The Bitter Taste of Jealousy
Spoilers: Jitters
Disclaimer: I don't own 'em, though that would be very yummy. All credit for creating these characters belongs with the comic people and the WB.
Feedback: If you've got it, give it. I take all criticism and praise as constructive, unless you are really rude, in which case, bite me ahead of time.
This is my first fanfic. It all stems from one, lonely, bitter, jealous, hopeful look.
__________________________________________________________
A look said it all, yet didn't say nearly enough.
*I want that.*
The longing, the ever-present hope, that someday his father, hell, someone, would look at him the same way, hug him the same way, without an ulterior motive.
*I need that.*
The anger and bitter recognition that such hopes were futile, childish fantasies. His father had destroyed that dream at every turn, beaten down his hope and built up his anger.
*Without that I am lost.*
He has tried. Oh he has tried. To become what his father is not. To hope that someday, someone will see. And care. That he is not the man his father is, but his own man. A better man.
*Someone please save me.*
But all they see is who he trys not to be. Who he is has always been is perceived to be part of a Luthor whole. Like father, like son. No matter that he is not. He is so much more, deserves so much more than what his father gives him. He deserves the hugs, the comfort, the worry, the caring of others.
*I can't save myself.*
So he's not perfect. Even the stereotypical good little farmboy isn't perfect. Love shouldn't be based on job performance, or perfection. He of all people knows that. Otherwise, why strive to please someone who criticizes you at every turn? Be better, be more. If you can't be the perfect farmboy that everyone loves, be your father's perfect son, who he'll respect. Bow down to.
*Maybe I'll be the savior.*
He deserves more. So much more. And if his father won't give it to him, then he'll take it. From wherever he can get it. No, he is not his father. He's so, so much more.
End
Spoilers: Jitters
Disclaimer: I don't own 'em, though that would be very yummy. All credit for creating these characters belongs with the comic people and the WB.
Feedback: If you've got it, give it. I take all criticism and praise as constructive, unless you are really rude, in which case, bite me ahead of time.
This is my first fanfic. It all stems from one, lonely, bitter, jealous, hopeful look.
__________________________________________________________
A look said it all, yet didn't say nearly enough.
*I want that.*
The longing, the ever-present hope, that someday his father, hell, someone, would look at him the same way, hug him the same way, without an ulterior motive.
*I need that.*
The anger and bitter recognition that such hopes were futile, childish fantasies. His father had destroyed that dream at every turn, beaten down his hope and built up his anger.
*Without that I am lost.*
He has tried. Oh he has tried. To become what his father is not. To hope that someday, someone will see. And care. That he is not the man his father is, but his own man. A better man.
*Someone please save me.*
But all they see is who he trys not to be. Who he is has always been is perceived to be part of a Luthor whole. Like father, like son. No matter that he is not. He is so much more, deserves so much more than what his father gives him. He deserves the hugs, the comfort, the worry, the caring of others.
*I can't save myself.*
So he's not perfect. Even the stereotypical good little farmboy isn't perfect. Love shouldn't be based on job performance, or perfection. He of all people knows that. Otherwise, why strive to please someone who criticizes you at every turn? Be better, be more. If you can't be the perfect farmboy that everyone loves, be your father's perfect son, who he'll respect. Bow down to.
*Maybe I'll be the savior.*
He deserves more. So much more. And if his father won't give it to him, then he'll take it. From wherever he can get it. No, he is not his father. He's so, so much more.
End
