Ten years is enough time for someone to change... And indeed, everything that is related to the world changes through time. Even I have also changed with the passage of time for as far as I can remember. For the past ten years; a lot has happened and things started to move on a rather faster pace that I still can't believe that this is now the present. In that case; I have undergone changes in terms of appearance and... my outlook in everything.

When I was still younger; I am nothing more but a person who tried hard to make sure that results end up favorable in my side... And in that; I have been constantly building walls over and over again. But those walls that I have already built back when I was younger has been slowly removed as the years gone by... especially when I am with her. She is the only one who have managed to stay beside me regardless of my status... probably because of her airheadedness at times; but... I am thankful for her airheadedness because if she was aware that I am 'Chisato Shirasagi, the child star', she might not have been able to approach me.

Anyhow, ten years has passed and a lot has changed for me; the whole band, as expected; has already disbanded... but it was a good time for us to disband due to our growing commitments and even though we don't perform anymore as a group; we do hang out whenever we meet one another... though Eve-chan is the hardest one to contact since she is in France at this time... of course; she is busy conquering the world of modeling. Our Leader Aya Maruyama, is a very positive girl; she finally earned her recognition as a superstar when she won her first newcomer's award... though it took her 3 years after her debut to become famous; Aya-chan didn't gave up and her efforts has paid off. I guess I can call her my rival at this point since we do meet from time to time because the fans asks for us... or something along the lines. Anyways; Aya and I are still friends, and whenever we are alone; she complains how hectic her schedule is... well; so much that one time; she got sick... she better take care of her health since that's her investment and she can't return back if she isn't 100% healthy. Our guitarist Hina Hikawa, she is quite an eccentric, and most of the times; strange... is now doing well with her elder twin. I haven't got much news on her but according to Hazawa-san from the Hazawa Cafe; Hina comes by to do something since she is bored. As always, Hina gets bored and she tends to wander around... But I did heard that she tried applying for Roselia only ending up being rejected... I guess Hina is quite frustrated and she is doing her best to become who she wanted to be. Right; maybe she might one day decide to apply as an actress so I mustn't slack off at all. Our Drummer Maya Yamato, the shy one of our band is now holding Drumming lessons. At first; I was like... is that even possible? But even so... Maya does her best to make sure her students are doing well... Anyhow; of all of the girls; Only Maya is married... obviously from someone we have no idea where... but during Maya-chan's wedding... she was truly happy and we can't really deny that she is living her life well. I do hope that she continues to hang around... well; I also do hope that her husband understands that our friendship is something that has already transcends time and space... or something. And lastly, The bassist Chisato Shirasagi... or your's truly... Is now an award winning actress... of course that is possible because of my fans and my involvement with Pastel*Palettes. I live now on my own and I enjoy the tranquility of my solo life... I do have visitors from time to time; and I was never bored of it. My little sister still borrow clothes from me, but once she managed to become an image model; maybe she will stop borrowing my clothes altogether. Then again, I don't really mind if she does. Anyhow; I am single because I decided to and that's how life as a celebrity is. Not many celebrities get married and it's rare for them to last for longer periods. That's why, maybe I am fine if I can live my life as an old lady who hasn't taste the fruit called love.

As I contemplate about life; I realized that the time is already at around 4 in the afternoon.

"Right; I better contact Kanon now; she might be lost again." I uttered to myself as I reach out for my phone.

But before I can reach it; I heard Kanon's voice coming from the front door.

"Chisato-chan, I came here to play." Kanon said as she looking at the camera

"I'll be there for a sec..." I replied as I headed towards the front gate.

Kanon Matsubara; my oldest and most trusted friend... she is the only person who have managed to make friends of me despite my status as a celebrity. I guess people like her are truly exceptional in a sense.

"Kanon, I'm surprised that you made it here without getting lost." I said as I pour coffee on Kanon's cup.

"Ah. I met Kaoru-san on the way and she showed me here." Kanon happily replied as she takes the cup.

"Ah, that annoying person..." I spoke as I put the cake on the table.

After ten years; Kaoru Seta is the same person I knew back then; I still can't stand her... and as such she is the person I can't deal with... I wonder how Kanon managed to become friends with her. But, I don't mind it anyways since she takes care of Kanon for my sake.

"Is there something wrong, Chisato-chan?" Kanon asked me as she looks at my face.

"Nothing. I am somewhat thankful to Kaoru to bring you here..." I replied.

"I see... Anyhow; thanks for coffee and cake Chisato-chan." Kanon happily replied as she eats the cake.

Once a week; Kanon visits my house to talk to me. Though she doesn't really have to do it; I guess she is just worried for my sake... probably Aya told her something that she shouldn't too... Anyhow; with Kanon here, I feel at ease too.

"Chisato-chan, it's quite a long time we have been friends, right?" Kanon brought the topic.

