TITLE: Patronus [1/4]
AUTHOR: Samantha [kali_neba@hotmail.com]
DISTRIBUTION: Azkaban's Lair. Anyone else, please ask first.
SPOILERS: All four books. Set the summer after GoF
RATING/CONTENT: eventual NC-17, PG for now, eventual Sirius/Remus, language, sex (all the good things in life ;)
SUMMARY: Sirius lies low at Lupin's and heals a little in the process. Sirius's POV
DISCLAIMER: Not mine. Sirius, Remus, and related characters belong to JK Rowling. No infringement intended.
**************************
// "Dementors are among the foulest creatures that walk this earth. They infest the darkest, filthiest places, they glory in decay and despair, they drain peace, hope, and happiness out of the air around them." -- Remus Lupin, _Prisoner of Azkaban_ //
**************************
Most wizards don't realize that magic has a distinctive scent that is exclusive to the user. Dumbledore's power smells faintly of lemons and lukewarm tea. Harry's smells like sweat and an undercurrent of blood. Most wizards just don't have the senses to understand that fact. I've spent enough time as a dog the past decade that it's second nature now, even when I'm not in my animagus form. It's a hell of a lot easier to track someone using their magic scent than their normal one.
Which is what I was doing here. Tracking, searching. Dumbledore hadn't exactly told me where Remus was, and I'd been sure not to ask when I had written to Remus after my escape. I would have been too tempted to stop and visit and stay far longer than I should, getting us both killed or shipped to Azkaban. I'd just found him again, and I'm certain I could deal with losing him. So, I contented myself with letters back and forth.
In the end, that decision not to endanger Remus left me searching the forests of southern Scotland where Dumbledore supposedly owned a cottage at some point. Arabella had been no help at all, merely giving me a sympathetic look and my body weight in food before pushing me out the door claiming that I was upsetting her cats. I suppose I could have just owled Remus and asked, but there's little adventure in that and, besides, I'd only been looking for a week. If I didn't find him by the time the moon rose tonight, I'd break down and find an owl to send.
Luckily, shortly after resolving to owl Remus, the wind shifted, and I'd caught the scent I'd been searching for this past week. Chocolate, wood smoke, and freshly turned earth. Remus. I barked happily, paws skidding in the mud as a changed direction and headed off of the dirt road I'd been traveling and down a small, nearly hidden bike path through the trees. I ran down the path at a full run, tongue lolling out of my mouth, breath coming in a pant.
I caught sight of the front gate covered in ivy and let out another bark, louder this time, to alert the resident of my arrival. Six feet away from the gate, and I felt it. An icy trail down my back, and suddenly, I felt like I was back in that dank cell with those things staring at me. I growled softly, head down, tail curling around my hind legs. I whimpered, my haunches rising as shadows slide between the trees, and three Dementors glided onto the path. They headed towards me, spreading out, blocking the path and any chance of escape. I was panicking. I could feel the despair welling inside of my mind, and any second, it was going to become impossible for me to hold my dog form.
Suddenly a hand clamped down on the scruff of my neck, pulling me backwards, and I let out a yelp as I was forcibly dragged the rest of the distance to the gate. I struggled against the hand until a bit of cloak fell in my eyes and the familiar scent was an immediate comfort. Remus ran a hand over my head, glancing down at me, before stepping over my shivering form towards the Dementors.
"You have no business here," Remus stated, his voice calm, wand pointed at the forms coming closer to the gate. "Leave," he ordered again, but the Dementors kept coming. "Expecto Patronum!" A line of silvery stuff shot out of Remus's wand, towards the Dementors. They stopped their movements as the Patronus advanced towards them, shimmering. They disappeared back into the trees and Remus's Patronus faded. I dropped to my belly in relief, whimpering softly, my form shifting as I returned to my natural form.
"Oh, Padfoot," Remus breathed, kneeling down next to me, lifting my chin with his cool hand. He studied my face, looking for injuries, I suppose.
"I'm fine, Moony," I finally muttered, finding my voice again. "Helpless, but fine." He waved a hand in a dismissive gesture as I pushed myself up to my knees.
"You're not helpless, Sirius," Remus stated, rising to his feet and watching me closely as I followed suit.
"Yes, I am. Around them," I gestured in the direction the Dementors had retreated. "I'm helpless."
"Come inside, Padfoot," Remus sighed, placing a hand on my arm. That tiny touch sent a shock through my system, and I glanced over at Remus, but he didn't notice. "I have some chocolate that will help."
"It's always chocolate with you, Moony," I muttered, summoning a smile, trying to ignore Remus's hand.
"It tends to be a cure for all problems," he replied, returning the smile and leading me into the small cottage. The second I stepped across the threshold, I knew this was Remus's house. Books were piled on every available surface, including the small couch and matching chair. Remus must have noticed my gaze because he laughed softly.
"I was going to clean before you got here," he stated, gesturing at the books. I shook my head, chuckling, the cold of the Dementors beginning to leave.
"No, Moony, it's all right. It's...." I trailed off, not sure why the piles of books were causing such a strong reaction, because I could feel my throat tighten just looking at them. I shot a look at Remus who was studying me with curiosity, his head cocked slightly to the side. It was then that I realized what was behind my reaction. "It feels like home." Remus smiled at that, chuckling, before gesturing to the kitchen.
"Hot chocolate?" he asked, stepping into the smaller room. I nodded, following him. I sat down at the table, placing my chin on top of another pile of books, watching Remus pull out the kettle. He filled the kettle then started the stove fire with his wand. He adjusted the flame, watching the kettle closely for a second before nodding in satisfaction. Remus reached up, pulling one of the cabinets open. He moved various cans out the way before pulling out a small wrapped piece of chocolate. He unwrapped it and handed it to me. "Here," he said, "Until the chocolate's done."
