"I-I can't.. I can't take your pain…" He sobbed.

"It's because it doesn't hurt" She smiled at him.

He stared at her, looking at her. He could see it in her face. She was letting go.

"No" his voice cracked. He was trying his best to be strong but it wasn't working. This isn't happening, he tried to tell himself.

"It's okay".

"Allison". He tried once more, hoping and praying she allowed him to help her in any way he could.

"It's okay... It's okay" She said in small sobs.

This was it. He could feel it. There was no point in being strong anymore. He began to cry. He didn't want to let her go.

"It's okay. It's perfect. I'm in the arms of my first love. The first person I've ever loved… The person I'll always love. I love you… Scott Mccall"

There were the words he's been dying to hear. The words he's been aching to hear from her. Yet, in this very moment, he was losing her all over again. The emotions and tears drowned out his voice and before he could tell her he loved her back. She was gone…

Flashback ends*

Scott woke up, covered in cold sweats and face wet from tears. He closes his eyes and tried to steady his breathing. He's been having the same dream every night since Allison died. Every single fucking night. It's gotten so bad that he constantly had bags under his eyes - too exhausted but never enough to give him a peaceful night of sleep. In his dreams, he'll do everything he could to save her (every scenario you could possibly think of) but no matter what he did, the end result was always the same; She would end up dying in his arms.

He turned to look at the clock. 4:30 am. 4 hours of sleep has got to be a new record for him. Nowadays, He never could seem to sleep for more than 3 hours anymore. He got up out of bed and threw on some work out clothes. There was no point in trying to go back to sleep now. He only had about two hours and a half left before he had to go to school anyways. Morning jogs always seemed to help him feel better; it wasn't a permanent fix but the temporary relief was enough to keep him going for another day.

When he got outside he started to run - slow at first but then picking up speed. He felt the cool breeze hit his skin. It felt good to be alone with his own thoughts. Eventually, he found himself on her trail unintentionally. He always ended up here no matter how much he tried to avoid it. He slowed downed, caught his breath and looked around. She used always go on a run in these parts of the woods. No matter what he did to try to escape her, he always ends up back to her. So many memories in these woods..

Flashback*

He looked at her walking in the woods, inching closer and closer to her. He didn't think he was making much noise. Actually, he thought he was being pretty stealthy. Before he knew it, a surge of electricity rushed through his body. He fell to the ground in pain. His body continued to shake and he couldn't stop it.

"Scott?" He could hear the shock in her voice. "Oh my god, Scott!". Her footsteps were getting closer and before he knew it she was by his side.

"Trigger… Finger…" He manages to bark out. Finally he felt the electricity stop and the pain slowly subsided. Thank god for his werewolf healing abilities.

She was kneeling by his side, her eyes filled with concern.

"I'm so sorry" she said apologetically.

"No it's my fault. Totally my fault". He mentally cursed himself. He hasn't spoken to her in weeks and this had to be their first interaction. Way to go Mccall.

"Are you okay?". She sounded so guilty.

"Yeah. I'm fine" his body started to twitch.

"I didn't know it was you… If i had known it was you…" She rambled on before he cut her off.

"You would have still pulled the trigger?" He tried to make a small joke.

"NO of course not." She gave a small giggle. "Seriously, I'm-I'm so sorry". She helped him pull the taser wires off of him.

"Are you sure you're okay?" She asked one more time.

"Yeah" he said quickly. "I think so"

When he slowly pulled himself up, he could see her smirking.

"What were you doing here anyways? Were you following us?"

"No… Not at all… Your dad told me that you run this trail sometimes.. I was hoping to get you alone".

"By following me" she gave him a smile that showed off those deep dimples.

"Well… Yeah". He gave her a half smile back. It was felt so good to have a normal conversation with her again.

Flashback ends*

Scott could feel the emotions take over him as the dull ache in his chest started to grow stronger. Pull yourself together Mccall. He was not going to do this right now. Not today. He started to jog back home, running away from the memories. When he got home, he hopped right into the shower and got dressed for school. He had about half an hour left to spare before he had to go to school. He made a promise to himself that he would start the school year off strong because he knew Allison would have wanted the best for him and wallowing in his own sorrows wasn't it. He walked into the kitchen and saw his mother making coffee.

"Mind if I have a cup" he asked quietly, putting on his "happy" face. He knew by the look on her face that she could see right through him.

She poured him some coffee in a cup, no sugar or cream, just the way he liked it now. Since Allison's death, black coffee seem to be Scott's new best friend. Bitter and strong.

"How are you feeling sweetie?" She asked cautiously, trying her best to offer some sort of comfort for her son.

Scott sat quietly, avoiding his mother's gaze. He could lie and say he was fine but he knew his mother could see how broken he was. So he chose to not say anything at all. Partly because of pride. Mainly because he had no clue how to put whatever he was feeling into words.

"Sweetie…" Melissa Mccall walked up to him and pulled him into a tight embrace. She could feel him start to cry and it broke her heart. She started to feel tears form in her own eyes. Allison's death was still fresh and if she were honest, she loved Allison too. The girl made such an impact on her son's happiness and that's what all mothers want for their children.

"I need you to tell me what you want Scott. What do you need? It's killing me to see you like this son" Her voice cracked due to her forcing herself to be the strong one in this situation.

He pulled away from her hug and looked at her with sad eyes. He knew his mother's intentions were good and the last thing he wanted was his mother to worry about him. God knows the woman worked hard enough to keep the roof over his head and food on the table. He really wish that he could feel better, turn his emotions off but how do you really get over something like this. It took him a minute to find the courage to be honest.

"I just want her back, mom" he dropped his head in defeat. "I need her back", he said quietly as he continues to sob. He hated acknowledging that Allison was dead. When he said things like that, he is reminded that she's gone forever and that this is real.

After a few minutes of crying, he took a deep breath. He wiped away his tears. Crying isn't going to change anything, he reminded himself. Scott looked at his mom who was filled with tears herself and gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek before turning away. He grabbed his car keys off the table and swung his backpack over his shoulders. It was time for school. If there was anything he learned over the past few months was that life goes on. He had to continue to live his life, even if half of him died with Allison that night.