Hey my name is Macy I'm xxCharmspeakerxx's friend and since she doesn't use this site anymore she's allowed me to use it so drop a review and I hope you like my story that I've written. I don't own any characters in the story by the way. Love you!
It's been three months since Sherlock decided to jump off a building making John watch him as he did so. It's been three months since John discovered the true meaning of heart break. It's been three months since John was diagnosed with depression but he was never suicidal. It's also been three months since John has given up everything that he's ever lived for. John was not in the best state to see people anymore; the only person he truly saw and listened to was Mrs Hudson but even when she spoke it was still a blur to him and all that he could hear was murmurs whispering to each other and to him.
John now spends his time just lying on the couch reading the paper, circling the stories that Sherlock would've liked to investigate. When John wasn't lying on his couch, he was either making a cup of coffee, having a half an hour shower or visiting Sherlock's grave. That was the one thing John was proud of since his best friend died, he visited his grave every single day since the day of his death. John would give Sherlock flowers some days, other days he would just sit there and just talk about the people who are trying to help him, his pitiful live and the fact that he swears that every story in the paper is about suicide and that the stories are telling him to take on the challenge he never wants to do.
Mycroft used to visit John but he only wanted to find out his brother's plans and what he was capable of in his spare time. John was too upset to actually listen to Mycroft and couldn't be bothered turning his body around to look at his face. When John decided that he was going to listen to his best friend's brother, Mycroft offered him money to tell him everything John knows about his brother. Of course, John wasn't interested and by telling Mycroft that he wasn't interested, John threw a vase at Mycroft, purposely missing his head point blank. Ever since then Mycroft hasn't been bothered to visit John again.
Mrs Hudson has been making sure that John has been taking his medication when he's supposed to be, eating which is a major fail because every time she cooks a meal, John just gives it out to the cats in the alley way, drinks plenty of water which John just pours down the sink and gets enough sleep where that is not a fail since all John really does is sleep. Each night, Mrs Hudson would pray to Sherlock's angel to help John but she knew that Sherlock wasn't listening to her prayers. All Mrs Hudson wanted was for John to be safe.
Another three months has past and John was going to work again. He hasn't really done anything he's just received a call saying that he has a job at the local market, nothing special or anything like that. John would leave his flat at seven in the morning and take a taxi to his work then spend twelve hours being nice to costumers and pretending to be happy even though his heart is just getting worse and worse. After two weeks, John quit.
Mycroft hasn't visited once since the vase accident happened and John was so pleased that he never showed his face again. Mycroft was keeping an eye on John by placing cameras when he was asleep which was all day every day. Mycroft has been tempted to go back go back to John's house and offer him money again, but he knew that it wouldn't work again after two tries.
Mrs Hudson offered John a job managing the flat and keeping everything clean but of course, John declined but he didn't know that Mrs Hudson slips about a hundred pounds in random places in the flat which causes John to think that Sherlock hid money away from him which just made John feel even more depressed.
One night, John was all alone. Mrs Hudson was out at her granddaughter's birthday party, Mycroft was watching John from afar and Sherlock was still six feet underground. John reached under his bed and took out a rectangular grey metal box. John slowly opened and took out a photo graph of two people he's lived with. Mycroft suppressed a devilish smile and made his way to John's flat. The first thing that Mycroft thought when he was the photo was: Blackmail.
John held the photo in his hand, letting a tear drop onto Sherlock's face. It was a very special photo of Sherlock and himself. The photo was too special for John, he should've burnt it or gave it to Sherlock when he had the chance and by giving it to Sherlock he means putting the picture in his coffin.
Tears fell from John's eyes for the first time in a very long time. He didn't cry at Sherlock's funeral, he didn't cry after Sherlock's funeral, he didn't cry every time he visited Sherlock's grave and he didn't cry when he saw Sherlock's body falling down from the building. But today was the breaking point. It's been nine months since Sherlock took his life and that's nine months too long for John to handle. It's been nine months since John couldn't do anything and nine months since he's wanted to move on with his life. John held the picture close to his chest as he cried his eyes out. Tears kept falling down face and there was nothing that he could do to stop it. He held his knees close to his chest and rocked back and forwards just crying. Why couldn't he stop crying? Why couldn't he keep on going pretending that the emotions inside weren't trying to release themselves and break free into this pitiful world?
John lost track of time since he couldn't stop crying. How long has it been? Twenty minutes? Fifty minutes maybe, let's just say a very long time. John wished that someone was with him right now, he wished that Mrs Hudson was with him talking about all the great memories they've had together, he wished that Mrs Hudson was distracting him from his own mind, he wished that Sherlock was with him, holding him close and tight like John was his life line. In all honesty, he wouldn't mind if Mycroft was beside him right now which is a first and the last time he'll ever think that. All he really wanted was his Sherlock Holmes to be beside him right now but that'll never happen, not in a billion years.
"John . . .?"
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