DISCLAIMER: I do not own Twilight, just the plot for this story
AUTHORS NOTE: I will be switching points of view in the story. Not in this chapter, but in the near future
Bella's point of view
I turned and looked out the window of my room. It was early morning, and the sun hadn't come up yet. I sighed and rolled over onto my stomach putting my face into the pillows. I tool a deep breath and closed my eyes, relaxing a little but more with each breath. I just started to fall back into sleep, when I heard my door open. I ignored it hoping I would be able to get a little more sleep.
Next to me, I felt the bed move down a little, as someone sat on the edge. I moaned inwardly and heaved another sigh. From next to me, I heard a gently chuckle, followed by a light pressure on my back.
"Bella, my dear, its time to wake up"
His voice was just as sot and alluring as ever, and I couldn't help but to comply to his request. I rolled over and looked up toward the sound of his voice, my eyes adjusting to the dark. I felt his weight lift from the side of the bed, and in the same instanthe was at my side, laying next to me with his hand over my waist and his voice at my ear.
"Good morning my love"
I could hear the smile in his voice. I smiled and relaxed into his embrace. I sighed happily and replied with a matching smiled in my tone.
"Good morning"
I sounded giddy, but I couldn't help it. Whenever I was around him, I couldn't help but to be happy. I heard him slightly chuckle behind me again, and his hands moved to my stomach, letting them lightly sit there, while his voice rang soft in my ear.
"You know you can't have this baby in a hospital right? Carlisle will have to deliver it"
I sighed and turned around to face him, placing my head against his chest, closing my eyes. I felt him wrap his arms around me and heard his normally velvety tone tainted with concern.
"Bella, whats wrong?"
I sighed and shook my head in defeat. "You always see through me anymore.."
"Bella," He took my shoulders and and held me at arms length, the pale light of the sunds first rays, ulluminating his face in the darkened room. I saw his eyebrows knitted together, and it un-nerved me. What had lifted his other wise calm demeaner? Had I done something wrong? If so, what did I do? My thoughts were interupted when his voice broke through them, strained to a calm tone once more. His eyes drove into mine, mesmerizing me once again into staring relentlessly at him, my heart stopping yet again.
"Bella... whats wrong? You haven't been talking to me at all lately.. ever since you found out about... the... baby..." His voice trailed off and his eues widened after he mentioned the baby.
I bit my lip and pulled out of his arms, running from the room, into the bathroom across the hall. I fell to the ground on my knees, crying, trying to retain my emotions so I could face Edward once again. It's not that I don't want the baby, but I can't even see my father anymore after I have it. I won't even see anyone anymore! I'll be a vampire... am I ready?
I stood and looked at my tear stained reflection in the bathroom mirror, completely discusted with my behavior. I hurt him. I can't believe that I hurt him. That look in his eyes... I haven't seen that look since he found me in the ballet studio after my run in with James. I shook my head to clear my mind and wiped away the tear trails, but more kept surfacing. I broke down again and fell to me knees. I put my face in my hands and couldn't stop crying.
Through all of my tears, I felt a hand on my shoulder and a soft voice in my ear.
"Bella, please stop crying"
Edwards voice was pleading, and tainted with regret. I wanted so much to tell him that it wasnt the baby that had me upset, that it was my not being ready to leave my family behind, but I couldn't muster the courage to say it. Either way, I would only hurt him more, and I couldn't bear to think about that.
He rubbed his hand on my shoulder, trying to comfort me. He had given up on trying to talk to me, and was content with sitting next to me on the bathroom floor. I wiped tears from my face and leaned into his chest, wrapping my arms around him for comfort. He slowly wrapped his arms around me and swayed back and forth with me, whispering comoforting things in me ear.
After what seemed like ages to me, I was finally able to comtrol myself so I could talk to him. I pulled away, only enough to look into his face, but not pull out of his grasp. He returned my gaze with his own, greive laden, pain inflicted eyes, while his face gave nothing away as usual. He hald heartedly smiled at me, seeing that I was finally doing something other than crying.
He brought his hand up and wiped the remaining remnants of tears from my face, his amber eyes searching mine. When he spoke, he spoke slowly and for fear of setting me off again I think.
"Bella... honey... whats wrong?"
I shook me head and looked down before I bagan speaking. When I did, I was surprised at how rough my voice was, even after crying. My eyes started to tear up again, and my voice strained as I tried to compose myself.
"I.. I don't know how to explain it" I admitted
His eyebrows knitted together and he gently rubbed his thumb against my cheek bone.
"Please try" he pleaded
I shook myhead again, trying to clear the tears from my eyes. He waited patiantly for me to continue.
"You have to understand...I am so much more than happy to have this baby... but what happens after I have it?"
I looked up into happier eyes, but I still saw that they were worried. He scanned my face with his eyes before carfuly continuing.
