Disclaimer

I don't own any of these characters. blah, blah, blah...

No profit is being made. blah, blah, blah...

"My name is John Crichton... An astronaut... Three years ago I got shot through a wormhole... I'm in a distant part of the Universe... Aboard this living ship of escaped prisoners... My friends... I've made enemies... Powerful, dangerous... Now all I want is to find a way home... To warn Earth... Look upward and share the wonders I've seen"

F A R S C A P E

A PLAGUE UPON THE GALAXY

Part 1

Wormholes, Pushy DRDs, and Riding the short bus...

"Aeryn... is... with child."

Inside the module, John, didn't react to these words at first, still numb from Aeryn's abandonment. An image of Aeryn flashed through his mind as he began to wake from his self induced daze.

"Aeryn, why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you trust me?" Asked Crichton quietly, just before losing control of his grief and anger. "Old Woman!" Crichton screamed over the comms as he quickly began to power up the Farscape's systems in quick succession.

"Pilot. Patch me through to Aeryn."

"She is beyond our range, Commander."

"Get a fix on her position; we're goin' after her."

This was too much for Jool to take. She wasn't going to let Crichton get her involved in another adventure gone wrong. "Hold on a microt!"

John not in the mood to listen to another Jool whine session cut her off before she could get started. "Damn it! Just do it!"

Jool sitting on the piloting console, in front of Pilot, wasn't ready to give in one bit. No, not this time. If he wanted to chase Aeryn down & torture himself some more with his non-relationship with her, he would have to wait until Pilot took her to Arnessk. Arnessk, the perfect place for her to get off this crazy ship and it's even crazier human.

"First we'll go to my..." She continued.

Her demand quickly changed to a surprised squeal, as the old woman grabbed a handful of her hair and yanked her head backward. This surprised Jool enough to silence her.

"Obey his command, Pilot." Encouraged the old woman in a perfectly calm voice.

"Pilot, please. For the love of God, please." Begged Crichton, still sitting in the Farscape's cockpit. He felt a wave of helplessness enveloping him.

Pilot watched the old woman hold Jool immobilized. But Crichton's ardent plea drew his attention back to his console. And Aeryn's last known coarse.

"Uh... I shall approximate Officer Sun's vector and initiate chase upon your retrieval." Responded Pilot as he began manipulating controls, simultaneously opening the landing bay doors as well as plotting a coarse to pursue Aeryn.

Crichton maneuvered his module around to face Moya. Only now realizing how far away he had allowed himself to drift. As he prepared to fire up his engines he sensed something that he would later describe only as a tickle in his mind. He looked out at Moya as a blinding flash of blue light shattered the relative calm of the space around them. It quickly expanded into a large churning mass of blue energy. The same mass of energy that irrecoverably changed his life three years ago. A Wormhole. A Wormhole that was way too close to Moya.

John blinked his eyes, trying to get them to adjust to the unexpected bright light. Then before he could react, Moya was caught in its gravity well. John could do nothing but watch as the Leviathan was pulled into the wormhole, tail first. A static filled Comm channel from Moya transmitted his friends' distress.

"Commander!...stay clear!...We're being... Commander!..."

The channel was severed, as the wormhole pulled Moya past its event horizon & out of sight. Another bright flash of blue light heralded the wormhole's disappearance. As it collapsed in on itself and winked out of existence. Leaving the Farscape drifting alone in the vastness of space.

John looked out at the space before him. His mind not yet willing to except what his eyes were telling him. Moya was gone. Swallowed by a frelling wormhole. He was alone and almost out of fuel. His gaze drifted to the starboard view port, looking for some place he could possibly go with so little fuel. His eyes focused on the only other thing near him. The Leviathan burial grounds.

"You have got to be kidding me..."

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Sacred Burial Grounds

Leviathan: Elak

Sometime later...