"Indeed... it's been quite long." I replied.

With the passage of time; Kanon became a woman that any man would want. She still smiles earnestly and even though she is still a klutz; those circumstances has already decreased as she matures over time... is it because we are slowly becoming adults already? Or we have become adults without us knowing?

"Chisato-chan, say... have you ever thought about getting married?" Kanon asked me as she looks at me.

"Now that you mentioned it. I have no plans at this point... being an actress tires me out and I can't help it if I am unable to allot time to entertain a suitor or two." I replied.

"I see... I guess your priority for now is work." Kanon replied as she looks on her now empty coffee cup.

I wonder why Kanon asked me such a question... it's quite rare for her to open such conversation and as such... Could it be!?

"Kanon, why did you ask about such matters anyways? Is there something bothering you?" I asked panickingly as I can't hide my feelings too well.

"Hmm... you see, I have been asked a lot of guys before; but I have turned them all down... could it be that I am destined to be a old lady too?" Kanon spoke as she shows her worries about her future.

"I see... I don't think it's bad... we are at the state where we supposed to think things through... Afterall, Kanon is a beautiful woman now... I am sure you can find the right partner for you." I spoke as I just stated the truth.

But indeed, Kanon is such a beautiful woman that I sometimes wonder why my heart sometimes waver whenever we are together... Could it be, that I am having these feelings for my best friend? But even so, even if we are close friends; I haven't really thought of it as such that it would make me blush this way...

Now that I realized; Kanon and her folks from Hello, Happy World! are still doing some gigs but they are not as active as they were before... but even so; whenever they perform. It was a blockbuster and everyone's on their seats until the end. In the end; everyone has managed to find their own play style and thus; even after they have become busy with their real life obligations; they never forget to perform at least once a month which also served as their get-together. Kanon is currently working as a civil servant and she is quite loved by many. I wonder, why she hasn't got any confessions? Probably because of her guards... or something like that.

Kanon looked at the her watch and she smiled at me and she started to stand up from her seat...

"Chisato-chan; I have to go now..." Kanon spoke as she rises up from her seat.

But for some reasons, I stopped her from going home...

"Chisato-chan? What's wrong?" Kanon asked me with a puzzled look on her face.

"Can you stay here for tonight..." I spoke as if something else took over me.

"Hmm... I guess I can. We are adults anyways." Kanon happily replied as she sits down once again.

And for some reasons, my heart feels happy.

The night came and Kanon made our dinner. For the first time; i've got to see Kanon's skill in cooking... and for some reason; i felt so nervous for the first time.

"Chisato-chan! Dinner is ready." Kanon arrive while carrying our meal for today.

The meal Kanon made is Nikujaga and it looked so delicious that I can't wait to eat it.

"Somehow; it's really strange that Chisato-chan asked me to stay over; Anyhow... just to show my appreciation; I will give you the food that I just learned to make a few days ago." Kanon spoke as she bows her head to me.

The food looks mouth-watering and its scent is drawing me in as if it invites me to devour it already. In that instance; i knew that I am hungry and thus; i decided to eat it along with Kanon who seemed truly happy with her work.

After taking the bath inside the large outdoor bath that I made for my own personal relaxation; Kanon and I changed our clothes and we leisurely sat at the living room while we simply pass the time away. Since tomorrow is a weekend and also my day-off, I can much laze around and have fun conversations with Kanon to whom I haven't heard much from her ever since those times. The reason to is pretty simple; but counting on those small instances; it had built up over time and it became a mountain as such… it's a great time for them to catch up to how they are doing in their life.

"Kanon, how's work?" I asked as I sat beside my best friend.

"It's hard; but rewarding. A lot of people are praising me for my work and I want to continue to the utmost of my abilities." Kanon happily replied as she looks at me.

Kanon, she used to be quite cowardly, but as she met the members of Hello, Happy World! She has transformed into this spirited young girl who can be quite daring at times.

"Kanon, do you still… perform on-stage?" I asked as I don't really have the gall to ask that question.

"Yes. From time to time. Tomorrow; we have a gig… do you want to watch too?" Kanon happily replied as she invites me to her live gig tomorrow.

"I might draw a lot of attention if I do that…" I spoke as I just said the apparent future.

"Oh, no need to worry about that. They'll be curious on why an actress like you watches a concert from an already semi-retired band like ours. Ehehehe…" Kanon replied with a bit embarrassment on her face. I guess she is worried a bit on their band's future… but likewise to say; since Kanon hasn't quit the band… I guess that means that she is brave enough to endure everything.

Out of the blue, Kanon held my hand… as if she is concerned about me… her eyes looked at mine and slowly; I felt like I was being drawn in by her eyes that only sees kindness.

