Among the Rubble
Author's Notes: The usual disclaimers apply here. The GW characters, in particular Zechs, don't belong to me. The Malloy family are totally my own creation. These two stories were the first in a series, which take place after the final episode of Gundam Wing, and before 'Endless Waltz.' and chronicle what happened to Zechs in that year.
It began, as it sometimes will, perfectly innocently. Talia and Shawn Malloy were scavengers, flying through space in their own piece of junk, trying to scavenge enough spare parts from dead ships to keep their own vessel in working order. And while neither Talia nor Shawn believed in war, neither could deny that with the massive destruction of the most recent war was beneficial to them.
And the destruction of the Libra could keep them in spare parts for several years. To be quite crude about it, it was the equivalent of hitting the lottery. Sure, not all parts would be salvageable, but that wasn't the point. They would finally be able to stop being scavengers. The couple debated long and hard about whether or not they would go to the site of the rubble field, just outside the Earth's atmosphere.
But a scant day after the climactic final battle, the husband and wife journeyed to the rubble field. One never knew what might be found floating around in space. During the years she knew Shawn Malloy and his twelve year old daughter Ciara, Talia found the most amazing things. But this run would prove the most extraordinary of all.
As Talia cut the engines, Shawn murmurered, "Now this can't be right. I was watching the final battle between the two Gundams, as well as the explosion of that last block. Nothing should have even remained intact." Talia satisfied herself that the engines were no longer running, then went to her husband's side. Ciara was asleep, would probably sleep for another few hours. It was just them for right now.
"What do you have?" she inquired, putting her hand on his shoulder, then glanced at the display which held his rapt attention. She scanned the information which was scrolling across, and her eyes widened. She looked at him and said, "That's impossible."
"I know. . .I know. But according to this, there's a life form inside that thing. Tal, we have to get whoever it is. The battle was yesterday, and the life support is probably dwindling," Shawn said, turning to look at her. The young woman rolled her eyes. She was thirty, but there were times when Shawn still thought she was the teenaged girl he and his first wife Elene rescued thirteen years earlier. However, she didn't comment on it. It wasn't worth her energy.
"I agree. . .but we have to be careful. That thing isn't even a full Gundam, and it's big. What about the Mech Suits we rebuilt? It has enough oxygen for one person to make the trip, and whoever remains can reel both back in," Talia observed. She and Shawn found spare parts from destroyed Mobile Dolls during this last war, and built their own Mech Suits, for the more delicate parts of their job. Like hooking up the torso of a Gundam and bringing it inside the ship, although this would be a first for the husband and wife.
"All right, I'll go," Shawn said. Talia started to protest, and Shawn reminded her, "You're better with the controls than I am. If you stay here, we all have a better chance for survival. I'll hook the cables to what's left of that, and you can reel it in. Besides, Ciara may be my daughter, but she seems more secure with you right now."
Talia fell silent, conceding this point. But her silence lasted only a moment, as she added, "Be careful, Shawn. Ciara still needs you. She's already lost one parent. . .it would destroy her if she lost you as well." Talia lost both parents. She knew what she was talking about. Shawn just smiled fondly and kissed her forehead. She could have been his sister, rather than his wife. But Talia was used to it.
"I know," he replied, "but right now, that kid, whoever he is, needs help. I'll raise you on the com system if I need help." Talia had a pretty good idea who was in that suit. . .she followed the various factions during the course of the war, saw the shifting allegiances, if only in the changes in design. She knew the players.
Shawn smiled at her one more time, then strode to the cargo hold, where the Mech Suits were kept. Talia stared after him for a moment, then turned her attention back to her work. The display told her that the Gundam pilot was still alive, though just barely. The vital signs were steadily getting weaker. It occurred to her that she should make sure the med-kit was out. There was no telling how severe his injuries were.
"Mom? Why's Daddy going to the hold?" Ciara asked, entering the cockpit. The girl gaped when she saw the torso of the Gundam. She looked at Talia, then at the Gundam, then back at Talia. She said, "Mom, that's a Gundam. The Gundam in the battle yesterday, I was watching it on the monitor, the one which didn't come out when the Libra exploded!" Talia went to her step-daughter and put both arms around her.
"I know, honey. Listen, I didn't think you would be up for another few hours, but since you are. . .why don't you help me by finding the med- kit? We don't know how badly he was injured when the Libra blew up," she suggested, kissing the girl's soft hair. It was neither brown nor blonde, but a mixture between. Just like her parents. . .or rather, she had a mixture of her father's eyes and her mother's fair hair, though Ciara's hair was somewhat darker than Elene's.
"Okay. . .and when Daddy gets the Gundam aboard, I can make up one of the cabins for him. Mom, it's him, isn't it? Zechs Merquis?" Ciara asked, her blue-gray eyes lighting up. The young leader of the White Fang was an endless source of fascination for the twelve year old, especially since he wasn't so much older than she was.
"I don't know, baby. I just don't know. Listen, while you're getting the med-kit, I have to get ready to operate the controls. Remember, the Gundam pilots don't wear helmuts inside the Gundams. So we'll tow the Gundam inside," Talia said. The girl nodded and bounded from the room, leaving the young woman with the sense that their lives just got a lot more complicated.
However, her life was always complicated. Why should things be any different now? She shook her head and turned her attention back to the monitor. The pilot, whoever he was, was in trouble. And she was taught when she was a child, when someone helped you, you passed it on. Talia grimaced, remembering her childhood. Her teen years. Petyr. She shook her head. No, she wouldn't think about that right now. Concentrate on this pilot.
. . .
As salvage missions went, it was among the easier ones Shawn attempted. After he suited up and left the ship, his wife kept a gentle hand on the controls of the cable which kept him attached to the ship. Shawn drifted toward the Gundam. The arms and legs were blown off, leaving only the giant torso of the Gundam floating in space.
