I won't be home for Xmas

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing! The song "I Won't Be Home For Xmas" is by Blink 182, and is used without permission. However, since I am not gaining anything financially from this it really doesn't matter! Anyway it's just for fun!!

I WON'T BE HOME FOR XMAS

*Heero is sitting on WingZero. Duo, Quatre, and Relena all gather at the foot of his Gundam. Heero looks down at the trio suspiciously. They all have stupid grins, and pull out sheets of lyrics from behind their backs and start singing Christmas carols. Heero rolls his eyes and groans. He starts singing*

Outside the carolers start to sing

I can't describe the joy they bring

Cuz joy is something they don't bring me

I have my gun by my side

From Zero's head are hanging sickles of ice

Their whiny voices get irritating

It's Christmas time again!

*He jumps down from Zero and stands before the three annoying ones*

So I stand with a dead smile on my face

Wondering how much of my time they'll waste

Oh God I hate these Satan's helpers!!!

*Heero looks maliciously at them, then pulls out a baseball bat*

And then I guessed I must have snapped

Because I grabbed a baseball bat

And made them all run for shelter

*He chases them around with the bat. Duo trips over Quatre and falls head first into the snow. Relena starts yelling "Heeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrooooooooo!!!!!" Heero turns around and starts chasing her. She ducks behind a snowman, which Heero easily decapitates with one swing of his baseball bat. Quatre runs to a payphone and calls the cops.*

It's Christmas time again

It's time to be nice to the people you can't stand

All year

I'm growing tired of all this Christmas cheer

You people scare me

Please stay away from my Gundam

If you don't want to piss me off

Just leave the presents and then leave me alone

*The cops come and zap Heero with a stun gun. Relena stands in front of him protectively and shouts, "Why do you want to shoot him for!?" The two cops look at each other then zap Relena as well. Duo starts laughing hysterically.*

*Heero inside cop car*

Well I guess it's not cool to freak on Christmas Eve

Cuz the cops came and arrested me, they had an unfair advantage

And even though the jail didn't have a tree

Christmas came unidlely

Cuz Relena sent me a care package

*Sits inside jail cell and opens package from Relena. It's a picture of her which he promptly pins to the wall and uses as a dart board.*

It's Christmas time again

It's time to be nice to the people you can't stand

All year

I'm growing tired of all this Christmas cheer

You people scare me

Please stay away from my Gundam

If you don't want to piss me off

Just leave the presents and then leave me alone!

*Heero looks outside of prison window longingly at WingZero in the impound lot*

I won't be home

I won't be home for Christmas

Repeat 5X…

*Suddenly he hears something. Outside the prison, Duo, Quatre, and Relena are singing again. He screams and pulls his hair. Then smiles evilly and reaches into his pocket and pulls out WingZero's self-detonator. He pushes the button and a loud explosion is heard. Heero looks outside to see Duo, Quatre, and Relena pinned under a bunch of wreckage. Quatre starts crying. Heero smiles to himself*

Ha Ha The End.

I know it's completely stupid, and probably not worth reading but the song fits Heero's attitude perfectly!!! I really only changed two or three of the lyrics!! ^_^ Tell me what you think!!