by neorenamon
Papyrus, Sans, Asgore, Toriel, Flowey, Frisk (female), Undyne, Alphys and others are the property of Undertale and Toby Fox. Please support the official release. The Girl with No Name/Baagh is my own creation. Rated M for later sexual content, and contains shipping: Asgore-Toriel, Frisk-OC, Papyrus-Metatton, Udyne-Alphys and others
...
Asgore and Toriel set out the picnic setting as Frisk played with Flowey on the nearby swingset, and Sans... he was just doing 'sentry duty' from a nearby park bench. Tori was moving a little more slowly than usual since she was more than six months pregnant with Asgore's latest child. The bulge in her belly was clearly visible under her royal robes.
"I wonder what Undyne and Alphys are doing today?" asked Frisk as she pushed Flowey's swing.
"Knowing them," he smirked, "It's probably something... fishy."
"Flowey!" she replied, "That was almost... humerus."
"Great, the Smiling Trash Bag is rubbing off on you."
"He's been in my funny bone since the first day we met," she chuckled.
"I'm not sure who's worse, Smiling Trash Bag or his brother, Dense Optimist."
"That's not a nice thing to say about him," she replied.
"Oh really?" he smirked, "Isn't a fool someone who does the same thing over and over, and somehow expects a different result?"
"That's one defin..."
"Well we've been coming to this park every week for 3 months and still he does the same thing every time we come here. He goes to the human side of the park, announces 'HUMANS! I AM THE GREAT PAPYRUS! I AM YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND!' By the time he's done saying it, the humans are already screaming and running away. Yet every time, he comes back and claims that the next week will be somehow different than this one."
Sans stirred at Flowey's outburst.
"Sorry Sans," said Frisk.
"That's okay, kiddo," he replied, "Has Paps come back yet?"
"No," replied the flower, "He's taking his sweet time this time. I have yet to hear any running or screaming from the other side of the park."
"Maybe he's been around there long enough that at least one human will talk to him."
"Or maybe some human is sick of his intrusions and dealt with him."
Sans jumped to his feet and ran off down the path the Paps used. "Oh no," he said, "No no no no!"
"Well aren't you little mister sunshine," muttered Frisk.
"After some of the things you did to his brother, I don't think he's being unreasonable," he replied.
Frisk fell silent.
...
Sans ran down the path towards the human side of the park. He was hoping that that part of his life was finally buried in the Underground. But to his relief, he heard Paps voice off the trail.
"Human?" he asked haltingly, "Please..."
Turning off the path, he came across the area where the park dumpsters were kept. Even though he technically had no nose, the place reeked with garbage. Due to budget cuts, the trash was only collected once a week from the main bins, and even then after the trash was collected from smaller cans around the park by the handful of employees.
Then he saw Paps carrying a human back towards the path. If he wasn't so worried, he might have paid more attention to her. He was just so grateful that it was Paps and not a pile of white dust being carried off with the breeze.
"Oh Sans," he sniffed, "I think... I broke this human!"
He could hear her sniffle, sob and weep in his arms.
Sans slowed as he approached, his normal demeanor coming back to the front as he said, "Hey kiddo, what's with the waterworks?"
"I have..." she sniffed, "I have..."
He stopped when he reached Paps.
"I HAVE A NEW BEST FRIEND!" she cried as tears rolled down her cheeks.
"Uh... okay..." replied Sans, as that was clearly not the result he was expecting.
"So... how do I fix this?" asked Papyrus.
"Good new, Paps," smirked Sans, "There's no need to fix something if they're not broken."
"Not broken?" he asked.
"It's called weeping," he replied, "Something humans do when very upset... or very happy."
"THAT'S WONDERFUL NEWS!" cried Paps.
"Still, I gotta wonder what the human was doing around the trash," he mused.
"They said they were looking for discarded foodstuffs," replied the taller skeleton as the two of them returned to the path.
"Oh kiddo, you can do better than junk food!"
Paps grimaced at San's joke, but the human giggled unexpectedly. "Well human," he said after a moment, "I'm sure we can spare some food for you back at our site."
"If you don't mind hanging out with monsters," added Sans.
