Repercussions

This will contain side-stories, omake, what-ifs, et cetera, relating to Rewind, because there are some things I'd like to show you that Shikamaru doesn't see. So yeah. It will probably be updated sporadically, whenever the ideas come to me, especially during the school year.

It may contain spoilers for Rewind if you haven't read it yet, or even for chapters I haven't written. It probably won't make all that much sense if you haven't read it, either.

Failure

Character(s): Older!Naruto, Older!Shikamaru
Related Chapters: Prologue
Genre: Angst
Summary: Shikamaru's soul has departed, and it looks like he's dead.

The seal is very intricate, dark lines of ink stretching across the floor neatly. It has to be perfect. A single line out of place could mean failure, and they cannot afford to fail.

There are several smaller seals around the outside perimeter of the seal. These smaller seals hold chakra, and will all be released in the same moment. If the seal is imperfect, they will both probably die in a massive explosion.

Nobody will miss them.

They had spent months, perhaps years, on designing the seal. They had spent several days inking it into the floor of a building, when they should not have stayed in one place for too long a period of time. It's okay though, sort of. They do not think they will be interrupted, for everyone else within several kilometres is dead.

They have returned to Konoha, and they had rebuilt this structure on their own.

Shikamaru stands in the centre of the seal, back straight and eyes alert. Naruto summons four shadow clones, each one a part of his consciousness, and he stands on one corner of a large pentagon. There is a kanji underneath him, the symbol for wind'. His clones stationed themselves at the predetermined symbols, not needing a verbal command.

He makes one hand seal, then another, then more, in rapid succession. He flips through the hand seals they'd determined would be needed with practiced ease; having rehearsed them so often that they were now ingrained in his memory, he could practically do them in his sleep. But they could have been wrong. Naruto hasn't been able to practice moulding the chakra, because actually performing the jutsu before they were fully prepared would have been too dangerous. What if the seals backfired horribly? What if he moulded the chakra wrong, or didn't use enough or used too much? He might be doing it wrong, and he would never know.

He is sweating. He hopes the sweat doesn't drip off onto the seal, because that could be disastrous. It could smudge part of the seal, or completely ruin it. And foreign materials could also throw all of this off; even if they are wearing clothing he can't help but worry. Maybe the clothes will ruin the jutsu, too. He hopes not.

He knows that he will be left alone, after this, but he doesn't deserve another chance. But Shikamaru does. And so Naruto will do his part to undo the destruction that led to this pitiful point in their lives. He thinks that maybe, if all goes well, he will have repented for all of his sins. He knows that Shikamaru will succeed, but if Naruto was to fail at this crucial moment, this will have been for nothing – all of this. Shikamaru's abilities and great intellect would not matter, not if he never got a chance to use them. Everything hinges on Naruto's skill; he is the one who had trained under a great seal master; he is the one that is performing the jutsu. He is the one doubting himself, the one with the terrible feeling that his skills will only take them so far; he thinks this, even though he knows that Shikamaru, being so confident in Naruto's abilities, has no such thoughts. The confidence is unfounded, and unfair, because Naruto doesn't deserve it and doesn't want Shikamaru to trust Naruto to do this when he might actually not be able to do what's needed.

It certainly wouldn't be the first time.

He releases the chakra within the seals in a bright blue flash. They flow into the right parts of the seal easily, having been designed to do so. He uses his own chakra to direct the chakra in the more complex patterns, and his own massive stores are used to sustain the jutsu until they have finished.

Naruto almost wishes that he could die from this, that the excessive cost of chakra would end his pathetic excuse of a life, but then the jutsu would not succeed. And it has to succeed, no matter what the cost to him.

Even if he can never see his friend again.

But something is wrong. Shikamaru sways on his feet, eyes shut tightly. Shikamaru screams, a sound that brings back a million memories and none. Naruto almost launches himself to his friend's side; his heart pounds with fear for his friend (and maybe himself, says a nasty thought at the back of his head, maybe his just doesn't want to be alone). He yells at Shikamaru, to answer him – say something, anything! Is he alright, can he move? He tries to stop himself from leaving his place; a battle he is quickly losing. Sensing his intentions, his shadow clones, his own clones, shout at him to stay put and continue the jutsu. They have gone too far to end this here now. If they quit now, they have no chance of succeeding, and they don't know what will happen. If they continue, maybe Shikamaru will get the second chance he deserves.

And Uzumaki Naruto is not a quitter.

His clones know him too well, and it is with apprehension and a great amount of worry and tension that Naruto does as they suggest. He watches Shikamaru convulse and fall, but he just swallows and, gritting his teeth, keeps going with all of the determination he can muster. Shikamaru's body is limp and his body hits the ground. He convulses again, blood spilling out of the side of his mouth. And now, finally, the jutsu is complete. Shikamaru is surrounded by concentrated chakra, a shimmering aura of light that would blind Naruto if his tenant wasn't healing his eyes even now. Naruto rushes to his friend's side as he watches the fade, and grabs onto Shikamaru's shoulder. His red, slitted eyes stare into his friend's. He looks for a sign of life, or anything at all, yelling at Shikamaru to answer him, but the light in the Nara's eyes is fading.

So much to lose…

Naruto panics, feeling for a pulse in Shikamaru's neck. He feels nothing, only warm flesh that will soon cool. But maybe, in his panic, he just felt the wrong place – or so he hopes – and kneels down beside the body with his ear above Shikamaru's mouth. His hands shift Shikamaru's head so that he won't choke on his own tongue, as he has been taught by a civilian. His own harsh breathing and pounding heart distract him from being able to hear Shikamaru breathe, and there is no hot breath on his ear.

But all is not lost, because even though he could never perform a medical jutsu if his friend's life depended on it (as has been proven time and time again), there are things even a civilian can do. They had to learn after they had lost their last medic (Naruto winces at how apathetic he sounds), and Naruto has learned well.

so much already lost…

He presses his mouth on Shikamaru's and breathes out, once, twice, then moves on to compressions. His hands press down on Shikamaru's chest repeatedly, in a desperate attempt to get the heart pumping. He hears ribs crack, and the poof of his clones disappearing, but continues.

He doesn't think about the success rate.

He keeps going for what must be hours, and the sun is rising by the time he finally stops, his arms burning. They'd started yesterday morning, and he had kept going through the night – a feat that must be unsurpassed. His stamina is legendary, after all.

Shikamaru is still not breathing.

Naruto stands up slowly, feeling dizzy. He has just – for the moment seems to have been mere seconds ago – killed his only remaining friend. His cheeks are dry.

now tell me…

There is another presence in his mind, a sinister voice, and he is not fighting it.

He is no better than Sasuke, after all.

what is there left to gain?


Betaed by NaiteShyde

Posted 12 September 2007