Disclaimer: The CSI characters do not belong to me, I am just borrowing
them.
The Hardest Word
Chapter One - The Card
He was nervous. Though never fond of interacting with people, he had placed himself in this situation. It had felt like the right thing to do. It still did. But he was still nervous, unsure of what was expected of him; how he should act; what he should say. So for now, he was standing in front of the fireplace admiring the many cards lined up along it. People moved in the room behind him, greeting, joking, laughing. He continued browsing. One card caught his eye, the words "Merry Christmas Sexy" across the top. Who could have sent it? It must be a joke. She would have told him if she had anyone special in her life. Wouldn't she?
To read it would be intrusive. To ask her about it might seem suspicious. She would wonder why he was so curious. He wondered why he was so curious. However, this train of thought was interrupted mid-journey when a small hand tugged on his jacket.
"Uncle Grissom," a soft child's voice said.
He looked to his side. She was standing looking up at him, a smile on her face and a twinkle in her eyes, revealing the happiness and excitement in her heart. This was her favourite time of year. She looked forward to it for months, writing her Christmas list in July, singing carols from August and, in September, starting to complain because the shops weren't yet selling Christmas cards for her to send to her friends. Now the day she had been waiting for had almost arrived. Her presents were stacked under the tree, and her Mum's friends were here for dinner. She knew there were only a few hours to go but was not sure that she would be able to contain her excitement for that long. It was already showing on her face, and what she was about to do was not supposed to be done until Christmas Day, but she just couldn't wait.
"Uncle Grissom!" she repeated, growing quickly impatient as a result of her excitement.
"Lindsey! What can I do for you?"
"I have to whisper," she said, bright eyed and smiling.
He lowered himself to her level and she leaned towards his ear.
"I have a present for you."
"Have you?" He said, adding curiosity to his voice to join in her game.
"Yes. And I think you should open it now."
Grissom turned to her and smiled. "I don't think your Mum would be very pleased if I did. She might tell me off."
"You're her boss. She can't tell you off," she replied, showing wisdom that was above her years but, unfortunately, not exactly accurate. Yes, he was her boss, but she would tell him off. Many a time she had reprimanded him, and rightly so. He was her superior only in title. They were a team. He couldn't run the nightshift without her. At least, he believed he couldn't, but he knew he didn't want to try.
"Oh, she would tell me off. And I don't want that. She can be scary sometimes, your Mum."
"She's not scary!" the nine year old laughed, in total disbelief that a man like Grissom could be scared of her Mum.
"She is when she tells me off. Do you not get scared when she tells you off?"
"She doesn't tell me off. I'm not naughty. You shouldn't be naughty Uncle Gil. It's bad."
In her words he heard Catherine, it was a credit to her, and a sign of her daughter's total devotion, that Lindsey firmly believed that it is bad to be naughty.
"Oh, I'm sorry. But isn't it naughty to open presents before Christmas Day?" Grissom queried.
"Not if the person who gives you the present says it's okay. And I'm giving you the present, and I say it's okay."
Logical. How could he argue with that? He knew she would have a counter argument for anything he said. But he also knew that if he opened his present, she would want to open hers from him, and that would certainly earn a telling off from Catherine. Regardless of whether he said it was okay, some presents had to be kept for the next day, and his was one of them. Before he could argue though, she had disappeared under the tree and was rooting through the gifts.
He turned back to the fireplace. His eyes went directly to that card. They focussed on it for a while, staring intensely as if he would somehow be able to see through it if he stared hard enough. However, before this succeeded, he stopped himself. He snapped out of it, as if from a daze. It was none of his business. What if it was from Eddie? What if he was trying to worm his way back into her life? No. She wouldn't have that card up if it was from him. Unless she wanted him back. She wouldn't -
"Here it is!" the voice cried, pushing a box into his hands. "Be careful with it. It is very fragile. Come sit down and open it." She took his hand and led him to the sofa. "Sit!"
He obeyed, hesitating to open the present though.
"Don't you want to open it?" she said with a hint of disappointment evident in her voice.
"I would like to save it for tomorrow" he responded, hoping that would be sufficient.
"But I won't see you tomorrow." This time disappointment filled her words and her expression. Her eyes lowered from him, all her previous excitement drained from her body.
"Okay, I'll open it now."
With this her smile returned, her eyes twinkled again, and she clapped her hands in an excited flurry.
