Disclaimer: I do not own Dan and Blair. They are from Gossip Girl and whoever owns that. Also, I am definitely not making any money from this, but I am very much enjoying the idea of Dan and Blair. 3
"When are you going to learn, Cabbage Patch?" Blair rolled her eyes. "No good deed goes unpunished in the Upper East Side."
"Well, I figured the first hundred times were just flukes and eventually I'll get to the one time where things don't blow up in my face." Dan waved his cup of coffee around as he tried to defend himself.
Blair scoffed. "You're an idiot."
"Oh yeah, like you're so much better, Waldorf," Dan stopped walking, forcing Blair to stop and turn to him in exasperation.
"Excuse me?"
"How many times your evil plans actually follows your plans?" he said defensively. "I'm willing to bet your odds are just as good as mine."
She narrowed her eyes and walked up to him. For someone so short, she was most threatening with her upward gaze. Oh, wait, Dan realized, it's Blair. "Do not compare my elaborate schemes to your petty children's storybook plots! And my ratio and chances of success is ten times – if not a hundred times – better than yours! You're terrible at lying, you don't know people, and have no resources whatsoever! And you wonder why your plans don't work!" she turned on her heels after shaking her head in anger. How dare he compare her to him?
They walk in silence to the theater for a while, coffees in hand forgotten as both simmered in slight anger.
"Well…hey, at least we're both here?" Dan kidded.
Blair stopped and gave him a most scathing look.
He felt like he was about to die or melt where he stood.
She breathed deeply and pursed her lips. "Let's just go in, watch the movie in silence," she emphasized, "and afterwards you go to whatever hole in Brooklyn you came from and I'll go back to my lovely penthouse." She looked at him with a saccharine smile and walked past the ticket stub guy who smiled amusedly at Dan.
"Rough night?" he chuckled.
Dan smiled and shrugged. "Going to be lots of fun."
And usually a movie night with Blair is lots of fun. Just not tonight.
He didn't think he was an idiot and he didn't think he was asking or planning for much at all. He just wanted his little sister to come home for her birthday. You know, typical right?
It's her birthday. She doesn't have many friends in the suburbs. He knew the reason why she would constantly text Erik and frequently call him. It only made sense that she misses them, and spending one day, her birthday, with her family shouldn't be too big of a deal right?
Wrong.
Apparently as soon as Jenny Humphrey got off the train, somehow Gossip Girl blabbed to the world that the girl who stole Chuck from Queen B is traipsing back to the Upper East Side. With Nate.
Dan confirmed with Nate that he chanced upon her return and they grabbed coffee. Hell, Blair, Serena, and Chuck all confirmed this.
But no, Gossip Girl and her manipulative, misleading text made Blair lose face.
Dan didn't dare to call her a friend. Not to her face anyway.
But, he knew they were something akin to that.
Quickly texting her, he explained his, according to Blair, "misguided" intentions, and she let it slide. She reminded him of his sister's role in almost causing Serena's downfall and several other things. He didn't appreciate her mentioning them, but he was grateful that she wasn't her usual Blair self with her choice in wording towards his sister.
So they made peace somewhat.
Jenny gets to spend the day once more in the Upper East Side, but only at Lily's place and perhaps a nice dinner at a restaurant if they don't break the pact.
No problem there, Dan didn't want trouble anyway.
But no, somehow Jenny gets into a fight with Rufus.
While Dan was placating his dad, Nate whisked away Jenny. (Okay, fine. So Jenny called him…and Erik left with them. But still.)
Gossip Girl (if only she would die somewhere in the desert) sends a picture of them making out at a club.
Dan shows up, punches Nate and they get into a little fight.
Blair had to pull Dan back while Jenny stood in front of Nate. (Surprisingly, Blair was glaring at Nate rather than Jenny).
Dan ended the night with a broken wrist, lost one of his few guy friends, sends his little sister home in a huff, and a condescending Blair.
He was surprised very surprised to learn that Chuck had nothing to do with his misfortunes that night.
"How are you handling your classes?" Blair suddenly whispered during the movie. "You can't take notes or type, right?"
Dan shrugged but he's been stressing about that actually. He can't do anything with his right wrist for three weeks. "Nothing I can do about that. It's not like I can type with my left hand quickly much less write. Not that big of a deal though, I just sit there and let my genius self soak up all the information the professor lectures."
Blair looked at him skeptically.
"I'm also borrowing people's notes."
She nodded. She seemed pleased. "Seeing as how you're handicapped now." She paused, "Well even more so."
He chuckled.
"I can lend you my notes as well. I am sure that my notes will be far superior to those of your…friends."
He frowned. "How can you be nice and mean at the same time?"
She cast him another exasperated look. "Honestly, you may be from Brooklyn but how long has it been since you've been in the Upper East Side?" she shook her head.
After another break of silence, he asked, "What happened to no good deed goes unpunished?"
"Do you not want my notes?" she rolled her eyes. "Unlike you, I know how to do a good deed without it coming back and bite me."
He looked at her amusedly. "You're kidding, right?"
She shot him another look. "I don't know why I'm here with you. You learn nothing."
He didn't know why. Maybe it was because she was being nice. Maybe it's because she's the only person who's company he truly enjoys nowadays (and he gets the feeling she feels the same about him). Or maybe it's the (nonexistent) pain in his wrist.
But Dan decided that in that moment, he likes Blair. A lot.
Blair's mouth gaped when she felt his lips on hers. When she didn't respond to the kiss, he pulled back with a slight smile.
"No good deed goes unpunished, right?" he almost smirked at her disorient face but slight smile and flushed cheeks. "Thanks for the notes ahead of time, Blair."
When she heard her name, something in her snapped and she pulled his head back to her. His lips crashed onto hers and they both muffled an, "Ow."
Looking at each other with silly grins, Dan leaned forward again and kissed her. The kiss started off gentle but it wasn't long before it became a full make out session when he bit her bottom lip gently and slipped his tongue inside her mouth as Blair moaned into his mouth.
The movie was soon forgotten and the evening was much more enjoyable than the others.
When they walked out, her arms were wrapped around his as they walked back to his apartment to enjoy another movie. Or not.