"Chisato-chan, I heard some rumors about you turning down a prominent businessman who has expressed his admiration to you. I know that you are doing it because you know that you don't know the person themselves but… What if, there'll come a time where no one knocks on your doorsteps? As your friend; I can't bear to watch my friend being left alone in the race for happiness."

For some reason; Kanon said things that are quite true… after all; I have met that businessman sometime in the past; I knew right away that he isn't for me; despite his rather gentleman advances; I truthfully told him that I can't really marry him or be his fiancé. He understood in the end and we somewhat became friends after that. Anyhow; for Kanon to know this… I wonder if gossips are truly a scary thing or Kaoru leaked some of the juicy data to her since she was the one who knew right from the start.

"Kanon, finding happiness is not a race… many might find it in the early years of their life… and some find it at the middle of it or some even find it at the end; It's not a race… happiness is heavily decided to our own selfish decisions and at the end of the day; not regretting our choices can lead us towards our happiness."

After I said those words to Kanon; she let go of my hand and she hugged me tight. Seeing her cry for me is something that I didn't expect at all. I guess she surprises me to no end.

"I see… Chisato-chan I won't interfere anymore." Kanon happily spoke as she lets go of me.

That instance; Kanon took out a toy ring that we both bought some time in the past. It was a token of our long friendship and right now…

"Chisato-chan, even if your happiness comes later… I do wish that you may find happiness that you can happily share to others."

"Yes. Also, I do hope that Kanon can receive a part of that happiness since you are my best friend." I replied.

For some reason; I felt that I was to ask Kanon something, but everything went buried with all the emotions Kanon had during that time; It was disappointing but there is nothing I can do for the moment.

It's night time and it was the good time for us to get some sleep. I went to my room, changed into my sleeping clothes and starting to get some sleep; After All; sleep is an important necessity of someone from the harsh world of show business so, having a good night's worth of sleep is already a blessing itself.

But before I could close my eyes, the door opens and Kanon who is wearing her sky-blue pajamas came inside and she immediately places on my left as she borrows a space from my bed.

"Chisato-chan, sorry to wake you up."

"Not a problem, I was just about to close my eyes... also, Why did you decide to sleep besides me?"

"Ah, I always wondered how Chisato-chan looks like when she is sleeping... Ah."

I smiled a bit from Kanon's comment... as if those words have rekindled something inside of me.

"Kanon, it's rude to look at a sleeping person's face... but, since we are friends; I don't mind you looking at me all night long."

"Fuee~!"

"Just kidding... but Kanon, why did you want to sleep beside me?"

"Ah... you see..."

Kanon spoke as she strangely fidgets around... I guess in some cases; people find happiness in the simplest matters and those people tend to be very happy since their happiness is something that can be achieved reasonably... but somehow; her story stings my heart as she tells a tale about her and a certain individual she met a year ago.

I know that it's rude for me to say this but... I don't like that guy for Kanon... but even so... I have no right to intervene with Kanon's choice... afterall... we are friends and if Kanon has already decided to love a man... then, All I can just do is to support her.

But...

Is it going to end in this way?

Is it going to head towards this ending?

Am I truly going to be happy in this ending?

Will I be able to become happy once I smiled for her?

I don't know... afterall... I am selfish, self centered... and not suitable to love...

Ah...

I have forgot...

I wear a lot of masks...

and only Kanon can remove those...

I forgot...

Kanon is the only one I have...

In this endless storm that I call life...

Kanon is the rainbow that shines at the end...

If Kanon is going to be taken away from me...

I might not be able to see my true self anymore...

That's why...

Morning came and Kanon and I woke up and have our breakfast together; Last night... I said some words that I shouldn't speak... and Kanon hasn't spoken back to me at this point. After breakfast, Kanon took her leave and went out without bidding farewell to me. Ah, this sucks... this truly sucks...

For me who have been so selfish; I haven't have the time to understand someone else... Afterall; all I care is myself... the moment I bare my feelings to her... she didn't answered me back and she left me behind.

Tears drop from my eyes... that is the first time I saw Kanon's eyes filled with disgust. I don't care anymore... if she hates me, then it's better this way...

But for some reasons; I find myself listening to their performance... it's already evening and I find myself listening to their songs... Hello, Happy World!'s songs.

But my eyes were fixated on Kanon who is happily drumming with all her might. Her expression is filled with life and happiness as she drums gives her feelings to every beat of the drum. And as such; as our eyes meet; I felt Kanon immediately avoided it and soon; I felt cold... as if ice has been dumped on me.

for that moment, I knew... that I lost my best friend forever.

"Oh my, what does a famous actress like you doing here, drinking wine?" Kaoru asked me as she sits beside me.

"Nothing. I am free to do whatever I want." I replied.

"Is that so... Say, you never looked me in the eye once so... why does your eyes filled with tears?"

