A/N: This is a terrible oneshot. It does everything wrong, yet turns out a beutiful butterfly of shit. This is a satire in response to the fanfiction hatred.
It was another beutiful day on Mobius. The sun shined down on this warm day as a purple hedgehog carrying dual katanas strolled through the lush forest. This is Konno Yumi(紺野 Konno (dark blue plains) 弓美 Yumi (beautiful bow, as in bow and arrow),the long lost sister of the world renowned Sonic the Hedgehog. She is coming home after being at the Ninja Academy for 16 years. She was discovered by Sensei Fuji, the greatest ninja in the valley, at a young age. She demonstrated great focus and Sensei Fuji believed she could be the greatest ninja to live. It was hard for their parents to let her go, but Sensei Fuji promised her complete safety. In the end, Konno Yumi was seperated from her brother, and the two never saw eachother again.
Until now, Konno cared about nothing but perfecting her ninja skills, but finding out she had a brother changed that. She has spent days searching but one day found him. Konno met him during a fight against the infamous Dr. Eggman, where she used her dual katanas, which were on fire, to completely slice the robot he built. Sonic thanked her, then Konno revealed the secret to him. Sonic bursted into tears to meet. the sister he never knew he had. He quickly introduced her to his friends, and Shadow quickly took a liking to her, even fell in love with her at first sight, but he was rivaled by Silver, who she loved. Silver would often brag about it just to anger Shadow, but Konno didn't mind because she never really learned to realize when she was being treated like a trophy.
For the next few days, Silver took Konno to several hotspots in the future on dates. This only made Shadow angrier. Eventually, Shadow decided to take Konno out on a date. He took her, on his motorcycle, to the beach, where the two hit it off. Silver showed up while they were making out and became angry with Shadow. He picked Shadow up telepathicly exclaiming "It's no use!" and slamming Shadow against the ground hard. Shadow retaliated by using Chaos Control to stop time in order to kick Silver in the back of the head. Konno yelled for the two to stop, which they did. Konno decided that niether of them deserved her, so she said goodbye to everyone, and returned to the Ninja Academy.
A/N: There. You think fanfiction is bad? Well, here's a really bad one to satisfy you. You're welcome.