He was just about to peel back the first piece of tape when he was stopped abruptly.
"Gil Grissom! I hope you're not trying to open your present!"
"I told him he could, Mum," Lindsey said as she ran to Catherine, "And it's from me."
"But does he want to open it tonight? He always told me that he likes to keep all his presents for Christmas Day."
"Oh, okay," she said, a little disappointed, and then she ran over to Warrick to try her charm on him while her Mum was distracted.
"What have you done to her, Gil? She wouldn't stop smiling before." She smiled and sat down next to him.
"She wanted me to open that present."
"I'd told her that you weren't to open it. She only wanted you to so she could open her present from you. You know that, right?"
"Yes I knew that. But she's very persuasive, she had a great defence for all my arguments. She's a smart kid, Cath."
"I know. Takes after her mother. Thank God," she laughed.
Thank God. Meaning 'Thank God she doesn't take after her father'? he thought. That was a good sign. It sounded like she still hated Eddie. The card wasn't from him. But she was laughing when she said it. Perhaps she was joking. Laughter reflecting fondness? No. Eddie hurt her. She wouldn't even consider taking him back. But the card was on display. It couldn't be from Eddie. So who was it from? And why did it matter?
"Grissom, are you listening?"
His thoughts were interrupted again, and he was relieved. They were starting to take him places he didn't want to go.
"Of course I'm listening," he lied.
"What was I talking about?"
Silence. She knew he wasn't listening. And he knew that she knew. Their eyes were locked. Her look, a mixture of waiting to see how he responded, letting him know that she knew he had lied, and telling him it wasn't even worth trying to lie again. The 'scary' look. Yet she looked so beautiful when she looked at him like that.
He frowned, puzzled.
She also frowned. "What?"
"Nothing. Sometimes my own thoughts surprise me."
"What were you thinking?" she smiled curiously.
"Nothing."
She knew further questioning would yield no results so she dropped the subject.
" I should check on the food." She stood to leave.
"I'll give you a hand," he offered, joining her.
"You cook?" She seemed in disbelief.
"I've cooked you breakfast!"
"Bagels. Eggs. Fruit. Not exactly Cordon Bleu."
"You've never complained before."
"I didn't say I didn't like it." She smiled proudly and led the way into the kitchen.
TBC..
The Hardest Word
Chapter One - The Card
He was nervous. Though never fond of interacting with people, he had placed himself in this situation. It had felt like the right thing to do. It still did. But he was still nervous, unsure of what was expected of him; how he should act; what he should say. So for now, he was standing in front of the fireplace admiring the many cards lined up along it. People moved in the room behind him, greeting, joking, laughing. He continued browsing. One card caught his eye, the words "Merry Christmas Sexy" across the top. Who could have sent it? It must be a joke. She would have told him if she had anyone special in her life. Wouldn't she?
To read it would be intrusive. To ask her about it might seem suspicious. She would wonder why he was so curious. He wondered why he was so curious. However, this train of thought was interrupted mid-journey when a small hand tugged on his jacket.
"Uncle Grissom," a soft child's voice said.
He looked to his side. She was standing looking up at him, a smile on her face and a twinkle in her eyes, revealing the happiness and excitement in her heart. This was her favourite time of year. She looked forward to it for months, writing her Christmas list in July, singing carols from August and, in September, starting to complain because the shops weren't yet selling Christmas cards for her to send to her friends. Now the day she had been waiting for had almost arrived. Her presents were stacked under the tree, and her Mum's friends were here for dinner. She knew there were only a few hours to go but was not sure that she would be able to contain her excitement for that long. It was already showing on her face, and what she was about to do was not supposed to be done until Christmas Day, but she just couldn't wait.
"Uncle Grissom!" she repeated, growing quickly impatient as a result of her excitement.
"Lindsey! What can I do for you?"
"I have to whisper," she said, bright eyed and smiling.
He lowered himself to her level and she leaned towards his ear.
"I have a present for you."
"Have you?" He said, adding curiosity to his voice to join in her game.
"Yes. And I think you should open it now."
Grissom turned to her and smiled. "I don't think your Mum would be very pleased if I did. She might tell me off."
"You're her boss. She can't tell you off," she replied, showing wisdom that was above her years but, unfortunately, not exactly accurate. Yes, he was her boss, but she would tell him off. Many a time she had reprimanded him, and rightly so. He was her superior only in title. They were a team. He couldn't run the nightshift without her. At least, he believed he couldn't, but he knew he didn't want to try.