63... 63 days ago, Moya got swallowed by a wormhole. 61 days ago, I was officially crowned the luckiest sorry son-of-a-bitch. Not just on Earth, but multiple other planets as well. Because, that's when Elak showed up. I musta' gotten better at the "Please, don't shoot cause I'm even more pathetic than I look" signal, because Elak's Pilot let me onboard with a minimal of begging. Oh, then let's not forget that 2 days ago, I traded my L.S.S.O.B. crown in for my "Frell with me and I just might drop a Wormhole on your ass" tiara. How? I figured out wormholes. And I'm not talking wormholes for dummies, just add solar flare. No, I'm talkin' popin' up out of nowhere and swallowing ships wormhole, wormhole. Well, I think I have anyway...

John "target on my ass" Crichton

Journal day 63

"John, do you think this is a good idea?" Asked the elderly pilot.

"Probably not Pilot. But, I've never let small details like those stop me. So, why start now? Besides, if I'm not exactly right, I'm really close. So, there you go..." Responded Crichton, as he crossed the landing bay, coming to a stop next to his module. He began to climb in when a pair of eyestalks rose out of the module's cockpit.

"1812, what are you doing in there? I already told you that you would have to wait here. Come here, Bubba. Let's get you out of there." Said Crichton while reaching to pick up the little DRD. He quickly snatched his hand back as the quirky DRD zapped his hand.

"Hey, watch it!" Exclaimed Crichton, while giving his DRD antagonist a dirty look. "Pilot, 1812 is givin' me a tude'. You think you can give me a hand here?"

"I'm sorry John, but that particular DRD isn't responding to my commands. In fact, it is being quite insistent about going with you." Responded Pilot; a bit confused about this DRDs recent bout of independence.

"Great, just what I needed, a pushy DRD." Grumbled John as he pulled himself up on top of the module and slipped into the pilot seat.

"I can shut it down if you wish..." Continued Pilot.

1812 didn't seem to like this option. Displayed by its squeal and vigorous shaking eyestalks. John shook his head in slight amusement as 1812 continued to have a fit. "No Pilot, never mind. It's my own fault for spoiling the little shit..." Came John's sarcastic reply, while powering up the module. This instantly calmed 1812, who then moved to the small area directly behind John's seat.

John stopped to look over his shoulder and stated "Ya know you're starting to become a high maintenance pet." 1812 sat motionless, starring up at John. "Smartass..." Continued John, while turning back around to resume his start-up check list.

"Really John, must you? It's a DRD not a dog." Spoke up Harvey for the first time in a long time.

"Bite me, Harv. I gotta entertain myself somehow. And what the hell are you doing talkin to me! I thought we had an agreement. You keep yer lip buttoned and I won't have ta' snap and take us both out..."

"Hardly a fair agreement, John."

"Seems fair to me."

"Not to me..."

"Ya? Well, my opinion is the only one that counts. So, shut the hell up an' leave me alone!"

"Very well John, but I worry about your sanity."

"Who doesn't?" Grumbled John.

"Alright Pilot; let's see if I'm through with 'Wormholes for Dummies' or if I'm still riding the short bus." Joked John.

As relaxed as he tried to sound to pilot, John wasn't fooling himself. He knew this would be tricky. The power requirements alone for his patched together Displacement Drive were enormous. But, the old gal didn't need to know how dangerous this was going to be. She was dieing along with Elak; she didn't need to worry about him.

"John, I'm still not sure I understand how you've reached your current conclusions so quickly. When you said yourself that wormhole equations are complicated to understand." Spoke pilot with a weak voice.

"Well pilot, I'll tell you. Have you ever had a question bouncing around your head, then suddenly, boom the answer is sitting right in front of you. Just one of those one in a million things. Complete random chance Pilot." Responded John.

"Yes John, thank you. I understand now."

"Not I problem pilot."

"The landing bay door is now open."

"Right, I'm lifting off now..." Returned John as the Farscape module lifted off the deck and shot out of the bay door. John made sure to put some extra distance between himself & Elak. John started to speak out loud to himself as he began his little experiment.

"Alright, let's do this. Displacement drive online. Power generator ports open. Switching over main power. Displacement drive at 63 percent...70...76...89...95... Drive at 100 percent. Ok, it's time. Wish me luck pilot."

"Of course John. Good luck. And please be careful." Spoke pilot with a tired voice.