Shawn came prepared. If necessary, he could weld handles into the damaged hull of the giant torso, handles for the cable. But it proved un- necessary, as there were natural hand-grips, probably for the pilots. Shawn easily looped the cables through the grips, latching them onto the metal. Once Talia began operating the controls, both Shawn and the Gundam would be towed back into the salvage ship.
He peered into the ship. . .as he feared, the pilot was knocked unconscious before he had a chance to put on his helmut. He looked to be about eighteen or nineteen, twenty at most. Shawn, who was thirty-five, was shaken to realize this boy could be his son or nephew. Just a child, and fighting a war for God only knew what reason. Why was there ever war? The Ireland of his ancestors, of his own childhood, was torn apart by war and conflict, and for what?
Shawn keyed the mike in his suit, telling his wife, "Cables are fastened, and I'm holding onto the grips. Get us back on board. Once we get the kid out, and into his own cabin, we'll strip this thing for parts, and blow the rest of it up. I have a feeling leaving that thing out here would be a mistake. Too many crazies running around. Never mind that the war is over, there are still too many crazies."
"Agreed. Ciara is getting out the med-kit out for the pilot. How is he doing?" Talia asked as Shawn and the Gundam were pulled back to the ship. The pilot remained limp in the cockpit, and it occurred to Shawn that the boy might be dead. His blood ran cold, but he shook off his fear. No, the boy was alive. He had to be. They hadn't just expended all this energy, just to rescue a dead man.
"Unconscious. . .I hope. He hasn't stirred," Shawn answered. They were nearing the salvage vessel now, and he added, "Almost there. I'll get the Gundam in first, and close the door behind me." Shawn reached for the hold of the ship, maneuvering the Gundam torso inside, then pulled himself in. He hit the button which closed the door, as promised.
Now came the delayed claustrophobic fit, as Shawn began to feel the walls closing in on him. He took several deep breaths, trying to calm himself in the delayed panic attack. His heart was racing, it was hard to breathe, but Shawn forced himself to calm down. The kid, whoever he was, still needed their help. And Talia would need help getting him to one of their cabins, even though Ciara was awake.
He began deactivating the heavy Mech Suit. A half second later, Talia was in the hold with him with the med-kit in her hand, and said, "I put the ship on auto-pilot." Shawn nodded and got out of his Mech Suit, while his wife crawled onto the torso of the Gundam and shimmied open the door. Once it was open, Talia lowered herself into the cockpit.
Once he was free of that damn suit of his own, Shawn crawled up onto the torso, and held his arms out. Talia was unbuckling the boy from his restraints, and for the first time, Shawn saw the blood trickling from the corner of the boy's lip. Shawn's insides turned to ice. The kid had internal injuries. This didn't look good. He didn't know why it was so important to him that this boy lived. . .but it was important. It was damned important.
Talia gently lifted the pilot from the seat and Shawn reached down for the unconscious boy. He got his hands under the youngster's arms and lifted him from the cockpit, with Talia guiding his legs. Once Shawn had the boy out on the torso, Talia pulled herself out of the cockpit, and she said breathlessly, "I'll lower him to the ground from here."
Shawn nodded and slid to the ground, barely aware that his daughter had entered the hold and was now watching them curiously. Talia sat down beside the unconscious pilot, then drew him into her arms, his head resting against her shoulder. She dug in her heels and propelled them both down the Gundam. Shawn caught the injured boy, lowering him to the ground, and Talia landed on her feet easily. Like a damn cat she was, but there was only affection in the observation.
"Here's the med-kit, Mom," Ciara offered as Talia began to pull the protective suit away from their guest. Shawn lowered his head gently to the ground, and Talia held her hand out for the med-kit. Ciara handed it to her, then sank to her knees beside the pilot. She looked up, her eyes shining. There was more than a touch of hero worship in her face.
It occurred to him, not for the first time, that his little girl was growing up. She would be thirteen in six months. . .and dammit, she was starting to notice boys. Worse yet, she developed a monumental crush on the leader of the White Fang, a boy not even out of his teens yet. He was handsome and mysterious. . .definitely someone to appeal to a young girl like Ciara.
But that wasn't the responsibility of the young man. Zechs Merquis, Miliardo Peacecraft, whatever name he used. . .he needed their help. Shawn could only hope that his daughter had enough wisdom to understand that. Then again, Talia helped him to raise Ciara, even before their marriage. He should have more faith in them both.
. . .
Talia had no idea what kind of injuries the Gundam pilot had suffered when his Gundam was so badly damaged, although the blood trickling from his mouth told her that there were some internal injuries. Her heart turned over, seeing for the first time just how young he was. Oh, she knew how many years he lived as soon as she saw his face. She knew quite a lot about Miliardo Peacecraft. But until now, it hadn't struck her how young he was.
//Nineteen or twenty,// she thought as she gently caressed the long blond hair back from his forehead, //the same age as Petyr. My little brother.// The comparison was not a reassuring one, as the pilot's eyes were still closed, and his breathing labored. Talia closed her eyes, remembering her brother. Killed in the same war which resulted in the death of King Peacecraft of the Sank Kingdom.
And the father of the boy now lying on the floor of Talia's vessel. She said softly, "Miliardo Peacecraft. . .Zechs Merquis." As she suspected. Ciara's pale eyes were shining with excitement. She was right as well. Shawn was silent, quite possibly knowing what she was thinking, and Talia said, "Well, I should get this off him, so I at least know if I can save him." She began easing the space suit from his body. She took her time, knowing that it might mean his death if she rushed him out of the suit, if she moved too quickly in any way.