"Oh, she would tell me off. And I don't want that. She can be scary sometimes, your Mum."
"She's not scary!" the nine year old laughed, in total disbelief that a man like Grissom could be scared of her Mum.
"She is when she tells me off. Do you not get scared when she tells you off?"
"She doesn't tell me off. I'm not naughty. You shouldn't be naughty Uncle Gil. It's bad."
In her words he heard Catherine, it was a credit to her, and a sign of her daughter's total devotion, that Lindsey firmly believed that it is bad to be naughty.
"Oh, I'm sorry. But isn't it naughty to open presents before Christmas Day?" Grissom queried.
"Not if the person who gives you the present says it's okay. And I'm giving you the present, and I say it's okay."
Logical. How could he argue with that? He knew she would have a counter argument for anything he said. But he also knew that if he opened his present, she would want to open hers from him, and that would certainly earn a telling off from Catherine. Regardless of whether he said it was okay, some presents had to be kept for the next day, and his was one of them. Before he could argue though, she had disappeared under the tree and was rooting through the gifts.
He turned back to the fireplace. His eyes went directly to that card. They focussed on it for a while, staring intensely as if he would somehow be able to see through it if he stared hard enough. However, before this succeeded, he stopped himself. He snapped out of it, as if from a daze. It was none of his business. What if it was from Eddie? What if he was trying to worm his way back into her life? No. She wouldn't have that card up if it was from him. Unless she wanted him back. She wouldn't -
"Here it is!" the voice cried, pushing a box into his hands. "Be careful with it. It is very fragile. Come sit down and open it." She took his hand and led him to the sofa. "Sit!"
He obeyed, hesitating to open the present though.
"Don't you want to open it?" she said with a hint of disappointment evident in her voice.
"I would like to save it for tomorrow" he responded, hoping that would be sufficient.
"But I won't see you tomorrow." This time disappointment filled her words and her expression. Her eyes lowered from him, all her previous excitement drained from her body.
"Okay, I'll open it now."
With this her smile returned, her eyes twinkled again, and she clapped her hands in an excited flurry.
He was just about to peel back the first piece of tape when he was stopped abruptly.
"Gil Grissom! I hope you're not trying to open your present!"
"I told him he could, Mum," Lindsey said as she ran to Catherine, "And it's from me."
"But does he want to open it tonight? He always told me that he likes to keep all his presents for Christmas Day."
"Oh, okay," she said, a little disappointed, and then she ran over to Warrick to try her charm on him while her Mum was distracted.
"What have you done to her, Gil? She wouldn't stop smiling before." She smiled and sat down next to him.
"She wanted me to open that present."
"I'd told her that you weren't to open it. She only wanted you to so she could open her present from you. You know that, right?"
"Yes I knew that. But she's very persuasive, she had a great defence for all my arguments. She's a smart kid, Cath."
"I know. Takes after her mother. Thank God," she laughed.
Thank God. Meaning 'Thank God she doesn't take after her father'? he thought. That was a good sign. It sounded like she still hated Eddie. The card wasn't from him. But she was laughing when she said it. Perhaps she was joking. Laughter reflecting fondness? No. Eddie hurt her. She wouldn't even consider taking him back. But the card was on display. It couldn't be from Eddie. So who was it from? And why did it matter?
"Grissom, are you listening?"
His thoughts were interrupted again, and he was relieved. They were starting to take him places he didn't want to go.
"Of course I'm listening," he lied.
"What was I talking about?"
Silence. She knew he wasn't listening. And he knew that she knew. Their eyes were locked. Her look, a mixture of waiting to see how he responded, letting him know that she knew he had lied, and telling him it wasn't even worth trying to lie again. The 'scary' look. Yet she looked so beautiful when she looked at him like that.
He frowned, puzzled.
She also frowned. "What?"
"Nothing. Sometimes my own thoughts surprise me."
"What were you thinking?" she smiled curiously.
"Nothing."
She knew further questioning would yield no results so she dropped the subject.
" I should check on the food." She stood to leave.
"I'll give you a hand," he offered, joining her.
"You cook?" She seemed in disbelief.
"I've cooked you breakfast!"
"Bagels. Eggs. Fruit. Not exactly Cordon Bleu."
"You've never complained before."
"I didn't say I didn't like it." She smiled proudly and led the way into the kitchen.
TBC..
