A/N: I am tired of all the poems about Speak. I wanted a story, and no offence, a good, non-rambly similair writing style story. Most ones that I have attempted to read I couldn't see Melinda doing any of those things, especially like that.

Summary: Melinda escapes into music, but what does she find? Does she do something that makes her... feel alive?

Disclaimer: I don't own Speak or All Around Me by Flyleaf.

Still Alive

by Spot-da-vampyre-puppi

My hands are searching for you

My arms are outstretched towards you

I feel you on my finger tips

My tounge dances behind my lips

for you.

Why'd I choose this song? It makes no sense for my life, I have no relation to it.

But the pain. The pain her voice held, it gave me hope. Maybe she had an And- an IT- of her own. I can always pretend.

The fire rising through my being

I can relate to that.

Burning I'm not used to seeing

You.

IT. I am not used to seeing him, for sure. Nor shall I ever be.

I'm alive

Me: "Immalive"

I'm alive

"I'm alive." My room is empty. My purple wallpaper is still here. I am alone, as usual. But even as I glance out my dark window. IT's face never leaves. I can see it instead of my reflection.

I can feel you all around me

Thickening the air I'm breathing

Holding on to what I'm feeling

Savoring this heart's that healing

IT never leaves.I am suffocating. Maybe this song's right. Water leaks out of my eyes. Great. I think, Just freaking great. I roll my eyes.

My hands float up above me

And you whisper you love me

And I begin to fade

Into our secret place.

That party. More salt water pours out of my face. That freaking party.

We danced.

We laughed.

We kissed.

He didn't say that he loved me, I can remember. But he said that he wanted me. Over over over.

I shudder.

The music makes me sway

The angels singing

Say we are alone with you.

I am alone, and they are too with you

Where was my angel? Why didn't it save me?

I'm alive

I'm alive

I lay on my bed, staring at my ceiling, making shapes in the popcorn. I mumble along with the words.

I can feel you

All around me

Thickening the air I'm breathing

Holding on to what I'm feeling

Savoring this heart that's healing

I get up. The song still playing in my head. I leave on my bicycle. I know what I am doing. Quickly, I arrive, my tools in hand.

And so I cry

The lights so white

And I see you.

I'm alive I'm alive I'm alive. My brain quotes the song. I climb the viney window to find my-... Victim? Close enough.

I find him. He's alone. IT. I grip my wrench in my hand. He doesn't see me.

I can feel you all around me

Thickening the air I am breathing

Holding on to what I'm feeling

I mumble. Me: "Savoring this heart that's healing."

He sees me.

I raise the heavy tool and let my hand fall. Over over over.

"I am alive." I whisper. I go over to the sink and get a rag. I wash my wrench, I was my arms, the floor, and finally, his unmoving form.

I'm still alive.

No one will ever know.

I go home. I take the hammer and beat the wrench. One big dent and it's changed enough that it doesn't look the same. I put it back. I go to bed.

Take my hand

I give it toyou

Now you owe me

All I m

You said you would never leave me

I believed you

I believed.

"I'm still alive." I whisper as I fall asleep.