'I've failed her...'

This was the only thought in Joel's mind for the longest time. Ellie was saying something to him, probably denials of what was going to happen, but Joel didn't pay attention. What he had to worry about now was if Ellie would make it to Salt Lake City or not.

Joel had always wished it wouldn't come to this-to him lying, unable to move, as Ellie frantically tried figuring out a way to help him. He at least wanted to get her to Salt Lake before anything happened to him, but falling on a huge rusty nail back at UEC didn't exactly help with those plans.

Now he was laying next to a tiny fire; his stomach stitched up sloppily by Ellie. They had no way of thoroughly disinfecting the wound, so for now the stitches were purely cosmetic. Every time he moved it was like getting impaled all over again. Even the slightest twitch made his stomach sore for what felt like an eternity afterward.

Ellie repeated, jolting him out of his own little world, "You're gonna make it."

"No..." It was more of a grunt than a fully-formed word. He continued, "This ain't healin'-anytime soon. It ain't healin' at all, Ellie." Joel paused, letting the pain ease itself away, "Now you gotta listen t' me-"

"No. Joel, you're gonna make it." Ellie stared at him firmly. She unzipped his backpack and went rifling through it, pulling a half-empty bottle of rubbing alcohol from it. His eyes widened, knowing what she was fixing to do. "...Just...wait. I'm beyond healin' now. Now listen."

Ellie opened her mouth to make up a retort, but finally thought better of it.

"Now..." he had to pause again, "...I ain't gonna make it through this one." He turned his head to face her, and he could see her eyes begin to well up a little-just like at the ranch house in Wyoming. He continued, "So you gotta learn to take care a' yourself."

She nodded slightly, hands still clutching the bottle of rubbing alcohol.

Joel inhaled deeply, "...You don't trust anyone. Even the Fireflies. Marlene's the only one you can trust now." He felt awful having to do this to her. It made him regret not teaching her more about surviving on your own before. Now he had to give her a rush job-a quick once-over-and hope she remembered.

Ellie screwed the cap off the bottle now-she wasn't giving up on him. Not yet.

"So if you cross paths with anyone else, you haul ass outta there if you can. If that's not an option, you throw all the Molotovs you can at 'em, then run. Y'know how t' make one a' those, right?"

She nodded.

"Good." He stopped. The pain was getting to be a little too much at the moment, all that talking was tiring, and she was probably getting the gist of what he wanted to tell her. Ellie watched him for a few more moments, then went back to rifling through his pack-this time procuring a strip of cloth normally used for bandages. She poured some rubbing alcohol on it, hesitating before slowly lifting Joel's shirt to expose the wound. Ellie wrinkled her nose at it and said a quick, "Ick-" before gently dabbing away at it.

Meanwhile, Joel's abdomen was burning like she'd set it on fire. He tried biting back a loud groan, but it was no use. The pain was far too strong to keep quiet. He grit his teeth, breathing heavily. It took awhile for the fiery sensation to subside, and when it finally did he said, "...I...I appreciate it, but I ain't gettin' through this one, Ellie."

"No. Just...fucking shut up, okay? You'll be fine."

"It's festered too much." He looked back at her, seeing her angrily close up the bottle. "We're just gonna have to wait this one out," Joel finished. He managed to reach his hand out a few inches further, and Ellie simply looked at it. "Don't do this to me, Joel."

"'M sorry." He knew exactly what she was thinking: that she was wrong about him. That he was going to leave her just like everyone else before him.

He saw Ellie's hand fidget a little, finally resting gently in his palm. From then on they were silent...waiting for the moment when Joel's chest stopped rising and falling, and Ellie was alone...once again.