A/N: Requested by werepuppyblack. This came from the latest episode of True Blood (so slight spoiler alert), in which Bill declares himself as the Chosen One. I don't think Vlad would appreciate that, do you? Also includes a character from the movie/musical I Kissed a Vampire.
...
The back of Bill's hand connects with Jessica's cheek, sending her across the room. She lands in a sprawled heap before rolling onto her back and shuffling backwards as Bill looms over her.
"Who are you to defy me?" He yells, fangs extended. "I am the Chosen One. Lilith chose me!"
"Actually," a voice interrupts. Bill turns to find a young vampire – barely an adult in human years – standing in the doorway. "I think you'll find that I am the Chosen One."
"It takes a lot to get him to admit that, too," another vampire, roughly the same age as the first, smirks. "He normally gets all angst-ridden over it."
"Trey," the boy warns, and the other – Trey – rolls his eyes.
"Excuse me," Bill straightens up and strides over to them. "But who the hell are you?"
Another vampire speaks this time. Older. "Vladimir Dracula IV. Son and heir of Count Dracula. Chosen One. Newly appointed Grand High Vampire."
"I prefer Vlad," he says.
"That was all a myth. Just a story to make us behave," Bill says, though his eyes widen.
"Well, then. I look pretty good for a myth, don't you think?" Vlad gives a crooked smile.
"Hey, can we punish people for progeny abuse?" Trey asks. They look over to find him helping Jessica to her feet. "Because that sucked, dude."
"Possibly. I'll see what I can do." Bill's eyes flick between them and he swallows almost nervously. "But for now, Trey? Don't you have something else to do?"
"Right," he turns to one of the guards escorting them. "Yo, dude. Where do you keep the prisoners?"
The guard frowns and looks at Vlad, who sighs. "I order the release of Pamela Swynford De Beaufort."
"On what grounds?" Bill frowns.
"She's my PR's... Aunt, I suppose," Vlad shrugs, nodding towards Trey.
"This way, sir," the guard turns and walks back the way they came, heading for the elevator.
"Drop the 'sir' crap, bro," Trey follows him, but not before flashing Jessica a fangy grin. "I'll catch up with you later, gorgeous."
If it wasn't bad enough, Salome enters then, frowning when Trey winks at her as he passes. "What is the meaning of this?"
"Chancellor Agrippa," Vlad gives a slight nod and the woman freezes.
"Your Grandness," Salome greets him with uncertainty in her eyes. "I was not aware that you would be joining us."
"You didn't exactly leave me much choice," he frowns. "Bombing Tru Blood factories?"
"Sire, I-"
"We know it was you, Salome," the oldest of the group speaks up.
"Bertrand," she scowls. "What a surprise." The corner of Bertrand's mouth twitches slightly.
"Apparently we need to talk," Vlad walks over to the large table that takes up part of the room and sits in the chair at the head of it. "Where's Roman?"
Salome glances to Bill at that, who seems to get over his confusion to reply. "The Guardian is unavailable."
Vlad takes in their shared look and groans, for a moment showing that he really is a teenager, and leans back. "You've got to be kidding me."
