The Bin Laden VS ???? series.
Bin Laden VS Nemesis
Somewhere in Afghanistan:
-Aaaaaaaaaarrrrrgh!
An angry scream seemed to shaken the whole cave.
Bin Laden was wandering restless around. His men carefully backed away. Some of them tried to calm him down, but they soon wished that they never did...
-I'm sick of sitting in this cave! Bin Laden suddenly shouted.
-Well... you should have thought about that before you... a small guy with a big gun said.
-Before I...? Bin Laden pierced him with his eyes.
-Err... Never mind!
-I'm sick of you useless, unintelligent lunatics, I'm sick of sitting in this cave, I'm sick of...
-Sick of hiding from the Americans? someone suggested.
-YES! I'M SICK OF HIDING! Bin Laden screamed.
-You don't have to scream, you know. We're not deaf. another one of the terrorists mumbled and prayed that Bin Laden hadn't heard what he said.
But he had heard it perfectly...
-I'M NOT SCREAMING! I'M ONLY SPEAKING LOUD! UNDERSTOOD?! he screamed to the poor man. The man held his arms up as defence. But to his surprise Bin Laden turned around and started walking back and forth again.
-Uhhh... Boss? I have to ask... the small guy began.
-Not now! I'm thinking!
-Is that even possible? an terrorist in the back of the room mumbled sarcastically for himself.
After several minutes, Bin Laden stopped.
-Why didn't I come up with this before? All I have to do is to disguise myself...
The other terrorists looked at each other and sighed, but they didn't say a word.
Later, outside:
-I have the feeling of someone's stalking me. Bin Laden whispered to his bodyguard.
-Well, that shouldn't be so wierd. After all you are the worlds most wanted man... the bodyguard replied.
Bin Laden picked up a stick and whacked him.
-This is different...
-America's new secret weapon?
Bin Laden whacked him again.
Suddenly a deep, raspy voice groaned:
-O-S-A-M-A!!!
Bin Laden looked around nervously.
-Wh.... what... what was tha... that?
-How the hell should I know? All I know for sure is that it seems to be after you... the bodyguard shrugged his shoulders.
-O-S-A-M-A!!!
Bin Laden hided behind his bodyguard.
-Do something!
-Not before you promise never to hit me again! was the wise reply.
-How dare you! Bin Laden began.
Then a huge monster, dressed in a black trench coat appeared. It stared at them with one eye. It pointed the rocket launcher melted into its arm at Bin Laden.
-O-S-A-M-A!!! It said with raspy voice.
-Ok! Ok! I promise I'll never hit you again!! Bin Laden cried.
-Ha ha! Fooled ya! Handle this yourself, I'm not risking my own life to save your poor ass! Bye bye! the bodyguard ran away, leaving Bin Laden alone with the Nemesis.
-O-S-A-M-A!!
-Holy shit! Bin Laden ran after the bodyguard.
When he reached his cave, he was exhausted.
-I'm never leaving this cave again! he panted and went inside.
The other terrorists looked surprised at him when he walked in.
His bodyguard grinned.
-Is it you?! We hoped you were... Err... I mean... we thought you were dead.
Bin Laden snorted and went to his "living room". He sat down on the floor and breathed out after the shock of meeting that monster.
-I'm safe. he mumbled.
He shouldn't have said that...
-O-S-A-M-A!!!
-NO!! It can't be!
Bin Laden ran deeper into the cave.
-It will never find me here. he said and leaned against the cold stonewall.
-O-S-A-M-A!!!
-Oh no...
There was nowhere to run now. He was trapped.
He stared in horror on the monstrous creature that came out from the shadows. He noticed that the other terrorists came after it, holding flashlights so they could see better. They made a circle around Bin Laden and the Nemesis and started whistling and cheering.
-Nemesis! Nemesis! Nemesis! they cheered.
-Thanks a lot guys! Bin Laden shouted in an angry tune. –That really made me feel better!
Nemesis took a step towards him. It raised its rocket launcher.
-Hey! This is unfair! I'm unarmed! Bin Laden protested.
Someone threw in Bin Laden's personal AK-47.
-Ohhh!! That will probably scare the shit out of him! Bin Laden said sarcastically and picked up the gun.
-Well, at least in not unarmed... he mumbled to himself.
-Nemesis! Nemesis! Nemesis!
-Shut up please! My self-confidence is at the bottom already!
-O-S-A-M-A!!
-Nemesis! Nemesis! Nemesis!
-Aaaargh!
Bin Laden started firing his AK-47 at the Nemesis. The monster didn't seem to notice. It just kept going.
-Eat this you son of a bitch!
CLICK CLICK CLICK
-Damn!
Bin Laden looked up at the towering monster.
-O-S-A-M-A!!
-Help anyone!
The other terrorists looked at each other and then they bursted out in laughter.
-Fuck you guys!
-Nemesis! Nemesis! Nemesis! Nemesis! they shouted louder than before.
-I'm doomed... Bin Laden said as the monster grabbed him and lifted him up.
The Nemesis studied him for a second and then threw him into the wall.
CRACK
-Ahahahaaaargh!! My back!
The Nemesis came towards him again and grabbed him by the arm.
-O-S-A-M-A!!!
CRACK
The terrorists knew what came up next and turned around. They didn't want to see this.
-Mommy! I want my mommy!! Bin Laden cried when he saw the Nemesis point the rocket launcher at him again. The Nemesis took aim and...
KA-BLAM!!! SPLAT!!!
-Ohhhh.... the terrorists said when they turned back and saw the remains of Bin Laden smeared on the wall. Only the turban was left.
The Nemesis glared at them. Then it aimed...
-Run!!!!
They started to run the way they came from.
-KA-BLAM!
Nemesis walked over the dead bodies of the terrorists on its way out of the cave.
-D-E-A-D-O-S-A-M-A!!! It said happily and ran away.
To be continued....
Ahhh... that felt good. I just had to kill that bastard in some fic! And here is what I came up with: The Bin Laden VS ???? series.
First one out was Nemesis. Who will kill Osama in the next story? You can choose characters from Resident Evil, Silent Hill, Metal Gear Solid, Tekken, Animorphs, Lucky Luke (he he), Worms (ha ha ha!) or we can have a car from Gran Turismo run over him...
The character/car who gets most votes will be in the next story.
E-mail me on: Ninjalinda@techfreak.to
Ninjalinda