"If you want.. I will turn you into a vampire"
"But!" I hurriedly looked down when I saw that my sudden response had brought back the pain to his eyes. "What about... what about my familt?" I asked quietly
I felt him tense, and I felt a sudden pang fo guilt. I did hurt him, just like I thought I would. I shook me head again, fresh tears streaming down my cheeks as I hugged him. He seemed surprised by my sudden closeness and for a moment sat there not knowing what to do. After a moment, he wrapped his arms around me stifly.
"Im.. so.. sorry.. Edward" I managed between gasps
He started to rock us back and forth , tring his best to sooth me, his hand running through my hair as he hummed his lullaby to me. I stayed against his smooth, flawless, cold chest until I had once again regained composure. I sat there for a while longer, enjoying his embrace, like I had every other time. But unlike every other time, this embrace was different. Like those few kisses we had shared before we were separated, this embrace seemed to be more urgent, and more stiff than the other ones did.
My eyebrows knitted together and I had a sudden feeling that something wasn't right. I pulled away to look into his eyes again and I noticed that he wouldn't look at me this time. He just looked to the ground, staring at some spot on the tile floor. I was suddenly very nervous and my heart raced in my chest, pushing the blood through my viens at an almost unbearable speed. This he noticed and looked to me with angelic eyes once again, perfectly hiding every tace of pain and anguish that ha had just previously been experiencing.
He looked to me, his lips parting as he went to speak, but I covered his mouth with my hand, not allowing him to continue. His eyebrows knitted together and his eyes were confused when he looked to me. I still felt guilty about what I had done, and I tried to smile, but it was only half hearted. He picked up on it instantly, and frustration filled he eyes with the confusion.
"Edward...I want more than anything in the worl to be with you, forever, but... I'm not ready yet..."
As I spoke, my eyebrows knitted together and fear filled my eyes. Would I hurt him again? I watched his reaction, carfuly analyzing everything. As I watched, I saw his eyes relaz and seem at ease. This confused me and it was obvious on my face because he brought his hand up to stroke my cheek lightly, while looking deep into my eyes, and speaking in his velvety soft tone again.
"Bella, it's alright. I do not in any way want to rush you into anything at all. When you are readym it will happen, but not until then. I promise you."
He smiled that amazing crooked smile and I couldn't help but to smile in return. His smile became even lighter as he saw that my mood was finally shifting back to where it normally is. For a moment, he stared into me eyes, his amber ones seeming to be questioning something. Slowly, he free hand held my face on the other side and he slowly inched toward my face. I sat there waiting, like always, for his lips to be on mine, and when they were, I couldn't control myself. LIke always, I got over excited and wrapped my arms around his neck, twisting my fingers through his hair, pulling him closer to me. He didn't tense under me, but he did break the kiss, holding my face inched from his. Once again I smelled the sweet, mouth watering scent of his breath, his skin, and I once again couldn't control think straight. I saw the smile and excitement in his eyes, along with one other thing I had seen on many occasions before. Lust.
In ont fluid motion, he was standing with me in his arms, carying me bridal style from the bathroom and into his bedroom. For the past few months, since I found out I was pregnant with his child, I have been staying at the Cullens house so that Dr. Cullen could help me through the pregnancy and carrying of a vampire baby.
Edward was quickly in 'our' room, and placing me on the bed gently, ever so lightly laying down on the bed next to me. I rolled over so that I was facing him, his pale face now clearly visible in the bright morning light, his skin once again sparkling like diamonds. The amazement was clear in my eyes as I saw his wry smile spread across his face. In an instant he got up and ran to close the blinds before returning to the bed, and laying next to me again. His arm went around my waist and his velvet soft voice was at my ear again.
"You tend to get distracted when I am in the sun"
HIs voice wasn't his normal velvety voice either. It was tainted with list and his amber eyes gloqing in the dark had the same listful light to them. My blood raced through my viens. In the dark I saw his teeth glow as he smiled and then he was on top of me, carefully holding his weight above me still enought that I could feel muscles clearly pressed against me. My heart raced even more and I;, sure he could hear it now. All was quiet in the house. The rest of the family had gonefor the weekend, which left the house to just Edward and I.
Slowly, I felt Edward move toward me in the dark, seeing his eyes getting ever closer, until they were suddenly gone. Instead, I could feel his stony, frozen lips on mine. Again, I coulnd't control myself. I wrapped my arms around his neck once more and intertwined my fingers through his hair. This time however, he did not stop me. Instead, he reached behind his head, unwrapped my arms while kissing me, and held my wrists down on the bed above my head with his own firmly tightened around them. He let hinself lean a little closer and deepended the kidd. I parted my lips and felt his tongue along the edge of my bottom lip, sending shivers through me. I felt him smile on my lips and he bagan exploring my mouth with his tongue. Still it sent shivers through me, and I tried in vain to free my hands from his metal grasp. To pull him closer to me with my fingers through his hair, but he wouldn't let me. He would not relinquish his hold on my hands.
