Spiders

Columbus said he had alot of irrational phobias... Here we are to explore them. .... Ones I am planning on working with include thunder and lightning, snakes, spiders (Below), getting lost, the dark, and the fear of being locked in a tight space....

Okay... Yes, I know Daddy Longlegs are harmless, but they're still the spider that freaks me out the most... But to Columbus, they're just as deadly as any zombie.

"Arachnophobia or arachnephobiais a specific phobia, the irrational fear of spiders and other arachnids. It is a manifestation of zoophobia, among the most common of all phobias. The reactions of arachnophobics often seem irrational to others (and sometimes to the sufferers themselves)." ~ Wikipedia


Columbus was a safe driver. Always had been, always would be.

Tallahassee, suffice to say, wasn't. But even the redneck needed sleep now and again. It was that simple. So, during the once in a blue moon episode where the wheel was entrusted to the younger man, Columbus made use of it, and held it in a steady sixty through sixty-five range, staying on the dangerous side of sixty.

Morning had finally reared its ugly head with the weight of a Monday, sending a watered light over the roads. Yellow dashes raced ahead of him on the tarmac, and the road was blissfully empty on all sides. The road would probably never experience much more than this level of traffic for the rest of its existence. It was a sad, sobering thought.

Columbus blinked twice as the slanted sunlight spilled across the hummer's windshield, blinding him for a moment as he drove. The light had no effect on the man who was sitting next to him in the passenger seat. He was dead asleep.

Columbus cringed at his own choice of words, and with a practiced dart of obsessive and compulsory eyes, took his gaze off the road for a moment to look at Tallahassee. Chest rising and falling with a deep, steady rhythm, hat pulled down low for a brim to cover his pale blue eyes, closed and relaxed in sleep, nose and lips wrinkling in a silent snarl. Columbus figured he was probably dreaming about a glorious massacre...

And so, with that comforting thought in mind, he turned hs attention back to driving....Or...At least he tried to.

Columbus had barely turned his attention back when he saw it.

Long, spindly, needle thing legs that held a body, sickeningly plump in comparison, suspended in the air. The legs moved and waved in impossibly synchronized and mesmerizing movements, freezing him in place as he stared at it. The Daddy Long legs scuttled quickly over the dash...towards...oh god...the horror... The direction of the steering wheel, and more importantly, him. Panicking, he scrambled for his seat-belt, vaguely aware of the sudden swerve the hummer had taken on. He accidentally kicked the brake pedal twice in his haste, sending the car jerking, and his fingers sliding along the cool metal of the buckle, eyes still frozen on the arachnid that was carrying its body, now down the curve of the steering wheel.

The spider was very clearly coming after him...It would bite him, and he would die, and it would be embarrassing as hell, and just horrible all around. Panicky noises continued squeezing from his throat and Columbus bounced in his seat as they went over the shoulder and started into the ditch and-

A calloused hand darted over and grabbed the steering wheel, jerking it sharply towards the road. The spider was lost beneath the strong fingers with a barely audible soft crunch, and Tallahassee guided the car back to the road where it coasted gently to a stop. He did have some practice with ditch driving, after all. Columbus kept his eyes on the steering wheel as the fingers lifted. Underneath, he could see the smashed spider's body, legs twitching.

Okay...Either he never drove this car again...Or they got a new steering wheel.

Tallahassee took note of what Columbus was staring at.

"That's what you were screaming about.....A fuckin' ..spider?"

"Yeah.." Columbus blinked, and blushed, embarrassed.

"A spider....A. Fuckin'. Spider."

"I thought we had gone over this just like two second ago."

"We almost crashed in the ditch....Because of a spider?"

"I don't think we would've crashed....But essentially...Yes....I'm...Kinda....afraid....Of them.." Columbus explained haltingly.

"Oh really? What with the sissy panic attack and shrieking and all...I didn't notice."

"Sorry," Was all Columbus responded with, eyeing the dead arachnid.

"If that isn't proof of your bitch-dom....I don't know what is." Tallahassee snorted, brushing it off on his hand, then his pants.

Columbus just sighed, and moved to turn over the wheel.


Okay....Up next will be snakes, for which I shall explore the area of zoo animals....And Columbus will get a hug. From a python.