Once that was done, she passed her diagnostic over him, murmuring, "Broken ribs, bruised muscles. Can't tell if he's bleeding internally yet, so we need to be careful when we move him." She was talking more to herself than anyone else. Talia waved the diagnostic around his head, grimacing, and muttered, "Looks like he took a severe blow to his head. Probably knocked the back of his head against the chair when the Gundam took the big blast."
For the first time, she noticed that his lips were turning blue. Frowning, the young woman moved the diagnostic back over his chest, and nodded grimly. She was afraid of that and told Shawn, "One of his broken lungs punctured his lung, I think. His lung hasn't collapsed yet, but we have to hurry. Hand me the oxygen mask. Ciara, honey, I need you to get all of our med equipment set up in the cabin you made up for him." Ciara nodded and jumped to her feet, then ran from the cargo hold. Talia was vaguely aware that the parts they could get from the Gundam would keep them in parts for several years.
Talia turned her attention back to the unconscious pilot. God, but he was so young! With everything which happened in the last year, it was hard to believe that Zechs Merquis. . . Miliardo Peacecraft. . .was only nineteen years old. His sister Relena was only fifteen, the ruler of the Sank kingdom. It all made Talia feel very old, until she remembered what happened when she was sixteen years old.
The fall of the Sank Kingdom, the beginning of her nightmare. That same nightmare created this young man as well. The teenaged Talia ceased to exist on the same day Zechs Merquise replaced Miliardo Peacecraft, small prince of the Sank Kingdom. They took different paths, to erase the nightmares, but somehow, they ended up in the same place. Talia decided she would think about that later. She had to concentrate on the now. But it wasn't that easy.
As she gently placed the oxygen mask over the boy's face, she gently stroked the blond hair back from his eyes. If she were to close her own eyes, she could almost pretend that her little brother was still alive. Almost. But her brother was dead for many years. Nothing could bring him back. She had to remember that, and help this boy. He had a sister as well, and she would need him. Talia was no psychic, couldn't see the future. But she didn't need to.
Once she was satisfied that further moving their unexpected guest wouldn't cause more damage to his already battered body, Talia said softly, "We need to get him to the cabin. I'll stay with him." Shawn started to protest, and Talia smiled at him, saying softly, "You're the better pilot, and I'm the better medic. We can switch roles another time."
Shawn closed his mouth with a snap and replied, "You're absolutely right. I'm sorry. I'll take his feet, you take his shoulders." Talia bobbed her head, smiling, and gently slid her hands under the boy's shoulders. His head fell lightly against her arm as they picked him up. Once more, Talia was reminded of her lost brother. He died in her arms, his small lifeless body cradled against her own thin, all too fragile body. Talia forced the memories back. She would have to face them later, but for now. . .for now, she would see to this child.
. . .
Despite the steps taken by the husband and wife, as well as young Ciara, it was almost a week before they were somewhat positive Zechs Merquis would live. He was weaker than they originally feared. His injuries were only part of the equation. The morning after his rescue, he developed a high fever. That week was spent in a vigil at his side for Talia, while Shawn piloted their craft. She ate and slept, since Ciara would spell her at their patient's side. But she only left the boy's side to eat and sleep, and attend to other bodily functions.
Shawn admitted that the boy seemed more willing to fight while Talia was there, for reasons neither of them understood. Any more than they understood his seeming desire to die. He just lay on the bed, usually unconscious. When he was conscious, it was only for a few moments, and he was delirious. Often, he cried. Crying, begging, for his sister to forgive him. . .but someone had to atone for the weakness, the sins, of humanity. For the incessant wars to end, a sacrifice had to be made. And if it took such a terrible cost, so be it. If people despised his name from the end of time, if it ended war. . .it was necessary.
"But you're just a boy," Talia whispered after one such confession, "just a child. How can you, one mere boy, atone for so many?" She shook her head, gently stroked his hair back from his forehead, and that quieted him. He spoke of others. . .but most of his conversations, most of his words, were for his beloved little sister. As the days passed and Zechs hovered between life and death, Talia faced her brother's death and the end of the Sank Kingdom.
And now, things were coming full circle. Either full circle, or she was being given a second chance. Her brother died in her arms when she was sixteen, in part because Petyr and Talia were instructed to protect the prince in any way they could. Would she have the opportunity to save this young man, when she couldn't save her brother? And perhaps, in doing so, earn the forgiveness of her parents?
These questions were put aside, for she needed to concentrate on healing her patient, who daily struggled with his own battles and demons. A week after they found his Gundam floating in a field of rubble, Zechs Merquis awoke. If Talia believed their lives would get interesting before, the weeks which followed his awakening proved her point.
. .
.
He. . .hurt. Which was strange, because he always believed that death would end all pain. But he hurt now. Oh, he hurt. If there was a part of his body which didn't hurt, he didn't know about it. Then he heard a soft, young girl's voice. Relena? The girl said, "Mom, he's waking up. No, I think he's really waking up!"
At that, Zechs Merquise did force his eyes open. He was wrong. He wasn't dead. And despite the whispering in the back of his mind, the girl at his side wasn't his little sister Relena. The girl beamed at him, saying, "It's an honor to have you aboard, Colonel Merquise!" The child. . .perhaps twelve or thirteen years of age, snapped a salute which would have put half of Oz to shame, as well as the majority of White Fang.
Zechs started to answer, but blinding pain shot through his torso, robbing him of the ability to speak. Colonel Merquise. He hadn't heard that in a long time. Not long enough, however. A soft hand touched his forehead, caressed his hair, and a voice said, "Easy. . .don't try to talk. We weren't sure if you would make it." Zechs closed his eyes against the pain, forcing himself to relax. . .and slowly, the pain eased.
Once he was reasonably certain he could talk in a low voice without blinding pain, Zechs whispered, "Where am I? Who are you? What happened?" Now the pain began taking over again. But with the pain, with consciousness, came questions. He could only vaguely remember the battle with Heero Yuy. And he remembered he meant to die. So. . .why was he alive?
