This Just In!

Time: During the events at the end of Return of The Jedi

Place: Corusc- er, Imperial City as it was known then.

Summary: Transcript of Imperial HoloNet Action News Special Report

[BREAKING NEWS

Sy Evran: Citizens of the Galactic Empire, we interrupt regular programing to bring you an exclusive breaking news coming from the Far Moon of Endor. We have just received word that Emperor Palpatine has been severely injured, if not mortally wounded in an attempt on his life by Rebellion leaders. It has been reported that an attack is in progress at the construction of the second Death Star the Empire has developed in the last eighteen years. The original Death Star, as you may recall was destroyed by members of the Rebel Alliance a few years ago.

In an innocent tour of the pre-constructed facilities this week, the Emperor sought to oversee the results from the hard workers that the Empire has to offer. It seems that the tour has been disrupted by Rebel scu-, er...loyalists who are in the vicinity. In addition, there are also reports of Rebels on the surface of the Far Moon of Endor which houses the complex that supplies the energy shield protecting the unfinished Death Star. It is apparent that the Rebels are making a weak attempt at destroying this complex.

We have no information as of yet on the condition of the Emperor, but...yes?. We are just getting in something now...[sighs. My fellow citizens of the Galactic Empire...it is with a heavy heart that I must inform you that Emperor Palpatine has perished in a blast over Endor that has been unconfirmed at this point to be the complete destruction of the second Death Star. [takes a moment As I sit here and reflect on the extraordinary human being that was Emperor Palpatine, I am reminded of all he has done for our galaxy. He will be missed.

(shows image of Emperor Palpatine with the years – 82BBY – 4ABY)

Sy Evran: It has also been reported that the Emperor's right hand man, Lord Darth Vader, has also died in the blast. This is a sad day for the Empire. Now, as I understand my producer, we have a live feed from the Imperial Palace. Let us look in and see how they are coping with this tremendous loss.

(shows image of Imperial Palace with thousands of humans and non-humans gathering and cheering)

Sy: Why...what is this? Do we have the correct feed? Why are they cheering? Perhaps we are misinterpreting their cries of pain.

(shows several citizens surrounding Palpatine's statue preparing to topple it)

Sy: This is preposterous! Imperial troops should be there putting a stop to this. Tarkin's ghost! Have they no shame? No honor? What? Yes, we now have more reports coming in locally that there is rioting going on in the Imperial capital. This is a travesty! What? Great, we have one of our HoloNet Imperial Action News corespondents, Mas Adema, at the edge of this chaos. Mas! Can you hear me?

(run feed through Cam B)

Mas Adema: Yes, Sy, I can hear you, but barely. As you can see behind me the Imperial Palace is being overrun by humans and non-humans in an apparent celebration. Destruction reigns all around, yet this crowd's mood is clearly joyful. This is how the public reacts to the murder of a great man.

Sy: Mas, can you see any evidence of Imperial troops?

Mas: None as of yet. They will have no small task weeding through this enormous crowd. I am sure the Imperial stormtroopers are on their way to settle this in their own way.

Sy: I have no doubt.

Mas: Wait, there's an old man there about to deface a poster of the Emperor. Let's go see what is on his mind.

(Cam B follows Mas to old man)

Mas: Sir! Sir, Mas Adema here reporting for Imperial Action News. Tell me what is going through your mind as you heard this tragic news about the Emperor[thrusts mic in old man's face

Old man: Tragic? What galaxy are you from? The Empire is dead! We're free. Yippee!

Mas: Pardon me for saying, sir, but do you think this attitude is appropriate in light of what has happened? Besides which, the Emperor had banned the phrase, yippee, quite some time ago.

Old man: I know! Yippee! And what do you mean inappropriate? The Emperor was evil. There, I can finally say it! Now, if you will excuse me, I'm going to help them take down that (beep)-ing statue. (Old man runs off)

Mas: I'm sorry but we had to edit the language on his last comment. Sy, it is a sad state of affairs here in Imperial City. A great man who has given this galaxy so much has died and is treated this way.

Sy: I cannot believe it either, Mas. Though, despite what that old man said, the Empire is far from dead. I believe that even as we speak, one of the Emperor's most trusted overlords, Ysanne Isard, is poised to take over the Empire's affairs.

Mas: You are correct, Sy. I am sure she will make these Rebel sympathizers rue the day they crossed the Empire.

Sy: Mas, are there more culprits of vandalism down there you can try to speak with?

Mas: Several. Let's see. Ah, here is a Twi'lek woman helping to topple the Emperor's statue. (Cam B follows Mas to Twi'lek) Miss! Miss, if you would please, I am Mas Adema of the-

Twi'lek: I know who you are. Can't you see I'm busy?

Mas: I see that. But, can you tell me why you are destroying property of the Empire?

Twi'lek: Because the Empire destroyed our lives!

Mas: My good Twi'lek woman, Emperor Palpatine brought the galaxy together as no other had before him. He rid us of the squabbling Republic and the traitorous Jedi.