Indeed, at that moment, due to alcohol; the restraints I place to myself have been released and now; I am slowly showing my miserable side to the person I don't want to show.

"Is this about Kanon-chan, right?"

"What about it?"

"I see... you must have said something that made her upset... it's the first time I saw that Kanon... but well... let me tell you something; if someone else is discouraging you towards your goal, what would you do?"

"Normally, I just give it my best and prove them that they are wrong."

"That's true... since you are strong. Kanon-chan however... she isn't strong... she might be brave; but she is never strong to begin with... So, she needs some push from someone she truly trust."

"I see... so, in the end; I pushed her away... just like how I pushed you most of the times."

"Funny how you can say that to me now... normally; you would vehemently deny that."

"So, what does Kaoru Seta wants from me?"

"Ah... did I get blown?"

"I don't think so... it's just too convenient afterall..."

"That's true... anyways; I am sad to hear that kittens fight for me but... if my friends are in a bad situation; I always do my best to help them reconcile so..."

As Kaoru finished saying her words; I saw a familiar figure walking towards me. She didn't have a smile on her face on that instance... I know, she didn't want to see me but for some reason; she agreed to Kaoru's request.

"Kaoru-san, I'll talk with Shirasagi-san from here."

As I heard Kanon called me by my surname; my heart aches as if a stake was drive straight towards my heart.

At that moment; Kanon took me towards a vacant room which was reserved for the two of us.

The lights inside the room is enough to make the room looked like I was in some sort of a cheap room in a cheap hotel. even so, this is the best place for us to speak our minds regarding to clash of feelings we had last night. Even though she didn't answered back; Kanon slept beside me but despite that; she never uttered a word at all.

"Kanon..."

"Stop it... Shirasagi-san."

"Why..."

"It's not good for the two of us if we continue this..."

"But..."

"No Buts... Asides; we have agreed not to interfere with our happiness so, why are you doing this?"

"I..."

Without words to say; I can't say my true feelings for Kanon.

"Why would you want to stop me from meeting him? Is it because you know that he is no good? I already know that... after all; we have dates long ago... He is sweet, he is kind and most of all, he understands me... just like how you understand me... But... Why?"

"I can't say it Kanon... if I say it, I don't know if you are going to hate me more or not..."

"Say it! If I ended up hating you; then you should give me a reason to hate you..."

I took a deep breath and paused a bit; then; I exhaled and looked at Kanon who is looking for my answer.

"Kanon... I realized as of late... that no matter how many man that come to my life... I will always turn them down... because; they can't win my heart... but that reason is slightly wrong... the reason why they can't win my heart is because... my heart has already been won by you."

After I spoke those words; Kanon didn't spoke back... soon; she slapped me to my cheek and I can see tears trickle down on her face.

"IDIOt! JUST BECAUSE OF THAT, YOU ARE WILLING TO THROW AWAY THEIR OFFERS!? YOU ARE TRULY AN IDIOT!"

But what happens after is something that is beyond me...

Right after Kanon slapped me in the face; she hugged me tightly... as if she knew that I was a fool all along.

"Chisato-chan, want to hear what happened to that guy? I dumped him... even though he is sincere and I know that I can have a better life with him... I decided to dump him because... I love Chisato-chan who has been frantic with that story."

All of a sudden Kanon's warmth enveloped me as her body continued to touch mine... while she continues to hug me, I can feel that Kanon's words meant a lot because she decided to make me happy.

Soon, Kanon lets go of me and we looked at one another and for some reason; our eyes agreed to something and we slowly moved our lips closer to one another and in that instance; the world stops moving... as if time has totally stopped for the two of us. The two of us kissed one another until we let go and we look at one another... feeling the heat inside of me, I want to make Kanon happier... and so, Kanon and I continued kissing... until we have spent the heat that we are feeling in that moment.

the morning came, for some reasons; I found myself back at my room and Kanon is sleeping with me. I looked around me and I saw a note on the desk and I read it. It came from Kaoru of all people...


To Chisato Shirasagi

Last night; when I came to pick Kanon up; you two are sleeping quite peacefully; so I decided to take the two of you back to your home. Though Misaki is a bit reluctant at first; she just accepted my requested to place Kanon beside you since you two are quite something... Anyhow, if you two decided to do it; then; the whole Hello, Happy World and Pastel*Palettes will be supporting you all the way.

From

Kaoru Seta


Soon, I saw the clock and I realized that it's already 8 in the morning... Ah, my head aches...

"Ah, I guess I should notify them that I won't be making it in time... what a pain..." I said to myself as I reached out to my phone.

Kanon woke up and what greeted me is her smile that made my mornings felt like paradise... for some reason... I don't want to let her go anymore... that's why. we'll do our best... to make ourselves happy... so that In the end; we can find the true happiness that we truly seek.

And so; I started the day with a kiss to Kanon's lips.

- end.