Summary: Harper doesn't approve of Beka's date for the evening. Pre-Drom.

Pairings: Implied Beka/other.

Disclaimer: Tribune owns all rights to Andromeda. All I did was borrow it for use in my twisted little tale.

Rating: PG-13

Spoilers: None.

Setting: Pre-Drom.

Feedback: Please! Praise and constructive criticism welcome. Flames will be employed in killing the shrub at the end of my driveway.

Archive: Ask first and I'll probably say yes.

Author's Note: For some reason, this conversation appeared in my head one day. It amused me enough to post.

Definition of Stupidity

By B.L.A. the Mouse

"Seriously?" Harper stood in the doorway of the bunkroom, staring at Beka incredulously.

"Yes, seriously," she answered, a little testily, as she tugged on the laces of her boot.

"I mean, come on, again?" He stepped in. He had not been anticipating Rev's little bombshell about for whom Beka was dressing up to see, nor did he appreciate it. "Do you not remember the death threats? Have you completely forgotten about the shooting and the screaming last time?"

She huffed at him as she stood to strap on her weapons belt. "That was just a misunderstanding. It's been all straightened out by now. He said. Besides," and she looked up from the buckle, a glint in her eye, "you were the only screaming, as I recall."

"A, I was not the only one, and B, mine was really a battle cry. You just misinterpreted it, which is entirely understandable since everyone else was screaming." He skittered out of the way when she walked toward him. Her destination was apparently the mirror tucked beside the tiny bathroom, and when he followed her she continued as if he hadn't said a word.

"Besides, it's just drinks and maybe a little dancing. I'll be back in a few hours."

"So you're probably going to sleep with him."

"I'm not actually intending to sleep." She must have seen his mock-gag in the mirror, as she said defensively, "Hey, I have needs!"

"So do I. You don't see me running off with proven scum-sucking weasels to take care of them."

He frowned as she continued to primp, not even pausing in running her fingers through her hair to sigh. "Harper…"

"No, no, maybe you're right. Calling him that is an offense to scum-sucking weasels everywhere."

That pushed a button, or at least irritated her enough to get her to stop fussing over her appearance momentarily. She glared at his reflection in the mirror. "I have an idea. Why don't you go out and get your own needs seen to instead of bugging me about mine?" She didn't wait for a reply before picking up a lipstick and starting to apply it.

He gave her a reply anyway. "I have a better idea: Ditch him and stick around here. I see to your needs, you see to mine, and he gets to be the one hung out to dry for a change."

She snorted. The head shake might have been in response to his comment, but probably wasn't given that her hair darkened to auburn with the movement. "Nice try. Still not happening." She made a final onceover in the mirror and then she turned to face him, her expression softening a little. "Seriously, go have fun. I'll be fine."

"No, I feel like staying in." Beka nodded in acknowledgement and stepped around him to go to the airlock. He made sure to add, just loud enough for her to hear with her back to him, "Just in case we need to make a quick getaway. Again."

The End