"You're aboard our salvage ship. It doesn't have a name, it doesn't really need one. My name is Talia Malloy, and this is Ciara. We found you about a week ago, after your Gundam battle," that same soft voice answered. Zechs forced himself to open his eyes, and the woman said, "Ciara, turn down the lights, so they don't hurt our guest's eyes."
"Okay, Mom. Should I tell Daddy that he's awake?" the girl asked. Her mother assented, then the girl, Ciara, ran from the room. With the lights not as bright, Zechs focused on the woman sitting beside him. She looked vaguely familiar, though he couldn't place her. His head hurt, his body hurt, his soul hurt, too much for him to concentrate on where he saw her before. The young woman looked to be about twenty-five or thirty, with curly dark hair and hazel eyes.
She smiled at him and said softly, "We weren't sure you'd pull through. You're as strong-willed as the rest of your family." Zechs blinked. . .she knew of his family? His. . . father? Talia. . .that was her name, wasn't it? Talia? He thought that was what she said. She knew his family? But she said gently, "You look like your father. I'm sure he's very proud of you. Your mother, too."
"I've disappointed them both. My father believed in pacifism, and I became a warrior," Zechs answered, then moaned in pain. He should have died, he wanted to die. He told Heero Yuy that they would met again, because he believed they would on the other side. With Treize. But not now, for Heero was needed to protect Relena. Talia's fingers brushed through his hair, and the pain began to ease once more.
"I seriously doubt that. You did what was necessary to survive, what was necessary to protect your little sister. And you succeeded. For that alone, they're proud of you. No more talking. You were hurt very badly. Just rest for now, and we can talk later. I promise to answer what questions I can. Sleep," she said. Zechs again tried to protest, but Talia repeated, stroking his forehead, "Sleep, my little love. Just sleep." Against his will, Zechs found his eyes closing and the darkness came in and claimed him. In his dreams, he was six years old, before his world fell apart, before his family was destroyed. . .while he was still worthy of love.
. . .
"So how is he?" Shawn asked as he joined his wife and daughter in the galley. Ciara raced to the cockpit, gasping that he was awake, Colonel Zechs was awake. Shawn followed her to the med-cabin, where the young man was once more losing consciousness. But he saw the relief in his wife's eyes, and that was all he needed to know for now.
"Well, like I said, he's damn lucky to be alive. Broken ribs, internal bleeding, a punctured lung. From what I could gather from the information we downloaded from his Gundam before we stripped it and blew it up, he was knocked unconscious in the blast. The explosion blasted him through the ship before the block hit the atmosphere, and Heero Yuy blasted it with that cannon of his," Talia answered, wiping her hands on her slacks.
She paused, then continued, "I also downloaded the voice files, talking to the other pilots and to the White Fang. One of the arms was already taken off during his battle with Heero Yuy. According to what I've heard, some of these Gundam Suits have their own consciousness, their own. . .intelligence."
"So, what you're saying, Mom, is that it protected him? How?" Ciara asked. Shawn looked at his wife questioningly, and Ciara went on, "I mean, when the explosion took place, shouldn't the cockpit have been destroyed? Shouldn't it have been totally destroyed, since he was the one who started the process?"
"You'd think so, yes. But that's where the suit comes in. If the suit does have a consciousness of its own, it's entirely likely that the suit tried to protect him. Think about it. The positioning of your body, or another, at the time of impact decides how badly the impacted body will be injured. The suit may have turned sideways after the initial blast, the one that knocked him unconscious. That way, only the remaining limbs were blasted away, leaving the torso intact," Talia answered.
"And what of the life-support system? Would the suit be able to keep his life support system going, even with the hits it must have taken as it was blow through the ship?" Shawn asked. Talia shrugged. . .none of them really knew that much about Gundam Suits. Shawn was silent for a few moments, then asked his wife, "So what now?"
"I don't know," she admitted with a sigh, leaning back against the cabinets, "I really don't know. I have an uneasy feeling that we'll need to keep a watch on him. While I was talking to him, I had the impression that he felt he didn't deserve to live. Nothing specific that he said, particularly. Just the sadness in his voice when he said that he disappointed his parents. Nothing concrete, no reason. . .just a feeling. But, unless we want our efforts to go to waste, we have to convince him that it's worth it. . .that life is worth it."
"How do we do that, Mom? And why would he want to die?" Ciara asked in puzzlement. Shawn smiled faintly at his daughter, understanding her confusion. She grew up in space, she grew up free, surrounded by people who loved her. Even after the death of her mother, ten years earlier, she was surrounded by love. Advantages denied to Miliardo Peacecraft. . .Zechs Merquise. He and Talia talked a great deal during the last week. About the tragedy which brought her to him and Elene.
"Because, honey, in order to survive, he had to do some terrible things. And he can't forgive himself for that. Remember how he would cry in his sleep, about wanting his sister to forgive him? That's what I mean. But we have to convince him to forgive himself. We have to convince him that life is worth it. . .that he's worth it," Talia answered.
"Which brings us back to the original question. How?" Shawn asked. Talia sighed again. Shawn got the picture. She was as clueless as they were. But Shawn found he was just as determined to keep that young man alive as his wife. His motivations were different than hers, but their ends were the same.
"Ciara, before you were born, I was a lot like that young man. I didn't believe I deserved to live. But your father and mother taught me that the only way a person can atone for what they've done, or failed to do, is by living. And they loved me. It sounds terribly corny. . .but it's true. We convince him to keep living, by loving him," Talia answered.
Shawn considered his wife's words. Love. Could something so simple be so necessary to save the life of a young man? Why not? As Talia said, it was love which saved her when he and Elene found her all those years ago. True, Zechs Merquise was older, and had even more on his soul than that lost little girl had. But it was a place to start.