"You got it pilot. Alright, and away we go..." Finished John before punching in the activation code for the Displacement drive. For a few seconds nothing happened. Then space directly in front of him began to ripple. This was followed by a blinding blue light. Forcing John to close his eyes tightly to protect his vision. When John opened his eyes seconds later, a wormhole hung in space.

"Beautiful..." John said in awe.

"John! John! Commander!" John heard pilot urgently calling him. "John, Elak's sensors show that the wormhole does not appear to be stable. Power readings are fluctuating. You must move away. Commander. John. Can you hear me?"

John heard all this at the same moment the wormhole started to violently wobble. Seconds later, it began expanding once again. Expanding directly toward John. "Ah, Crap..." He muttered with apprehension as he watched the wormhole drawing closer. John finally snapped out of his shock and pulled back on the module's controls as hard as he could. Unfortunately, it was already too late. The wormhole slammed into the module like a freight train, knocking out all power. And causing John to ram his head against the side of the cockpit. Now, dazed & bloody, John found himself shooting down the wormhole at a very suicidal speed. John tried to restore power, with little affect.

"Ah, come on! This is just embarrassing..." Stated John in frustration. Then out of the corner of his eye, a quick flash caught his attention. He turned his head up to look out in front of him. What he was seeing just couldn't be real. He shook his head in an attempt to clear his vision. While it was a far cry from medical treatment, it cleared his vision enough to see a massive unknown ship bearing down on him. John's eyes grew large as the space between the two ships disappeared quickly.

"Son of a bitch! Come on you piece of crap!" Yelled John, while slamming his hand down on the front control panel.

Surprisingly, this universally known technique worked. The module's systems burst back to life. John hit the throttle and steered the Farscape away from the incoming ship.

John quickly realized that he didn't have enough time or room to skirt around the goliath.

So, he did the only thing that would give him a chance. He adjusted his trajectory to take him between the ships forward swept, wing like, struts. As the module sped through its target zone, it clipped its wing tip, causing it to ricochet off the larger ship. Once again powerless and out of control, the module belly flopped against the wormhole's wall with enough force to knock John unconscious and break back through to normal space.

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When John regained consciousness the first thing he noticed was the strong feeling that he was being watched. He shifted his head to the side to find 1812 perched on the top of his seat, looking down at him." Yeah...Yeah... I know. Short bus it is..." 1812 gave a short confirming chirp, before moving its eyestalks to point out the forward view port. John followed its gaze and saw what had the little guy's attention. It was clear that they were back in open space. No, not open space. They were in a star system of some kind. And not too far in front of them was a planet. A gas giant to be exact. If he had to guess, John thought it looked comparable to Saturn back home. Complete with a set of rings. What was strange though was that the planet looked like it was getting bigger. It was then that he realized that the module was still moving. And at a pretty good clip too.

John could almost hear his High School Science teacher's voice. "In space... objects in motion, remain in motion..."

"Yeah right, until they plow into something like, Oh say... A freaking planet! Thanks Mr. Johnson, I don't know what I would do with out you!" Yelled out John, as he tried to figure out how to save his ass, again... How many times had it been today?

"Why do I have the feeling this going to be a long day?" He asked looking over at 1812, who had moved to attach itself to the inner wall near the starboard view port. The excitable DRD responded with a series of incomprehensible chirps & squeaks. John wasn't sure, but it sounded like the little guy was stressed out.

'Great, my DRD needs therapy...' Thought John, looking out at the gas giant again. That was when he noticed an object hanging above the planet. In fact, it was practically sitting on top of the planets' ring belt. What was it? It looked like a ship... It then came to him. The wormhole. That ship was the same one that he nearly collided with inside the wormhole.

John switched on the backup battery and turned on his radio. "Hey, yo... I'm talkin' to the big ass ship out there. This is... Clarence... John Clarence. Maybe you remember me, we kinda clipped each other in the wormhole. Say, look my little ship isn't doing too good. And I'm nearly outta fuel. So, if you could kindly let me onboard long enough to make repairs..." He waited for a response, but received nothing. "Can anyone over there hear me?" Still nothing.

