I don't own Codename: Kids Next Door. I do own James Uno, Kookaburra Beatles, Benny Gilligan, Allison Lincoln, and Jeh Lincoln. Also, this can be considered a slight au, depending on whether G:Knd happened or not.
And this is a one-shot. And my first KND fanfic. So enjoy.
"Okay, guys. We've practiced this for months. Let's see if we can nail it."
A group of five five-year-olds were huddled up in a little corner in a bedroom. One was a brunette boy with the bangs hanging from one side of his head. He wore a red T-shirt with a stripe in the middle and white undershirt, dirty brown shorts and light brown shoes. Black sunglasses sat on his little nose.
The other was a blonde girl with her hair tied in pigtails, decorated in red bows. She wore a yellow T-shirt and blue overalls, yellow socks and white Mary Jane's.
The other was a chubby little boy with a brown cap. He wore a white shirt with brown pants held up by dark blue suspenders and white and black shoes.
The other two were African-Americans. One was a female, the other a male. The girl wore a sky blue shirt and white sneakers. And the boy wore a light blue shirt, a green vest, blue denim jeans and brown boots.
"So, does everyone know what to do? I'm lookin' at you, Kookaburra." James said, eying the young blonde.
"Okie-dokie, mister blokie!" the young girl, Kookaburra, said happily with a salute.
"How do you think the parents, plus uncle and aunt, are gonna react to this, Jeh?" the African-American girl said to her brother. "I bet they'll be shockified."
"I think they'll be impressed." The boy, Jeh, said.
"I just hope they don't scream." The chubby boy said.
"Chill out, Benny. They'll love it." The African-American said.
"That's enough, Jeh, Benny, Allison." The brunette boy said. "Now, Dad and the others just got back from their daily adult-y hangout, so we'll surprise them at the living room. So you ready?"
The four other kids nodded.
"Then action stations!"
…
30-year-old Nigel Uno was lounging on an armchair in the living room, drinking his coffee. On the couch, Wallabee Beatles and Hoagie P. Gilligan were just lounging around, with Wallabee sleeping and Hoagie reading the news papers about raised taxes and the banning of kids shows that made fun of adults. Abigail Lincoln and Kuki Sanban were in the kitchen, doing dishes.
For any Kids Next Door operative of the past, it would be a tragic sight to see. The once famous team Sector V, who would fight to free kids from doing math eleventy-billion hours a day, or fight a kajillion knightamatons to steal a cake from some evil adult-loving prissy children and share it with every child, have been decommissioned and became the one thing ever KND operative, even themselves, despised the most. Adults.
They had no memory of their glorious KND days, the times they'd kick the butts of a man of flames and his creepy, well-behaved, hiveminded children.
Or did they?
While the three men were lounging around, five familiar voices echoed the living room.
"Salutations, everyone. How are you on this lovely afternoon?"
Immediately, Hoagie screamed in terror, waking Wallabee up in a jolt. The Aussie made some karate chop actions, shouting "Lemme at 'em! Lemme at 'em!" and accidently knocking Hoagie over. Nigel had stood up on the chair and was giving out orders.
"Man the fort! Numbuh 5, I need you on defense system, Numbuh 4, frontal attack. Numbuh 3, H.I.P.P.I.E.-H.O.P., NOW!"
"Now hold on a second!" Numbuh 5 said as she entered the living room. What's all the ruckus about?"
"They're back, Abby! They're BACK!" Hoagie screamed.
"Who's back?" Kuki asked as she entered the room.
"We heard them, we really did!" Nigel cried. "I'd recognize their creepy, synchronized talk from any-"
"Dad? Is everything alright?" James asked. He and his friends entered the living room with looks of confusion and amusement.
"James!" Nigel cried. "You gotta get outta here, they're coming and they-"
"Huh? Whatcha' talkin' 'bout?" James questioned. "And who's 'they'?"
Abby, who had quickly realized what the men were freaked out about, decided to discover the real truth. "Nigel, are you sure you heard them?" she asked.
"I know I did!" Nigel said.
"I heard them too!" Hoagie said. "No one else can speak in a perfectly yet creepy synchronized voice-"
"Like this?" James, Kookaburra, Benny, Allison, and Jeh said in perfect unison.
Immediately all the adults' jaws dropped open. Nigel's, Hoagie's, and Kuki's glasses slid down their noses.
Abby was the first to speak. "Kids." She said. "Did you learn to talk in sync by yourselves?"
"Pretty much, Aunt Abby." Jeh answered.
"It took months to perfect, but it was worth it!" Allison answered.
"Sorry if we scared you." Benny said.
"But daddy's and the other guys' reactions were funny!" Kookaburra said.
"Your reactions were a little different than what we expected, but funny otherwise." James said. "But we do have one question-"
"-Who's they?" the children spoke, once again in perfect synchronization.
A moment of silence was in the air. The adults' expressions varied. For Nigel, Hoagie, and Wallabee, it was embarrassment. For Kuki, it was a dull, neutral stare. For Abby, she was processing the whole thing.
Finally, Abby spoke.
"'They' are nothing of concern. Your daddies and uncle were being silly. And I am impressed that you managed to pull off such a feat. Just don't do it again." She said.
"Yes, ma'am." They said yet again in unison. Abby playfully rolled her eyes.
"Now go along and play." She said. James and his pals left the living room.
Kuki stared on with a nonchalant look. "Kids." She said.
"You know, they did it pretty well." Hoagie said. "We really fell for it hook, line, and sync-er. HA HA-OW!"
"You and your bad puns!" Abby said, waving her cap. "After all these years, you still makin' 'em! One more dumb joke outta you and I'll-" she ranted as she chased Hoagie around the household, intended on giving him a good hat whacking.
"Oi'm just glad they ain't around." Wallabee said. "If they ever think about layin' one of their well-washed hands on moi little girl, oi'll kick their adult-lovin', prissy little clocks to Canada!"
Nigel just sighed and sat back down on the chair, relieved the whole thing was cleared up.
But like any little child, even if a grown-up says it's nothing, the little child will still have this 'nothing' in their innocent little minds. This was the same for 5 little children as one question dwelled in their minds.
Who were they?
End Transmission.
So yeah. That was my little one-shot. I hope you enjoyed it. Now allow me to clear up the relations.
James Uno is Nigel's son.
Kookaburra Beatles is the daughter of Wallabee and Kuki Beatles.
Benny Gilligan is Tommy's son. This makes him Hoagie's and Abby's nephew on the Gilligan side.
Allison and Jeh Lincoln are Cree's children, making them Abby's and Hoagie's nephew and niece on the Lincoln side (if you wanna know where the name Jeh came from, look at Warburtonlabs to find out.)
And we all know who 'they' are.
Cartoonlovah101 signing off!