Author's Notes: The usual disclaimers apply here. The GW characters, in particular Zechs, don't belong to me. The Malloy family are totally my own creation. These two stories were the first in a series, which take place after the final episode of Gundam Wing, and before 'Endless Waltz.' and chronicle what happened to Zechs in that year.
It began, as it sometimes will, perfectly innocently. Talia and Shawn Malloy were scavengers, flying through space in their own piece of junk, trying to scavenge enough spare parts from dead ships to keep their own vessel in working order. And while neither Talia nor Shawn believed in war, neither could deny that with the massive destruction of the most recent war was beneficial to them.
And the destruction of the Libra could keep them in spare parts for several years. To be quite crude about it, it was the equivalent of hitting the lottery. Sure, not all parts would be salvageable, but that wasn't the point. They would finally be able to stop being scavengers. The couple debated long and hard about whether or not they would go to the site of the rubble field, just outside the Earth's atmosphere.
But a scant day after the climactic final battle, the husband and wife journeyed to the rubble field. One never knew what might be found floating around in space. During the years she knew Shawn Malloy and his twelve year old daughter Ciara, Talia found the most amazing things. But this run would prove the most extraordinary of all.
As Talia cut the engines, Shawn murmurered, "Now this can't be right. I was watching the final battle between the two Gundams, as well as the explosion of that last block. Nothing should have even remained intact." Talia satisfied herself that the engines were no longer running, then went to her husband's side. Ciara was asleep, would probably sleep for another few hours. It was just them for right now.
"What do you have?" she inquired, putting her hand on his shoulder, then glanced at the display which held his rapt attention. She scanned the information which was scrolling across, and her eyes widened. She looked at him and said, "That's impossible."
"I know. . .I know. But according to this, there's a life form inside that thing. Tal, we have to get whoever it is. The battle was yesterday, and the life support is probably dwindling," Shawn said, turning to look at her. The young woman rolled her eyes. She was thirty, but there were times when Shawn still thought she was the teenaged girl he and his first wife Elene rescued thirteen years earlier. However, she didn't comment on it. It wasn't worth her energy.
"I agree. . .but we have to be careful. That thing isn't even a full Gundam, and it's big. What about the Mech Suits we rebuilt? It has enough oxygen for one person to make the trip, and whoever remains can reel both back in," Talia observed. She and Shawn found spare parts from destroyed Mobile Dolls during this last war, and built their own Mech Suits, for the more delicate parts of their job. Like hooking up the torso of a Gundam and bringing it inside the ship, although this would be a first for the husband and wife.
"All right, I'll go," Shawn said. Talia started to protest, and Shawn reminded her, "You're better with the controls than I am. If you stay here, we all have a better chance for survival. I'll hook the cables to what's left of that, and you can reel it in. Besides, Ciara may be my daughter, but she seems more secure with you right now."
Talia fell silent, conceding this point. But her silence lasted only a moment, as she added, "Be careful, Shawn. Ciara still needs you. She's already lost one parent. . .it would destroy her if she lost you as well." Talia lost both parents. She knew what she was talking about. Shawn just smiled fondly and kissed her forehead. She could have been his sister, rather than his wife. But Talia was used to it.
"I know," he replied, "but right now, that kid, whoever he is, needs help. I'll raise you on the com system if I need help." Talia had a pretty good idea who was in that suit. . .she followed the various factions during the course of the war, saw the shifting allegiances, if only in the changes in design. She knew the players.
Shawn smiled at her one more time, then strode to the cargo hold, where the Mech Suits were kept. Talia stared after him for a moment, then turned her attention back to her work. The display told her that the Gundam pilot was still alive, though just barely. The vital signs were steadily getting weaker. It occurred to her that she should make sure the med-kit was out. There was no telling how severe his injuries were.
"Mom? Why's Daddy going to the hold?" Ciara asked, entering the cockpit. The girl gaped when she saw the torso of the Gundam. She looked at Talia, then at the Gundam, then back at Talia. She said, "Mom, that's a Gundam. The Gundam in the battle yesterday, I was watching it on the monitor, the one which didn't come out when the Libra exploded!" Talia went to her step-daughter and put both arms around her.
"I know, honey. Listen, I didn't think you would be up for another few hours, but since you are. . .why don't you help me by finding the med- kit? We don't know how badly he was injured when the Libra blew up," she suggested, kissing the girl's soft hair. It was neither brown nor blonde, but a mixture between. Just like her parents. . .or rather, she had a mixture of her father's eyes and her mother's fair hair, though Ciara's hair was somewhat darker than Elene's.
"Okay. . .and when Daddy gets the Gundam aboard, I can make up one of the cabins for him. Mom, it's him, isn't it? Zechs Merquis?" Ciara asked, her blue-gray eyes lighting up. The young leader of the White Fang was an endless source of fascination for the twelve year old, especially since he wasn't so much older than she was.
"I don't know, baby. I just don't know. Listen, while you're getting the med-kit, I have to get ready to operate the controls. Remember, the Gundam pilots don't wear helmuts inside the Gundams. So we'll tow the Gundam inside," Talia said. The girl nodded and bounded from the room, leaving the young woman with the sense that their lives just got a lot more complicated.
However, her life was always complicated. Why should things be any different now? She shook her head and turned her attention back to the monitor. The pilot, whoever he was, was in trouble. And she was taught when she was a child, when someone helped you, you passed it on. Talia grimaced, remembering her childhood. Her teen years. Petyr. She shook her head. No, she wouldn't think about that right now. Concentrate on this pilot.
. . .
As salvage missions went, it was among the easier ones Shawn attempted. After he suited up and left the ship, his wife kept a gentle hand on the controls of the cable which kept him attached to the ship. Shawn drifted toward the Gundam. The arms and legs were blown off, leaving only the giant torso of the Gundam floating in space.