Instead, he slowly broke the kiss and started to kiss my neck, slowly working his way down to my collar bone. I breathed in a shaky gasp and hears him chuckle, then felt his cold lips work thier way back up my neck to my cheek. Once he kissed my cheek, he stopped and stared into my eyes intently, the pure desire so eveidant that it was unmistakable. Again I gasped slightly and watched as he smiled a wicked grin and his eyes lit up.
Again his lips found mine in a hungry kiss and he still did not release my hands. Again, his tongue brushed against my lips and I kissed hin back, this time, I was the one to deepen the kiss. I parted my lips and lifted my head, pushing myself closer to him, seeing as I couldn't pull him closer to me. He responded and kissed me back more hungrily now.
Suddenly his muscles went rigid and he pulled away from me, hs face still inches from mine. His eyes were closed and the grip on my wrists slightly tightened. My heart raced, and I knew it wouldnt help anything. I tried to breath evenly, but I was still trying to gasp for breath from our closeness. I heard his breathing become raspy and deliberate. I heard the grinding of his teeth and his weight ver slowly lifting off of me. He was still over me though and the grip he had on my wrists still wasn't released.
"...Edward?"
My voice came out weak and hesitant, surprising me. I had dealt with him like this before, why was I scared now? Maybe it was his hands holding me down, and I couldn't get away this time if something went wrong. I was more scared thatn I thought I was.
"Just.. give me a minute please"
His voice was strained and I went stiff under him, afraid that the slightest movement would set him off. For several minutes he stayed in the position, trying to calm himself. After what seemed like an eternity, I saw his amber eyes open again, but they were darker than before. He had to feed. My heart raced still, I just couldn't stop it. His voice came out hisky and clearly strained.
"I'm sorry about that"
"Its ok"
His eyes turned mocking and a mischievious grin curled up the corners of his mouth. He released his hold on my wrists and braught his hands down to hold my face, causing my heart to beat faster stll. He smiled and his now darker amber eyes held mine. His voice was velvety soft again as he spoke.
"Why do you insist on lying to me still?"
"What? I don't"
My statement was obviously a lie and he saw right through it like he always did, with a small chuckle that lit his eyes up with humor.
"Bells, I can;t read your mind, but I do know when you are lying. You are a terrible lier"
"Oh, gee thanks"
My voice was filled with false anger and I rolled my eyes, looking away from himn to the wall. He laughed and layed nect to me, once again wrapping his arms around me and placing his hands on my stomach. His voice was at my ear again, back to its normal, warm tone that relaxed me, his lips brushing my ear as he spoke.
"So, what are we gonna name it?"
The curiosity in his voice made me laught. It sounded almost as if he still wasn't sure that having the baby was what upset me. I shook me head and relazed into his embrace once again, completely relaxed.
"It would depend, wouldn't it? If its a girl, I was maybe thinking of Elizabeth Ann"
My sentence sounded like a question as I said it, waiting to see what he said. For a moment, he was silent, and then he nodded and spoke, this time his lips brushing against my skin, right under my ear, causing me to shiver again. Again he chuckled before responding.
"Thats a very beautiful name"
I smiled pleased that he like the name idea
"What will we call it if it is a boy?"
"Hmmm..."
I thought about it for a moment before an idea came to mine. I rolled over and looked him in the eyes, smiling brightly. I saw him smile back before speaking.
"What are you thinking?"
"Edward"
"Yes?"
"No. If its a boy, we will name it Edward"
He didn't say anything at first, sure surprise in his eyes. After a few moments, his eyes softened and his hand moved to stroke my cheek bone lightly, then tuck my hair behind my ear. When he spoke, his voice was different. Almost like he was trying to control some emotion that was really happy.
"That sounds like a good name too"
I beamed at him in the dark. He pulled me gently to him and kissed me. After a few moments, he gently broke the kiss and once again rubbed my cheek bone. His eyes met mine, and they were lit with delight. I couldn't help but to let my smile widen.
As we were laying there, I heard a couple car doors close. My eyes grew excited and I saw Edwards grow confused.
"What is it?"
"Your family is home"
"Yes... they are"
"Whats the matter? Come on, lets go see them"
In an instant, he was on his feet and opening the blinds on the window. I shielded my eyes from the bright light and stood when in the next second, Edward was at the bed side offering me his hand, that same confusion in his eyes. I took it and he opened the door or me. The two of us walked down the hallway to greet his family.
Well, what did you think? You like it? Please send me reviews! Critisism, althought not too harsh, is appreciated. I will post another chapter if I get five revies on this one. Hope you liked it!