Twi'lek: He didn't bring my people anything. We spent years of degrading service parading ourselves in front of the elite human officers of the Imperial Army. I would rather have the squabbling back over a dictatorship. And I have never believed the Jedi were traitors as Palpatine wanted us to believe. I'm old enough to remember the great Aayla Secura and she was no traitor. I remember listening to that first speech Palpatine gave introducing us to his Galactic Empire in the old Council Chamber. I saw then that he was no different than any other politician, saying one thing and doing another. My people of Ryloth never could have a say because we were an inferior alien race. So don't give me that (beep) about Palpatine bringing the galaxy together for peace. He brought it together for his own power. Now, if you'll excuse me, I think we've got this gen'sai statue almost down.

(The Twi'lek and the rest of the rioters succeed in rocking the statue back and forth and finally it topples on to the grand staircase of the Palace, crumbling into pieces. The rioters cheer.)

Mas: There you have it, Sy. A horrific reaction to Palpatine's death. I certainly hope this is not widespread.

Sy: Then prepare to be disappointed, Mas. We are just getting in reports of similar celebrations by Imperial garrisons across the galaxy on various systems. From main worlds such as Borealis and Corellia to desolate Mid to Outer Core worlds such as Tatooine and Naboo. Incidently, it is ironic that they are celebrating on Naboo, for that was the birthplace of Emperor Palpatine.

(sounds of laser fire)

Sy: Ah, I hear the sound of stormtroopers in the area.

Mas: That's right, Sy. I am witnessing a squad of troopers now on the scene and they are currently, how shall we say...rehabilitating the crowd.

(scenes of fallen rioters being shot with cries of pain.)

Stormtrooper (approaching Mas): I must order you to switch that cam off now. There is nothing to see here. We have the situation under control.

Mas: Yes, of course. Let's go back to the outskirts of the Palace and...wait. Is that someone being carried on a stretcher from inside the Palace? Quickly, let's catch up to them.

(Cam B follows Mas toward two men carrying a young beautiful woman with light reddish hair who is comatose.)

Mas: Gentlemen, can you tell us what happened to this woman?

Gentleman carrier 1: I have no clue. Some guy found her like this.

Mas: Is she awake? Can we speak to her? Did one of the rioters do this to her?

Gentleman carrier 2: Hey, look, we've got to get her to the Med Center fast. You can see she's unconscious. The man behind us is the one who found her. Talk to him so we can get this girl out of this mess.

Mas (turns to the man behind them): Sir, you are the one who found her?

Man who found woman: Yes, sir, that was me. By the way, my name is Anid Hah, custodian for the Imperial Palace.

Mas: Custodian. You mean you're the janitor?

Anid: That's right. You could say I've been cleaning up the Empire's crap for years. Hey, is this going out to the entire HoloNet?

Mas: Yes it is.

Anid (waves): Hi Mom!

Mas: Tell us how you found the woman, Anid.

Anid: I've seen her around the Palace occasionally. (lowers voice) I think she was the Emperor's favorite mistress. It was all quiet before this all started and then I heard screaming from the opposite room where I was cleaning. As soon as I got to her, she was already dropping to the floor.

Mas: She didn't say anything?

Anid: Now that you mentioned it, she did mutter something before she passed out. Kill the Sky Watcher, or something. (beep) if I know what that means. Oh, sorry.

Mas: You said this was before the riots. Was this before the announcement that the Emperor was dead?

Anid: Yeah. After I called the medics it had to be at least twenty standard minutes before the announcement. Then all Hell broke loose.

Mas: You can say that again.

Anid: Uh...all Hell broke loose.

Mas: Fine. What are your thoughts on the Emperor's demise?

Anid: Well, now I've been the custodian here for some time now. I hear and see things most people don't realize. I saw how the Emperor would rule by fear and intimidation. That isn't the way to lead. I suspect people are out there celebrating because they don't have to be afraid anymore.

Mas: That's interesting. What do you have to say about the new leader, Ysanne Isard?

Anid: Does she use the Force? Because I have to tell you, the Emperor and his right hand, Vader, were some freaky men. I don't think the new Empire's leaders will have as much control as those two kooks did. Eventually, I think the Rebels will be taking over any day now.

Mas: You do realize you just said that on the Imperial HoloNet.

Anid: Yeah. So?

Stormtrooper (approaching Anid): Sir, you will come with us. This way.

Anid: What? What for?

Stormtrooper: We can discuss that later.

Anid: Hey, I'm not going anywhere with you. I've been custodian here for too long for you troops to question me. Did you think you'd have to shoot me?

Stormtrooper (after shooting Anid): If it comes to that, sir.

Mas: You...you killed him?

Stormtrooper: No, just stunned. Ok, clear this area. And shut that cam off.

Mas: Ok, I think we're done here. This is Mas Adema reporting from Imperial Palace on a dismal day for the Empire. Back to you Sy.

(cut back to Sy in studio)

Sy: Thank you, Mas. And it truly is a dismal day for the Empire. However, seeing our fine, well-trained Imperial stormtroopers take that delusional man to be rehabilitated was a positive sight of the new Empire to come. Yes, citizens of the Galactic Empire, Emperor Palpatine and Darth Vader may have perished, but the Empire will live on. From Imperial HoloNet Action News, this is Sy Evran saying fare thee well in your future.

(SIGN OFF)