Shawn came prepared. If necessary, he could weld handles into the damaged hull of the giant torso, handles for the cable. But it proved un- necessary, as there were natural hand-grips, probably for the pilots. Shawn easily looped the cables through the grips, latching them onto the metal. Once Talia began operating the controls, both Shawn and the Gundam would be towed back into the salvage ship.
He peered into the ship. . .as he feared, the pilot was knocked unconscious before he had a chance to put on his helmut. He looked to be about eighteen or nineteen, twenty at most. Shawn, who was thirty-five, was shaken to realize this boy could be his son or nephew. Just a child, and fighting a war for God only knew what reason. Why was there ever war? The Ireland of his ancestors, of his own childhood, was torn apart by war and conflict, and for what?
Shawn keyed the mike in his suit, telling his wife, "Cables are fastened, and I'm holding onto the grips. Get us back on board. Once we get the kid out, and into his own cabin, we'll strip this thing for parts, and blow the rest of it up. I have a feeling leaving that thing out here would be a mistake. Too many crazies running around. Never mind that the war is over, there are still too many crazies."
"Agreed. Ciara is getting out the med-kit out for the pilot. How is he doing?" Talia asked as Shawn and the Gundam were pulled back to the ship. The pilot remained limp in the cockpit, and it occurred to Shawn that the boy might be dead. His blood ran cold, but he shook off his fear. No, the boy was alive. He had to be. They hadn't just expended all this energy, just to rescue a dead man.
"Unconscious. . .I hope. He hasn't stirred," Shawn answered. They were nearing the salvage vessel now, and he added, "Almost there. I'll get the Gundam in first, and close the door behind me." Shawn reached for the hold of the ship, maneuvering the Gundam torso inside, then pulled himself in. He hit the button which closed the door, as promised.
Now came the delayed claustrophobic fit, as Shawn began to feel the walls closing in on him. He took several deep breaths, trying to calm himself in the delayed panic attack. His heart was racing, it was hard to breathe, but Shawn forced himself to calm down. The kid, whoever he was, still needed their help. And Talia would need help getting him to one of their cabins, even though Ciara was awake.
He began deactivating the heavy Mech Suit. A half second later, Talia was in the hold with him with the med-kit in her hand, and said, "I put the ship on auto-pilot." Shawn nodded and got out of his Mech Suit, while his wife crawled onto the torso of the Gundam and shimmied open the door. Once it was open, Talia lowered herself into the cockpit.
Once he was free of that damn suit of his own, Shawn crawled up onto the torso, and held his arms out. Talia was unbuckling the boy from his restraints, and for the first time, Shawn saw the blood trickling from the corner of the boy's lip. Shawn's insides turned to ice. The kid had internal injuries. This didn't look good. He didn't know why it was so important to him that this boy lived. . .but it was important. It was damned important.
Talia gently lifted the pilot from the seat and Shawn reached down for the unconscious boy. He got his hands under the youngster's arms and lifted him from the cockpit, with Talia guiding his legs. Once Shawn had the boy out on the torso, Talia pulled herself out of the cockpit, and she said breathlessly, "I'll lower him to the ground from here."
Shawn nodded and slid to the ground, barely aware that his daughter had entered the hold and was now watching them curiously. Talia sat down beside the unconscious pilot, then drew him into her arms, his head resting against her shoulder. She dug in her heels and propelled them both down the Gundam. Shawn caught the injured boy, lowering him to the ground, and Talia landed on her feet easily. Like a damn cat she was, but there was only affection in the observation.
"Here's the med-kit, Mom," Ciara offered as Talia began to pull the protective suit away from their guest. Shawn lowered his head gently to the ground, and Talia held her hand out for the med-kit. Ciara handed it to her, then sank to her knees beside the pilot. She looked up, her eyes shining. There was more than a touch of hero worship in her face.
It occurred to him, not for the first time, that his little girl was growing up. She would be thirteen in six months. . .and dammit, she was starting to notice boys. Worse yet, she developed a monumental crush on the leader of the White Fang, a boy not even out of his teens yet. He was handsome and mysterious. . .definitely someone to appeal to a young girl like Ciara.
But that wasn't the responsibility of the young man. Zechs Merquis, Miliardo Peacecraft, whatever name he used. . .he needed their help. Shawn could only hope that his daughter had enough wisdom to understand that. Then again, Talia helped him to raise Ciara, even before their marriage. He should have more faith in them both.
. . .
Talia had no idea what kind of injuries the Gundam pilot had suffered when his Gundam was so badly damaged, although the blood trickling from his mouth told her that there were some internal injuries. Her heart turned over, seeing for the first time just how young he was. Oh, she knew how many years he lived as soon as she saw his face. She knew quite a lot about Miliardo Peacecraft. But until now, it hadn't struck her how young he was.
//Nineteen or twenty,// she thought as she gently caressed the long blond hair back from his forehead, //the same age as Petyr. My little brother.// The comparison was not a reassuring one, as the pilot's eyes were still closed, and his breathing labored. Talia closed her eyes, remembering her brother. Killed in the same war which resulted in the death of King Peacecraft of the Sank Kingdom.
And the father of the boy now lying on the floor of Talia's vessel. She said softly, "Miliardo Peacecraft. . .Zechs Merquis." As she suspected. Ciara's pale eyes were shining with excitement. She was right as well. Shawn was silent, quite possibly knowing what she was thinking, and Talia said, "Well, I should get this off him, so I at least know if I can save him." She began easing the space suit from his body. She took her time, knowing that it might mean his death if she rushed him out of the suit, if she moved too quickly in any way.
