I set up the camera and check the lighting, I do this about 10 times before I'm satisfied. I press record and step in front of the camera.

"What up everyone!? It's your girl Ellie coming to you live from New York! Haha not really, I just wanted to sound like a news reporter for a second. How did I do?!

–wink-

So have any of you ever thought of the most randomest things when you're trying to sleep...?"


2 hours later

It's 2:20am and I'm so exhausted, but I'm going to edit this video and set it to upload in the morning. I've been so tired and worn out for days now but I'm doing what makes me happy so I can't exactly complain. I have a career that I absolutely love, with this job comes a lot of hate but the good definitely outweighs the bad!

I have a wonderful boyfriend, it's still so weird to even call him that. After a year you would think I would be used to it, but he's just Jake to me. Yes my absolutely stunning boyfriend Jake but the way I see it, he's my best friend. He trusts me with his secret and I trust him with my everything.

I still remember the first time he told me. We got into a huge fight because he wouldn't let me see him or even talk to him, so one day I drove to La Push and went to his house. Of course Billy said he wasn't there but I saw him out the corner of my eye in the backyard.

I thanked Billy and pretended to walk to my old beat up Chevy. When he closed the front door I walked to the back of the house where I saw Jacob. He was sitting in the backyard with Sam and a few other boys at the time I didn't know their names but I now know it was Jared, Paul, Embry and Quil.

That's the first time I saw Jacob with his long hair gone. He kept saying he was sick but he looked perfectly healthy, and super built. I froze as I stood there and saw all 6 guys in cut off shorts, short hair, and no shirt and just built like a body builder or wrestler. Paul could definitely be in the WWE.

After that I pressed and pressed to get him to tell me what was going on and why he had changed his image so much. Paul said a smart remark about the Cullen's calling them "bloodsuckers". I froze at his comment and horror, pain and other emotions I don't even have names to hit me like a ton of bricks. They ended up taking me to Emily's to calm me down, I guess I was hyperventilating and crying.

I didn't even notice. It was like I wasn't in control of my body, my body was crying and hardly breathing but my mind was so clear, my mind was focused on one person and one person only, Edward.

I had pushed him so far out my mind I kept him under lock and key, but that one little comment made the lock break and made everything come out and flood my mind and emotions, so I spilled everything I knew about them.

When I told them they sparkle in the sunlight Paul of course had something to say about that,

"Pfttt. Seriously!? No bursting into flames and the whole AHHH IM MELTINGG?" He said dramatically.

"You're an idiot, they're vampires not witches. This isn't no Wizard of Oz." I snapped at him.

"There's no place like home, there's no place like home." Paul said while hitting his heels together.

And that's how my friendship with the pack started!

I told them every single thing I knew about the Cullen's, which obviously wasn't much compared to what they already knew. Jared accidently said something about being wolves, which deserved him a wack on the back of his head by Sam, but after it was already out his mouth he couldn't exactly take it back so they told me about them.

And I of course promised to take it to my grave. Then I started hanging with Jacob and the pack more and more and I learned very quickly you need tough skin around those dudes, they are ruthless! Somedays it would just be me and Jacob chilling, we would watch movies, go out to eat and even walk around La Push.

Everyone assumed we were already dating and I would never really deny it because the longer I spent with Jake the happier I became. He warmed up my cold heart and filled the emptiness in it, I would enjoy every minute of his company. Till one day we were going out to dinner like we would always do, but this day was different.

Emily helped dress me, I thought I was super overdressed for just a dinner with my friend, little did I know what would happen. She had me in an Eyelash Lace Sheath dress in the color "TEA ROSE". I call it beige but every time I would say that Emily almost always bites my head off, correcting me "its tea rose!"

Jacob picked me up in his 1986 Volkswagen Rabbit which he spray painted matte black so now it looks 100 times better, mostly because it was my idea to spray paint it that color.

When he came out the car he made me do a double take and by the look of it he did one too when he saw me. Emily had also curled my hair in tight ringlets around my round face and put all the makeup in her makeup bag on my face. Okay I'm being slightly dramatic not all her makeup but it did sure feel like a lot. It was more than I would ever put on myself, but when I looked in the mirror I did feel stunning so I let it slide. That's the night Jacob asked me to be his girlfriend officially and I of course said yes. I may have said it too eagerly because he chuckled when I said "Yes of course!" My whole face flushed red from the answer I gave him and because he just asked me to be his girl.

I flush just thinking back to that time, now he's in the bedroom of our two bedroom town house apartment in La Push, snoring away like his life depended on it. That's why I'm so thankful my office area is in the basement. We have a fully finished basement with a working bathroom and a mini bar for Jake and his friends, I drink only occasionally.

I get to editing my video, I title it: What I think about before falling asleep.

I upload it to YouTube but I didn't post it yet, I set it to go live in the morning at 8am. After that I open up my emails and start answering them one by one, my eyelids are slowly lowering and I start falling asleep at my desk, my head falls forward and with a slight jolt I wake up and look at the time, 4:15am my clock reads.

I shut off my computer and make my way upstairs to the bedroom, as I get closer I can hear Jacob snoring, I giggle to myself because I'm so helplessly in love with this man. I crawl into bed and he immediately turns over and pulls me close, at that I drift into a much needed deep sleep.