Angsty, heavy-implied -slashy Light/L goodness. Now in drabble form!
I don't own Death Note.
Why?
L doesn't know. What he does know is this: he desperately, desperately wants to believe that Light Yagami is not Kira.
(But a good detective does not let personal feelings affect his judgement, and there is too much that says he is, he is)
He doesn't know why he allowed it to happen. Light was just there and he was smiling, a real honest smile that L clung to.
(because Kira couldn't smile like that, how could an individual harbour so much hate and smile like that? Except Kira could and Light Yagami could)
And so L had laid back and let it happen, had not protested (though his mind rebelled) and let Light Yagami get closer than anyone else ever had.
(because surely Kira couldn't, Kira couldn't, Kira could)
And afterwards L had lain awake, feeling sick, with one dread certainty weighing on his mind. He remembers Light's smile, but he also remembers Light's smirk when he thought L wasn't looking.
(L hates Kira because he is a murderer, but he hates Light Yagami more, because the sting of injustice is nothing compared to the agony of betrayal.)