Once that was done, she passed her diagnostic over him, murmuring, "Broken ribs, bruised muscles. Can't tell if he's bleeding internally yet, so we need to be careful when we move him." She was talking more to herself than anyone else. Talia waved the diagnostic around his head, grimacing, and muttered, "Looks like he took a severe blow to his head. Probably knocked the back of his head against the chair when the Gundam took the big blast."
For the first time, she noticed that his lips were turning blue. Frowning, the young woman moved the diagnostic back over his chest, and nodded grimly. She was afraid of that and told Shawn, "One of his broken lungs punctured his lung, I think. His lung hasn't collapsed yet, but we have to hurry. Hand me the oxygen mask. Ciara, honey, I need you to get all of our med equipment set up in the cabin you made up for him." Ciara nodded and jumped to her feet, then ran from the cargo hold. Talia was vaguely aware that the parts they could get from the Gundam would keep them in parts for several years.
Talia turned her attention back to the unconscious pilot. God, but he was so young! With everything which happened in the last year, it was hard to believe that Zechs Merquis. . . Miliardo Peacecraft. . .was only nineteen years old. His sister Relena was only fifteen, the ruler of the Sank kingdom. It all made Talia feel very old, until she remembered what happened when she was sixteen years old.
The fall of the Sank Kingdom, the beginning of her nightmare. That same nightmare created this young man as well. The teenaged Talia ceased to exist on the same day Zechs Merquise replaced Miliardo Peacecraft, small prince of the Sank Kingdom. They took different paths, to erase the nightmares, but somehow, they ended up in the same place. Talia decided she would think about that later. She had to concentrate on the now. But it wasn't that easy.
As she gently placed the oxygen mask over the boy's face, she gently stroked the blond hair back from his eyes. If she were to close her own eyes, she could almost pretend that her little brother was still alive. Almost. But her brother was dead for many years. Nothing could bring him back. She had to remember that, and help this boy. He had a sister as well, and she would need him. Talia was no psychic, couldn't see the future. But she didn't need to.
Once she was satisfied that further moving their unexpected guest wouldn't cause more damage to his already battered body, Talia said softly, "We need to get him to the cabin. I'll stay with him." Shawn started to protest, and Talia smiled at him, saying softly, "You're the better pilot, and I'm the better medic. We can switch roles another time."
Shawn closed his mouth with a snap and replied, "You're absolutely right. I'm sorry. I'll take his feet, you take his shoulders." Talia bobbed her head, smiling, and gently slid her hands under the boy's shoulders. His head fell lightly against her arm as they picked him up. Once more, Talia was reminded of her lost brother. He died in her arms, his small lifeless body cradled against her own thin, all too fragile body. Talia forced the memories back. She would have to face them later, but for now. . .for now, she would see to this child.
. . .
Despite the steps taken by the husband and wife, as well as young Ciara, it was almost a week before they were somewhat positive Zechs Merquis would live. He was weaker than they originally feared. His injuries were only part of the equation. The morning after his rescue, he developed a high fever. That week was spent in a vigil at his side for Talia, while Shawn piloted their craft. She ate and slept, since Ciara would spell her at their patient's side. But she only left the boy's side to eat and sleep, and attend to other bodily functions.
Shawn admitted that the boy seemed more willing to fight while Talia was there, for reasons neither of them understood. Any more than they understood his seeming desire to die. He just lay on the bed, usually unconscious. When he was conscious, it was only for a few moments, and he was delirious. Often, he cried. Crying, begging, for his sister to forgive him. . .but someone had to atone for the weakness, the sins, of humanity. For the incessant wars to end, a sacrifice had to be made. And if it took such a terrible cost, so be it. If people despised his name from the end of time, if it ended war. . .it was necessary.
"But you're just a boy," Talia whispered after one such confession, "just a child. How can you, one mere boy, atone for so many?" She shook her head, gently stroked his hair back from his forehead, and that quieted him. He spoke of others. . .but most of his conversations, most of his words, were for his beloved little sister. As the days passed and Zechs hovered between life and death, Talia faced her brother's death and the end of the Sank Kingdom.
And now, things were coming full circle. Either full circle, or she was being given a second chance. Her brother died in her arms when she was sixteen, in part because Petyr and Talia were instructed to protect the prince in any way they could. Would she have the opportunity to save this young man, when she couldn't save her brother? And perhaps, in doing so, earn the forgiveness of her parents?
These questions were put aside, for she needed to concentrate on healing her patient, who daily struggled with his own battles and demons. A week after they found his Gundam floating in a field of rubble, Zechs Merquis awoke. If Talia believed their lives would get interesting before, the weeks which followed his awakening proved her point.
. .
.
He. . .hurt. Which was strange, because he always believed that death would end all pain. But he hurt now. Oh, he hurt. If there was a part of his body which didn't hurt, he didn't know about it. Then he heard a soft, young girl's voice. Relena? The girl said, "Mom, he's waking up. No, I think he's really waking up!"
At that, Zechs Merquise did force his eyes open. He was wrong. He wasn't dead. And despite the whispering in the back of his mind, the girl at his side wasn't his little sister Relena. The girl beamed at him, saying, "It's an honor to have you aboard, Colonel Merquise!" The child. . .perhaps twelve or thirteen years of age, snapped a salute which would have put half of Oz to shame, as well as the majority of White Fang.
Zechs started to answer, but blinding pain shot through his torso, robbing him of the ability to speak. Colonel Merquise. He hadn't heard that in a long time. Not long enough, however. A soft hand touched his forehead, caressed his hair, and a voice said, "Easy. . .don't try to talk. We weren't sure if you would make it." Zechs closed his eyes against the pain, forcing himself to relax. . .and slowly, the pain eased.
Once he was reasonably certain he could talk in a low voice without blinding pain, Zechs whispered, "Where am I? Who are you? What happened?" Now the pain began taking over again. But with the pain, with consciousness, came questions. He could only vaguely remember the battle with Heero Yuy. And he remembered he meant to die. So. . .why was he alive?
