Author's note: This my first attempt of this sort. I see a lot of the DW fanfic is on the new stuff. Even when I looked at the Fifth Doctor Community, I didn't see much with Peri. And of course my favorite Fifth Doctor Episode, and quite possibly favorite episode ever is the Caves of Androzani. This is a what if/alternate plot twist try.
Peri was fed up with it. Nobody was being square with anybody else. Everyone was at each other's throats, and it seemed as though not a soul on this god forsaken planet could claim an ounce of innocence in the matter. In fact, everyone seemed stark raving mad as far as she could tell. Jek just did more of the same to a greater or lesser degree, adding only a stroke of histrionic panache and a dash of obsessive genius to the already fatal mix. The doctor, oh she couldn't understand what it was that drove the doctor to play back right into Jek's hands, fenced with cutting tongue and cheek repartee instead of trying to sound Jek out and see if there weren't something that could be done about their predicament. Honestly, sometimes the Doctor couldn't manage practical—particularly when it came to strategically dire moments. "Nearly perfect?"… "Entirely perfect?" What did it matter anyway—just two egg-heads battling egos for all she cared. The pressing reality was they were stuck in the intestines of a war torn rock with a bunch of crazies and headed speedily towards a…
For God's sake, if Salateen wasn't joking—and she had a horrible leaden weight in her stomach telling her he wasn't—then they were both dying. Spectrox Toxemia. Not exactly how she had imagined her final hour, even taking her travelling company into consideration. Final stages he said would be a slow paralysis and TDP. She shuddered at the thought and tried not to reach her hand down to touch the open sores bursting from the rash on her leg. He'd said the only cure was miles beneath them in the bowels of an actively volcanic mud amusement park full of man-eating creatures and hibernating people-sized bats. Oh, and no oxygen.
The doctor did not seem to have things under control, nor had his tactics proved of much use. In fact, the only reason they were alive now was because of Jek. But then Jek had other ideas for the two of them. Still, really, first things first…
Peri thought to test out a different strategy before the cramps in her legs got any worse.
Now Jek didn't exactly make her feel particularly at home—his overfriendliness, if she could call it that, gave her the shakes outright—but as far as she could tell he was the only one who'd lifted a hand to help them since they'd arrived. Not saying much, but he did save them from a heartless and undeserved execution. I mean he'd saved them for his own purposes, but there was hope, wasn't there? The other crucial detail was that he also had programmable androids that could function without oxygen. It seemed rather obvious if anyone could aid them in their quest to the cure, that is harvesting milk from a queen bat, then the sole contender for this role would be Jek. If they could just persuade him to send a android down to the deeps or wherever Salateen said the bats were, then they could worry about getting back to the Tardis once they weren't on death's short list.
And while the doctor liked to think he was being open with the natives, nothing could be further from the truth. Naturally, he had his reasons being what he was…nevertheless…this was the second time in as many hours that the two were facing nearly certain death. What if a little good old fashioned forthright explication might not serve them better where reticence had already consistently failed? And now this project to hijack the guard android—why not save the trick for when they'd actually taken a moment to formulate a plan instead of waltzing out there with that shady snoop of a man Salateen, straight into a warzone cutting through mudburst central at high tide.
Her words echoed back to her from what seemed days ago, "Is this wise, I ask myself?" as she sighed and dug her thumb and forefinger into the sudden cramp in her thigh.
The doctor opened the door to peek out at the android standing on guard, quickly shutting the door at the click of firearm.
Peri had to stop this charade from continuing.
"Doctor," biting her tongue at the pain in her leg, she wrenched over and pulled him by his arm to the corner behind the consuls, hoping to clear Salateen's earshot.
"Are you sure this is a good idea. I don't trust him."
"And you think Jek is a better wager?" he responded in a whispered huff.
"Look, you go out there and even if the android doesn't kill you, you've got no idea where you're going or what else out there wants to kill you."
"And if we stay here much longer, we die—you heard the man. I think he's trustworthy enough to take on that."
Peri sighed and rolled her eyes between cramp spasms.
"Doctor, we'll need Jek's androids to get to the bat's milk, why don't we hold off on this experiment until Jek gets back. Maybe we can persuade him to help us…he wants us alive after all."
"He wants you alive, Peri. He's not particularly interested in me. Don't you recall?"
"Doctor, that's only because you two were arguing like that. Please, Doctor, I have a horrible feeling about you going out that door right now."
"Peri, you forget, once Jek gets back, there'll be no guarantee we get to try this little experiment at some later point. Do you really want to find out if he's serious when he means forever?"
Peri closed her eyes, lids doused in tried patience, face the epitome of weary concern.
"No, I don't want to find out, but Doctor, listen to me. If he goes out on business once, he's likely to do it again. Do you want to risk not finding the cure?"
"Given the choice between death and eternity, I know what I'd choose…" The Doctor mocked darkly.
Peri wanted to strangle him for his intransigence; nevertheless, she was grateful he somehow always managed to keep his sense of humor. Ah and this was the man who almost got me executed in a red cloth just under an hour ago…
