Challenge Fic Entry for lj-chibichaossama
Title: Pulchritudinous
Rating: PG-15 (Pervert Dictionary! o.o)
Theme: A Dictionary
Pairing: Sheena/Raine
If a dictionary was capable of thought, it would've thought it was the luckiest dictionary in the world. It wasn't everyday that a voluptuous maiden with a very low, nearly nonexistent neckline bent over it to stroke its pages.
"Pu-Pulchri-Pulchri-" The women stuttered, unable to pronounce the word, much less spell it.
"Are you still having trouble, Sheena?" If a dictionary was capable of recognizing familiar voices, this one would've recognized the voice as the professor Raine's. She was the usual page-stroker, and the object of the dictionary's fantasies. If a dictionary could have fantasies that is.
"Why'd you make look up this stupid word anyway! Why can't you just tell me what pul-pulchrit-"
"Pulchritudinous?"
"Right. Pulchritudi-" Sheena stumbled at the last syllable.
"Oh, I thought you said that my 'insults' didn't bother you." The professor stressed the word 'insults,' which the other woman apparently didn't catch.
"Your insults didn't bother me at all!" The summoner insisted. "I just don't want you filling Lloyd's head with lies!"
"Lloyd asked me what I thought about you, and I told him," Raine calmly replied.
"Well, you didn't have to insult me with big words when I'm not even there!"
"You were there. You were eavesdropping, remember?"
At this point, if the dictionary was capable of feeling, it would've felt left out. Perhaps even enough that it would attempt to open to the correct page as some form of assist to the large-breasted woman. But that would mean no more page stroke-age and that would be bad.
Fortunately the vocabulary-challenged women decided to resume her task of pleasuring the dictionary. Which the perverted book would've enjoyed very much if it were capable of enjoying things.
"P-u-l-k-"
Sighing in frustration, Raine offered some advice. "Honestly, Sheena. It's spelled with a 'c' not a 'k.'"
"I knew that!" The girl returned to the task of finding the impossibly long word. The dictionary offered no help as any form of help would bring about the end of the page-stroking. And as said before, that would be very NOT good.
"Do you need my assistance?" The teacher asked.
Sheena turned to snap at the offender, "I'm not one of your students you know!" Returning to the dictionary, she scanned over the pages for a few moments. After a few seconds she turned back, "How do you spell it again?"
Smirking, Raine sat down next to Sheena and pulled the heavy volume towards them.
At this point, if the dictionary was capable of thinking it was the luckiest dictionary in the world, it would've rethought that statement. It was the luckiest dictionary in the universe.
"Now, you know what letter it starts with P, so why are you in the Cs?"
"I was...checking...Can't be too careful."
The agitated professor say nothing as she flipped to the right section.
If it was possible, the dictionary would've moaned. Loudly. Really loud. Disturbingly loud. Loud enough that no-one, even the most innocent, could've mistaken it for anything other than pure ecstasy.
Just when the dictionary would've promoted itself to the luckiest dictionary of all time, past, present and future, the page-stroking stopped.
The two women had shifted their attention from the well-used book to each other. After a few moments of just staring Raine finally moved. She kissed Sheena on the lips.
The dictionary continued on with its promotion, and it was enjoying every minute of it. If it was possible for a inanimate object to spontaneously combust, it would've done so.
Suddenly, Sheena broke off. She shut the dictionary closed, (rather harshly) and flung it into a nearby bush.
The dictionary would've screamed if it had the vocal chords necessary. It also added a loud "OW!"
Oh wait, that was just Zelos getting hit in the head with a very large book.
"ZELOS!" The irate summoner shouted at the top of her lungs. "What the hell do you think your doing peeking on us!"
The injured chosen replied, "Why'd ya throw that book at me? Can't a guy watch his two favorite hunnies make-out in peace?"
"Zelos..." The teacher hissed in the most threatening way possible as she stalked towards the peeking tom.
"Hey...Wait a min-What are doing with that-! AAAGH!" THWACK!
Sheena just stared at the carnage. "Wow. I didn't know you could use a dictionary for that."
"There are many different uses for dictionaries. Looking up words and beating straying eyes are only two uses." Smiling she asked, "Now where were we in our previous lesson?"
pul-chri-tu-di-nous
adj.
Characterized by or having great physical beauty and appeal.
Definition stolen borrowed from