"You're aboard our salvage ship. It doesn't have a name, it doesn't really need one. My name is Talia Malloy, and this is Ciara. We found you about a week ago, after your Gundam battle," that same soft voice answered. Zechs forced himself to open his eyes, and the woman said, "Ciara, turn down the lights, so they don't hurt our guest's eyes."
"Okay, Mom. Should I tell Daddy that he's awake?" the girl asked. Her mother assented, then the girl, Ciara, ran from the room. With the lights not as bright, Zechs focused on the woman sitting beside him. She looked vaguely familiar, though he couldn't place her. His head hurt, his body hurt, his soul hurt, too much for him to concentrate on where he saw her before. The young woman looked to be about twenty-five or thirty, with curly dark hair and hazel eyes.
She smiled at him and said softly, "We weren't sure you'd pull through. You're as strong-willed as the rest of your family." Zechs blinked. . .she knew of his family? His. . . father? Talia. . .that was her name, wasn't it? Talia? He thought that was what she said. She knew his family? But she said gently, "You look like your father. I'm sure he's very proud of you. Your mother, too."
"I've disappointed them both. My father believed in pacifism, and I became a warrior," Zechs answered, then moaned in pain. He should have died, he wanted to die. He told Heero Yuy that they would met again, because he believed they would on the other side. With Treize. But not now, for Heero was needed to protect Relena. Talia's fingers brushed through his hair, and the pain began to ease once more.
"I seriously doubt that. You did what was necessary to survive, what was necessary to protect your little sister. And you succeeded. For that alone, they're proud of you. No more talking. You were hurt very badly. Just rest for now, and we can talk later. I promise to answer what questions I can. Sleep," she said. Zechs again tried to protest, but Talia repeated, stroking his forehead, "Sleep, my little love. Just sleep." Against his will, Zechs found his eyes closing and the darkness came in and claimed him. In his dreams, he was six years old, before his world fell apart, before his family was destroyed. . .while he was still worthy of love.
. . .
"So how is he?" Shawn asked as he joined his wife and daughter in the galley. Ciara raced to the cockpit, gasping that he was awake, Colonel Zechs was awake. Shawn followed her to the med-cabin, where the young man was once more losing consciousness. But he saw the relief in his wife's eyes, and that was all he needed to know for now.
"Well, like I said, he's damn lucky to be alive. Broken ribs, internal bleeding, a punctured lung. From what I could gather from the information we downloaded from his Gundam before we stripped it and blew it up, he was knocked unconscious in the blast. The explosion blasted him through the ship before the block hit the atmosphere, and Heero Yuy blasted it with that cannon of his," Talia answered, wiping her hands on her slacks.
She paused, then continued, "I also downloaded the voice files, talking to the other pilots and to the White Fang. One of the arms was already taken off during his battle with Heero Yuy. According to what I've heard, some of these Gundam Suits have their own consciousness, their own. . .intelligence."
"So, what you're saying, Mom, is that it protected him? How?" Ciara asked. Shawn looked at his wife questioningly, and Ciara went on, "I mean, when the explosion took place, shouldn't the cockpit have been destroyed? Shouldn't it have been totally destroyed, since he was the one who started the process?"
"You'd think so, yes. But that's where the suit comes in. If the suit does have a consciousness of its own, it's entirely likely that the suit tried to protect him. Think about it. The positioning of your body, or another, at the time of impact decides how badly the impacted body will be injured. The suit may have turned sideways after the initial blast, the one that knocked him unconscious. That way, only the remaining limbs were blasted away, leaving the torso intact," Talia answered.
"And what of the life-support system? Would the suit be able to keep his life support system going, even with the hits it must have taken as it was blow through the ship?" Shawn asked. Talia shrugged. . .none of them really knew that much about Gundam Suits. Shawn was silent for a few moments, then asked his wife, "So what now?"
"I don't know," she admitted with a sigh, leaning back against the cabinets, "I really don't know. I have an uneasy feeling that we'll need to keep a watch on him. While I was talking to him, I had the impression that he felt he didn't deserve to live. Nothing specific that he said, particularly. Just the sadness in his voice when he said that he disappointed his parents. Nothing concrete, no reason. . .just a feeling. But, unless we want our efforts to go to waste, we have to convince him that it's worth it. . .that life is worth it."
"How do we do that, Mom? And why would he want to die?" Ciara asked in puzzlement. Shawn smiled faintly at his daughter, understanding her confusion. She grew up in space, she grew up free, surrounded by people who loved her. Even after the death of her mother, ten years earlier, she was surrounded by love. Advantages denied to Miliardo Peacecraft. . .Zechs Merquise. He and Talia talked a great deal during the last week. About the tragedy which brought her to him and Elene.
"Because, honey, in order to survive, he had to do some terrible things. And he can't forgive himself for that. Remember how he would cry in his sleep, about wanting his sister to forgive him? That's what I mean. But we have to convince him to forgive himself. We have to convince him that life is worth it. . .that he's worth it," Talia answered.
"Which brings us back to the original question. How?" Shawn asked. Talia sighed again. Shawn got the picture. She was as clueless as they were. But Shawn found he was just as determined to keep that young man alive as his wife. His motivations were different than hers, but their ends were the same.
"Ciara, before you were born, I was a lot like that young man. I didn't believe I deserved to live. But your father and mother taught me that the only way a person can atone for what they've done, or failed to do, is by living. And they loved me. It sounds terribly corny. . .but it's true. We convince him to keep living, by loving him," Talia answered.
Shawn considered his wife's words. Love. Could something so simple be so necessary to save the life of a young man? Why not? As Talia said, it was love which saved her when he and Elene found her all those years ago. True, Zechs Merquise was older, and had even more on his soul than that lost little girl had. But it was a place to start.