"Well, that sucks..." He mumbled to himself, only to have 1812 draw his attention with more chirps and waving eyestalks. "1812, we really need to get you some Valium."

John watched the mysterious ship growing closer, while he tried to think about what to do next. After a few minutes, he was able to start to see details. One of these details caught his attention. John could now see that the main landing bay on its port side was hanging open. This was the chance he was looking for. John looked down at the control panel. The fuel gauge read empty. He probably only had maybe a minute of burn time. But if he did it just right, it should be enough. And he had his space suit in the compartment behind him. It was time that he was running short on. John quickly powered up all systems and ran a check on the engines. The module's computer told him that flight control commands weren't reaching the engines.

"Crap..." Muttered John as he slipped down under the module's front panels. "Yo, 1812. I could use a hand down here."

1812 moved down next to John. It looked up where John was sorting through a bundle of wires. John turned to face 1812. "Half of these are cut. You think you patch em' up for me little Bubba?" He got an exited reply. "I'll take that as a yes. Good. Get to work and make it snappy."

John moved out from under the panel to grab his space suit from the small compartment behind his seat. He quickly slipped it on. While locking his helmet in place and belting himself in, John glanced out in front of him. He saw exactly what he didn't want to see. The module was so close that the other ship nearly filled the entire front view port. If he waited much longer, the module would pass the other ship and hit the planets atmosphere. At such a steep angle, the module would be destroyed.

"1812, you done down there? We're out of time. I need my engines!" Asked John starting to grow tense. Immediately, 1812 emerged and gave John a chirp. "Good, hang on to something..."

John started up the module's engines while simultaneously opening the throttle to full power. The module shot forward, forcing John to make a sharp turn to line up with the open landing bay, before he past the ship altogether. Halfway there, he reversed the module's engines to slow his final approach. Only seconds before passing the bays outer doors, the module ran out of fuel. Without engine power, John no longer had any control. He crossed his arms over his chest and braced himself with gritted teeth. The Farscape hit the deck and skidded to a relatively gentle stop.

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John opened his eyes and looked around. The inside of the pod seemed to be ok. The cabin was still pressurized. Other than the cut on his head from its earlier run-in with a side panel, he felt only minor aches and pains from the day's events. John looked down, next to his feet was 1812 lying on his side, trying to right himself. John gave him a slight push with his foot, righting him. 1812 turned around to look up at John, giving him a chirp.

"You're welcome." Said John before continuing. "Well, as crash landings go, I guess that could've gone a lot worse." John looked out at the bay in front of him. "Ok, everything looks quiet... or dead... Ok, that's a bit creepy... alright, I guess we should see what we got ourselves into." Finished John, as he reached out and flipped the canopy switch. He unbelted and stood up as 1812 moved up the module's wall enough to peer over the cockpit lip.

John's attention was drawn to the wall ahead of him. On it was a closed doorway with what looked like a small panel next to it. "Looks like that door over there on that far wall leads into the ship. That panel might control both the outer & inner doors. If we can do that, we might be able to get this place repressurized. Alright 1812 go for it..."

1812 gave a sharp chirp in response and jerked his eyestalks up in John's direction. John looked back. "Well?" Asked John. 1812 continued to stare up at John, once again doing his imitation of a statue. "Right... Stupid Human's first." Concluded John. 1812 immediately turned his eyestalks back to the door, apparently satisfied with the conclusion of their conversation.

As Crichton climbed out of the module's cockpit and stopped to take a look around, his mouth dropped open as he finally got a good look at the size of the hanger bay he landed in.

"Christ-on-a-Crutch, Moya might actually fit in here." He mumbled to himself.

As he moved deeper inside with 1812 following at a short distance, John came to the inner bay door. A flat faced control panel off to the side of the door was back lit & flickering on and off. After a few moments of study, Crichton was able to muddle his way through enough to get the outer bay doors to close and the bay repressurized.

"I thought so..." John smiled at his accomplishment. As he turned to watch the bay doors finish closing, he froze in apprehension. Off to one side, where he didn't notice it until now sat a Peacekeeper Stealth Marauder. John looked down at 1812, now sitting at his feet.

"See, I told you this would be a long day..."