horrible. I realized I could never go back to being who I was before, not ever. I was one of them now. A freak. I'd never see my friends or my family again. But I was okay with that. I'd chosen this way. Already I was flexing my new mucles, feeling my new skin, relishing in the sensations that my new senses fed me. I vowed to help wherever I could, following your example. Easy to promise. Hard to keep.

*****

I watched you on the evening the whole world changed. Or at least, it was the beginning of the change. You fought at the Statue of Liberty when I was busy packing my things from the vacant apartment I'd been living in for some time. A bright, blue light started to shine from the statue, expanding at an alarming rate. My... mutation had worsened. Or increased? I'm still not sure what word would be adequate to describe it. My mucles had grown. My whole body was bigger. My skin was almost impenetrable to most bullets and knives, as I had found out in the previous years. And three strange little bumps, two beneath my arms and one at the base of my spine, had finally matured. I was still confused about using these extra appendages, but I was getting there.

That evening heralded the beginning of a new era. I can't say if that was a good thing or a bad thing, it just WAS. Mutants were here to stay and no amount of ignoring this was gonna change that. Suddenly the world had mutants that tried to look out for both humans and mutants alike, fighting 'the good fight'. Some of the normal humans were pleasantly surprised by this. Others thought it was all part of a big, mutant conspiracy. I couldn't care less, as long as I was allowed to do what I wanted. And right now that was to find a way to get aboard a plane unseen, to follow a child molester to another country. For someone such as me that posed a serious problem, but not one I couldn't overcome. So I left without saying goodbye. I knew I would be back.

*****

I watched you the day the president changed his heart about mutants. Life had been rough on me. I'd encountered various mutants with much better fighting skill than me and even though my strength had increased over the years, I was no match for a cunning fighter with years of experience. I'd suffered. I'd even lost one of my new arms. But, like the reptile I resemble, it grew back. Slowly and painfully. I was at a loss about what to do. For a long time I had convinced myself I didn't need anyone, that I could make it on my own. I was wrong. My heart ached for another being to talk to, to feel appreciated for who I was, not what I am. Or what I'm not.

I cried for the first time since the Three Mile Island incident. It hurt. My eyes weren't really equipped for that sort of thing anymore. My forked tongue tasted blood when I brought one of my tears to my mouth. I was tired. I was alone. I couldn't take it anymore. But would I dare? Would I dare to intrude on your lives, dare to introduce myself and ask for your help? I didn't know. Until you reached out and touched my mind.

Suddenly your voice filled my head. You asked if I needed help, because you felt I was hurting. You couldn't help it, but I was scared out of my mind by what you could do. I screamed into the night, slamming shut every door I could think of to keep you out. You disappeared, leaving a faint echo of shock and... sympathy. Sympathy? For a freak like me? I didn't understand. One of the doors opened and you came outside. I heard you ask to look for me, but not hurt me. That I was fragile. Fragile? I can't die, I can only HURT! That last thought was so loud, you looked right at me, as if your eyes could pierce the darkness. The others converged on my position. Again I screamed my defiance into the night and sped away as fast as I could. You didn't follow me.

*****

I watched you on Alcatraz Island at the night of your last stand. Or at least, I think it was you. Maybe you weren't even there. But your presence was, I just know it. I'd seen the riots in the days before, brought on by a mutant who could 'cure' mutants. They'd started after the angel fled his father's building by diving through the window and soaring through the air above the waiting crowd. I was tempted, oh yes. My looks hadn't improved with the years, but my powers had. I'd grown stronger, learned to fight and I'd gotten back at every one of those bastards that almost killed me. Or at least tried to kill me. It wasn't that I didn't WANT to be normal again. I was afraid of the pain it might cause when my body would change back.

I saw the bridge being lifted, taking Magneto and his brotherhood to the island where the boy was being held. I didn't help. I couldn't. I was afraid. Afraid of YOU. Afraid of your sympathy, of you breaking through my armor and finding the real me. I couldn't bear that thought. So I turned my back on you. I'm not proud of it, but I did it anyway. I vowed to never watch you again. Until the news hit the next morning.

The number of civilian casualties was atrociously high. Magneto hadn't given a damn about the innocent people who got caught up in HIS fight. Every personnel member of the facility had been 'wiped from existence' by a woman with flaming red hair. No one knew who had stopped her or how, but it was clear the world had teetered on the brink of a global disaster. You had to have been there, I just know it! So I decided, for the second time in my life, that enough was enough. I'd visit you and ask you the one question I'd never dared ask in all my life. And I would be safe.