A/N: Hey!
This is just a short one-shot I wrote about the friendship of Lily and Remus through their Hogwarts years- I feel that there's a whole untold story there. :) Enjoy!
It's also an experiment in writing in second person, so if you think that anything could be changed to make this better, comment, please! :)
Eleven.
You're in a compartment with Severus on the Hogwarts Express when he comes in.
Your first impression is that he's a lanky, scrawny sort, but at the same time, inside the scruffy clothes, inside the hunched back, he seems quite nice. When he introduces himself as Remus Lupin, despite Severus' frown, you smile.
He is sorted into Gryffindor later that day just several minutes after you, and when Remus wanders aimlessly and sheepishly around the table of cheering Gryffindors, you wave him to an empty seat next to yours.
He smiles, and you smile back.
Twelve.
Remus, you think, is not made for lying.
Every month, he makes up a new one- My mother's sick. I need to go to the library to catch up on my potions essay. I'm going to the kitchens.
Potter and his good-for-nothing gang seem to eat the lies up, but not you. You notice.
You notice that he's sick the day before each time. You notice that he isn't in class the next day. You notice that when he is back, he is tired and hurt.
And you notice that each time he disappears for the whole night, it's on the full moon.
It doesn't take you long to put the pieces together. And when you do, you don't blame him for lying. You know the feeling too; you know the feeling of prejudice, the feeling of pain when you walk down the hall to shouts of Mudblood, the anticipatory knot in your stomach when someone asks you what your parents do, the mutters around you that it's because she's muggleborn when you fail an essay.
So you leave him alone. He'll tell you when he's ready.
Thirteen.
You never thought that you'd be friends with anyone who is friends with Potter, but it seems that your Divination skills were lacking.
Because even though Remus is friends with James Potter, you find that he is your friend too.
Well, your enemy's enemy may be your friend, but they never said anything about the friends of your friends.
You find yourself studying in the library with Remus, sitting in the common room with Remus, chatting with Remus when you're bored.
You used to think that he was all quiet and introverted. And while he still is, sometimes, you also get to see another side of Remus that not many get to see.
A mischievous side, a generous side, a more talkative side.
You learn more about Remus in your third year than you ever have before. He has a quiet sense of humor; he is fond of talking about his muggle mother; he spent his childhood travelling; his father is a world-renowned authority on non-human spirituous apparitions…
But still, he still doesn't tell you about him. And the wolf you know he turns into every full moon.
It hurts, a little. That he still doesn't trust you enough. But it is his decision, his choice to make.
Fourteen.
As you and Severus grow apart, Remus becomes your stone. Whenever Severus leaves you in tears to go with his other friends- his pureblood friends- Remus is there. There to comfort you, there to talk with you and take your mind off of things.
But in the end, avoiding the problem does nothing. You can see Severus growing closer to Malfoy, Lestrange, and their lot, and even though he remains friends with you, you can see him become colder.
And it hurts.
So in quiet retaliation, almost, you start spending more time with Remus. And it turns out to be one of the best things you ever do.
He is understanding and kind. When you feel like you're at your wit's end, he is there, to talk things out and make the world alright again. When you just need a friend to sit with, he is there, understanding you need for silence and not prying into things you want to keep to yourself.
Sometimes, you wonder how a person whom life has been so unkind to can be so kind to others.
Fifteen.
You don't know where to go.
You're angry- so angry. Angry at everyone- and at the world.
You're angry at Sev- Snape, for calling you that. You're angry at Potter and Black for bullying him, unprovoked. You're angry at Remus for not interfering.
And deep inside, you're angry at yourself. For getting caught up in this all. What if you had just stayed a muggle, like your parents, like Petunia? Then your life wouldn't be like this. You could have a loving sister. You could have a normal life.
But you don't. And there's nothing you can do about it now.
You hear the murmurs in the corridors, you see the speculative articles in the Daily Prophet- all about Voldemort.
Some people laugh him off, saying that this is just a momentary craze, that whoever Voldemort is will be unearthed and jailed soon, and his half-hearted followers will scatter as soon as he's gone.
But you know better. And you think- if the tension in the early years, at a school, is already like this, what will the world be like in the future?
And even though you're a Gryffindor, and Gryffindors are supposed to be brave, you can't help the prickle of fear that runs through your spine.
Sixteen.
You are right.
Voldemort is not a problem that will just disappear. On the contrary, his influence seems to be increasing.
Even in the safe walls of Hogwarts, Voldemort's presence seems to seep in. It makes an appearance through the growing taunts of some of the students, through the sharp cries and sobbing that follows every morning's delivery of the Daily Prophet (along with which comes the obituary section), through the feeling of fear that hangs in the air these days.
But despite it all, you remain good friends with Remus. He has been there for you through it all. He stayed loyal to you for the weeks that you ignored him after Severus's betrayal; he was there to comfort you after the black owl came bearing the news of your parent's murders; he is there when everything just becomes too much.
Your prefect duties and study sessions in the library together are a solace, a moment where you can step back from the world and just enjoy life.
Your other friends, Mary and Marlene, tease you relentlessly about you and him. And all the time you've been spending together recently. Because according to them, a girl and a boy can't just be friends.
But you know better.
Seventeen.
You constantly wonder these days if you've gone mad.
You are actually James Potter's girlfriend, right? No joke?
You don't know what possessed you to say yes to him, after six years of refusal, but whatever it was, you're thankful for it.
He's been acting much more maturely this year. Perhaps making James Head Boy wasn't such a bad idea after all. I suppose Dumbledore does know what he's doing.
And despite all the times you said you would rather date the giant squid than James, despite the encroaching danger of Voldemort, you find that you can be happy again.
You grow closer to James's friends, too. You find Peter Pettigrew adorable; you find Sirius Black annoying in an endearing way; and Remus- well, your friendship with Remus stays strong. Like always, he is always there for you.
Sometimes you wonder if you're being selfish, being happy and loved while the world around you is torn apart with prejudice and hate. But sometimes, you think that you and your friends are fighting Voldemort too, just as much as the aurors and Dumbledore. Just in a different way.
With love. Love- between friends, between lovers, between family.
When there is love, Voldemort cannot win.
And you face the rising sun with a new kind of Gryffindor courage boiling in your veins, knowing that the light will always triumph over the dark. Because you have a power in you that the dark side knows not.
