In the Living Years

This story has vague tie ins to my story Letters, but can be read alone. Also, for lack of detailed knowledge about Gatchaman II and F, I am treating things as if the show ended afer Gatch I...with a few minor modifications.

Disclaimer: Gatchaman belongs to Tatsunoko Productions and ADV. The song 'The Living Years' belongs to Mike and the Mechanics.

The ever present wind of this place blew Ken's long hair across his face as he walked up the hill and stopped at a familiar stone. He knelt in front of it to trace a finger over the familiar markings, something he did at each visit that brought a measure of comfort and connection to him, before taking a seat next to it and setting his burden at his side, shielding it from the wind. Another gust played with his hair and stole the words from his mouth as he spoke, "Chichi-ue."

Every generation

Blames the one before

And all of their frustrations

Come beating on your door

"I'm sorry that it's been a while since I came here. There's been so much happening these last few months that the time has flown by. Joe's finally recovered from the injuries he received in that last battle; for a long time we weren't sure that he'd make it, between how bad they were and how long it took us o find him after the base was destroyed. But you know Joe, he made a complete recovery in record time, just to piss the doctors off. Jinpei's been spending a lot of time with Ryu at his father's house. Ryu's trying to reconnect with his family but I think he's having a harder time than he's willing to admit; there's just so much that he can't tell them and it's been a long time since he left home to join the team. It makes me think about how you must have felt for so long, being unable to tell me that you were alive. I hope that Ryu can find a way.

I know that I'm a prisoner

To all my Father held so dear

I know that I"m a hostage

To all his hopes and fears

I just wish I could have told him in the living years.

"You know Chichi-ue, for a long time, I tried to hate you for leaving us. Haha-ue missed you so much and she was so sad without you. But when I started training for the team, I began o understand a little bit of what you did, why you felt you had to go on that mission. That's when I started wondering if you were still alive somewhere, especially after Hakase slipped a few times when he talked about you, using the present tense instead of the past. He didn't think I caught it, but I did. And I wondered.

Crumpled bits of paper

Filled with imperfect thought

Stilted conversations

I'm afraid that's all we've got

Ken's head tilted downwards in thought, ""When we first met on that mission, I thought you were the cockiest son of a bitch I'd ever met, and after knowing Joe for so long, that was a stretch. God, you pissed me off! You did that a lot and it took me a while to realize that you were doing it on purpose, that it was your way of motivating me to do better. I hate to admit it, bu it worked. I worked myself harder just so I could rub it in your face when I succeeded, so you couldn't call me a child anymore."

You say that you don't see it

He says it's perfect sense

You just can't get agreement

In this present tense

We all talk a different language

Talking in defense

He chuffed out a breath, "A child! God, the times you called me that. You called me that so many times, but the worst time was when I thought I'd lost Jun. You kicked my ass that night and though I hate to admit it, I did see your point. I just didn't care at the time. I never thanked you for that; once she was back with us, and I thought back to our conversation, if you can call it that, I was too irritated that you'd beaten me so thoroughly, like I was a little kid...like a child."

Say it loud, say it clear

You can listen as well as you hear

It's too late when we die

To admit we don't see eye to eye

"It took me a long time to figure out that you were doing the same thing that Joe often does to Jinpei. He calls it tough love and I guess he's right. The things you taught me saved my hide on more than one occasion and I don't think I ever thanked you for that either."

So we open up a quarrel

Between the present and the past

We only sacrifice the future

It's the bitterness that lasts

"The times we worked together on missions were the times I got to know you best and I think that's when I finally, truly, forgave you for leaving. I saw how much you, as Red Impulse, regretted leaving your wife and child and I realized that my father, wherever he was, probably felt the same way. I'd heard too much from Hakase about how he'd been so devoted to my mother and I to think that he's just wanted to get away from the responsibility of a family. And that didn't change when Jun told me that you were in fact my father. I just wish we'd had more time together."

So don't yield to the fortunes

You sometimes see as Fate.

It may have a new perspective

On a different day

And if you don't give up, don't give in

You may just be OK

Ken sighed, "For a long time, I wondered if I was supposed to get through the war alive, or if I would do as you did and die trying o stop Galactor. I made some stupid decisions and put the team in danger. When Jun finally chewed me out for it, I could almost hear your voice scolding me for acting like a child again. I sometimes wonder if she worded what she said like that deliberately...but either way, it worked. I have to admit, when everything ended, I was somewhat afraid; what did I know about a normal life? None of us had what you could call 'normal' lives, even before we joined the team. And as much as I wanted to be with Jun, what did I know about being a husband? Or a father?

Say it loud, say it clear

You can listen as well as you hear

It's too late when we die

To admit we don't see eye to eye

He laughed softly, "A silly question, I suppose. I didn't know jack. But the last year has definitely been what you could call a learning experience. When Jun came down the aisle at our wedding, she looked so beautiful Chichi-ue. I couldn't believe it was finally happening. I wish you could have been there to see it. Joe grumbled all day about being stuffed into a penguin suit and Hakase looked as if he couldn't decide if he should hug me or kill me for stealing his little girl away. I'm sure I'll be just as bad someday. Jinpei and Ryu were full of advice but what I wouldn't have given to have you there to laugh at me for being such a nervous wreck..."

I wasn't there that morning

When my father passed away

I didn't get to tell him

All the things I had to say

A soft cry distracted Ken from his one sided conversation and he smiled down at the baby in the carrier next to him. Lifting his infant son out of the carrier, he held him carefully against his chest, shielding him from the wind as he continued, "But I think I understand you now chichi-ue. I finally understand. Thank you."

I think I caught his spirit

Later that same year

I'm sure I heard his echo

In my baby's newborn tears

I just wish I could have told him in the living years

A cooing sound from the baby brought a smile to the young father's face as he turned to kneel in front of the stone once more. The wind that had been playing with his hair earlier had died down to a breeze that just stirred the wisps of downy mahogany hair on the baby's head. "Chichi-ue, I want you to meet your grandson, Kentaro Kozaburo Washio. He's three weeks old and he has his mother's eyes. Hakase says he already has your temper. I have to thank you again Chichi-ue. That letter you left for me...you were right. I used to think that caring about anyone was like giving them a death sentence, that it was a weakness. But you were right; I've never felt that I could do anything I needed to more than I do now. I can't believe I came so close o giving up on this. I can't say I always make the right decisions, but I hope that you'd be proud of me."Say it loud, say it clear

You can listen as well as you hear

It's too late when we die

To admit we don' see eye to eye.

Another coo from the baby had Ken smiling and rising to his feet, "I hate to say, but I should go. Jun will kill me if he catches cold. I'll bring her with me the next time. Sayonara Chichi-ue."

Ken settled his son back into his carrier and made his way back down to his car. As he strapped the carrier into the rear seat, he spoke to his son, "Someday Kentaro, I'll tell you the story of the brave pilot and his two friends who fought with Gatchaman against Galactor. He sacrificed a great deal, but in the end he saved the world."

The baby blinked wide green eyes at his father and cooed, causing him to laugh as he gently closed the car door. A strong gust of wind blew his hair across his face once more before he settled into the seat and drove away. And as it blew, it seemed to whisper.

"I am proud of you, my son."

The End