She wiped her eyes with her tattered sleeve, and then replied, "Monsters... are no worse than... some humans."
Off in the distance, they could see the picnic site, and just hear Torial say, "Oh look honey! I think we're having company today!"
"Great," muttered Flowey, "I guess we're up to human-napping now."
"The human doesn't appear to be trying to escape," she replied.
Asgore and Frisk waved warmly as the trio came closer.
"I hope we have something the child will want to eat," mused Toriel nervously.
Paps set the human down by Frisk so that Flowey was on the other side of them.
"GEEZ!" growled the flower as he sniffed the air, "Where did you find this one?! Swimming in garbage?!"
"Actually..." said Paps.
"Paps can't help it if the human is into junk food!"
Everyone snickered except Papyrus and Flowey. Flowey expected that kind of bad joke from Smiling Trash Bag, and Paps didn't like to hear the same pun more than once.
"We have more than enough to eat," said Tori, "I'll give you whatever you want. We have... well I hope you don't mind store bought food..."
The girl with no name shook her head 'no'.
"If the human was looking for food in a dumpster," replied Sans, "then I don't think they're that fussy."
"We have fried chicken, spiral cut ham, and spare ribs as well as big beef hotdogs on the grill over there," he said as he indicated the smoking public grill, "mustard potato salad, macaroni salad, fruity jello salad, a variety of diet and regular sodas in the cooler..." He indicated the large cooler by the picnic blanket. "and some cheesecake variety samplers."
"Do those sound good, my child?" asked Tori.
She nodded as she started sniffling again.
"Is something wrong?" asked Frisk.
"I'm sorry," she sniffed as she wiped her eyes, "I'm not used to be called someone's child."
"Are you an orphan?"
She nodded.
"Living on the streets?!"
She hesitated before shaking her head 'no'.
Asgore piled her plate high before he turned it over to her. They all blinked as she tore into it with about as much care as a rabid wolverine.
"And they say I have no manners," muttered the flower.
"The poor kid is starving," replied Sans, "They're practically..."
"Skin and bones?!" snapped Paps.
"I was going to say malnourished, but..."
Paps just growled. They all knew Sans was going to say that, but just changed it once Paps said it out loud first.
"You must forgive Sans," said Frisk, "He isn't always boned up on the latest jokes."
"Ugh..." groaned Paps, "Stop encouraging him!"
She stopped and stared at her empty plate, as even the chicken bones were picked clean.
"Seconds, my child?" asked Tori.
She nodded as goat-momma took her plate back to reload it with everything.
"Thank goodness we didn't bring any thin after dinner mints," muttered Flowey as the other human tore into the second load of food. Everyone else was still on their first plate, and Sans just drank his hand bottled ketchup.
She glanced over at Sans and then down at her hot dog.
"Sorry kiddo," he smirked, "but you ain't old enough for this ketchup."
She blinked as Frisk handed her another bottle. "That's a homemade ketchup," she said softly, "It's made with a quart of brandy per gallon."
Her head snapped back to Frisk as she blinked and took the commercial ketchup bottle from her. Then she went back to stuffing her face with good food. By the time she was done with thirds, everyone else was done eating as well.
"I'll help you pack," offered Asgore to Toriel.
"Thanks dear," she replied.
"Great," muttered Flowey, "The hobo over here can take her flies and go home."
"I... should go..." she said as she stood, but Frisk took her hand and stopped her.
"Your guardians wouldn't like it if we sent you home like this," she said.
"Yes, my child," agreed Toriel, "We'll take you by the house first for a bath and some clean change of clothing."
"I'm... I'm not worth it..." she replied slowly.
Asgore chuckled before he answered, "I think we can decide that, human."
"I'm... I'm SORRY!" she cried as she bowed to them.
"Don't worry 'bout it kiddo," offered Sans, "The Dreemurrs,.. They're both real softies once you get to know them."
"Stink up the van..." muttered Flowey.
"Says the one who stays in a pot with dirt containing crappy fertilizer," replied Sans.
"At least that smell was removed back at the factory!" hissed the flower.
Frisk took the strange girl's hand as they headed off to where they were parked. The girl smiled as she felt the strong, warm grip of Frisk.
