Author's Note: I do not own Hetalia or any of the characters used. I only own the plot and ideas. This is my very first fanfiction ever so please be kind. I openly accept constructive criticism of any kind, taking your time to tell me what you think means a whole lot. Thank you very much for reading.

Warnings: Lemons in later chapters, first fanfic, yaoi, boys love, angst.

Prologue

As I sit in my room, my eyes already accustomed to the darkness, I can't help but think. It's a month after my birthday now and my head is filled. I never thought so much could happen in a single year. I never thought I would feel this way again and it's almost too much for me to bear anymore. I know it's before dawn and I'm still wondering where he is. I lay back and stare up at the ceiling feeling a soft, warm, fluffy creature crawl onto the bed next to me ,"Hmmm~", he muses, his soft, high voice touching my ears for a moment.

"Hey there." I reply to his look and sit up again, pulling him into my lap and stroking his fur. I lean back against the cold headboard of my large bed and stare at the wall, stroking him out of pure reflex and let my mind wander off to what's been devouring me for weeks. And I continued to wish over and over: Let it be a lie. Let it be a dream. Please…I can't take anymore..I beg you..Bring back the love of my life…What did I do wrong? Why did he have to leave me? Why?