I nodded, taking the chocolate and leaning back in the chair. I broke off a small piece and placed it in my mouth. My eyes fell shut as the tiniest bit of warmth began to spread, chasing away the Dementors' chill. I swallowed the bit of chocolate and opened my eyes to find Remus staring at me. Our eyes met, and my heart was pounding in my ears. The kettle suddenly whistled through the kitchen, causing us both to jump. I looked away first, clearing my throat as Remus rose to check the kettle.
"Have you heard?" I asked, glancing out the window above the sink. Remus stirred the chocolate before glancing over his shoulder.
"I heard," he muttered, pouring the mixture into two mugs and bringing them over to the table. "Cedric was one of my best students. Albus thought I would like to know." I nodded as he took his seat across from me, pushing one of the mugs in my direction. "Do you think it will be war again?" he asked, bringing the cup up to his lips. I nodded, cupping my hands around the mug, trying to absorb some of the warmth.
"Probably. But would we expect anything else?" I replied, laughing bitterly. "He'll come after Harry first, you know."
"I know," Remus sighed. "We won't let anything happen to him, Sirius." I nodded, glancing over at Remus, but he was staring down at his hands.
"I need your help, Remus," I stated softly, and he looked up, meeting my eyes again. "You know that the war is coming. You know that Voldemort will have the Dementors on his side." I took a deep breath, looking down and watching the chocolate swirl in the cup. "I can't protect Harry if I'm cowering in fear from them."
"We don't know that Voldemort will have the Dementors," Remus stated quietly.
"*I* know," I muttered. I sighed again, looking back up at Remus who was studying me with his head cocked again. "I need a Patronus," I said finally.
"Seventh year, Defense Against Dark Arts," he replied automatically, "You know how to conjure one already." Remus blinked, understanding suddenly. "But not since Azkaban," he said under his breath, low enough that I had to struggle to hear him. He smiled sadly at me. "Of course, Padfoot. You know I'll help."
"When do you think we can get started? I-I mean, would tonight be too soon?" I asked, relief flooding through me. Remus held up a hand.
"First, you need sleep," he stated, rising to his feet. I glanced over at the small clock by the door.
"It's only two in the afternoon, Moony," I protested. He responded by shaking his head and crossing his arms over his chest.
"And you look like you've been running for a week straight. Did you even stop to sleep?" he asked, a small grin tugging at his lips. I cocked my head, considering.
"Two days ago," I said finally with a nod. He laughed then, and I couldn't help but join in as he placed his hand on my arm, pulling me to my feet.
"Come along, Padfoot," Remus stated, leading me out of the kitchen. We turned right heading up the stairs.
"Moony?" I asked, trailing behind him, suddenly remembering the Dementors lurking in the woods. He stopped halfway up the stairs and turned. "The Dementors--"
"Can't get past the fence, neither physically nor magically," he said before heading back up the stairs. "It's a new spell Albus and I are working on. If it is successful here, we'll apply it to Hogwarts at the start of term this fall." I nodded, following him up to the small landing above us. We stepped into the narrow hallway leading off from the landing and towards the door at the end of the hall.
"Bath is there," Remus noted, pointing at a door on our left. "Towels, washcloths, and extra blankets are in the closet there," he said pointing at a door across from the bath. "This is the bedroom," he stated, pushing the door open to reveal a spacious bedroom. I laughed as I stepped across the threshold and took in the sight of even more piles of books. My smile died as I noticed the clothes stacked neatly on the dresser, and the parchment piled on the desk.
"This is your bedroom, Moony," I stated, softly, glancing around.
"This is the only bedroom, Padfoot," he corrected, leaning against the doorjamb.
"I'm not taking your bed," I stated, turning fully to him.
"And what do you suggest? That we share?" His eyes widened as if shocked that he'd actually suggested that.
I opened my mouth, fully wanting to reply _Well, would that be so bad?_, but what actually came out was, "I can take the couch." He looked away from me, closing his eyes and exhaling heavily.
"Stop being stubborn, and take the damn bed," he finally muttered, glancing back up at me. I watched him for a second as he studied me in return.
"Fine," I replied. He pushed away from the wall and stepped into the room.
"I'm not sure if my clothes will fit you," he stated softly. "If you want, I can go into town later and find some things that will fit."
"Moony?" He turned to me when I said his name, and I covered the distance between us, wrapping him in a hug. He stiffened slightly. "It's good to see you again, Remus," I whispered as he relaxed, one arm wrapping around my waist, the other around my shoulders. I clutched him tighter, burying my face in the curve of his neck, breathing in his scent, a smell that I remembered from the nights spent roaming the Forbidden Forest.
"I'm glad you're here, Sirius," Remus said, his voice low and hoarse, one hand smoothing my hair. We slid apart then, reluctantly, both of us stepping back. "Get some sleep. I'll wake you when dinner's ready." I stiffened at that, memories flooding to the surface of baby-sitting a six-month old Harry and Remus's attempt to make beef stew, which ended up tasting more like really bad clam chowder.
"You're not cooking, are you?" I asked. He merely rolled his eyes.
"No, that's what the house elves are here for," he replied, smiling slightly. I raised an eyebrow skeptically, not remembering any house elves when I'd been downstairs. "They've been out in the garden all day, finishing the weeding. They came with the cottage, so God only knows what Albus has taught them to cook."
"Well, that's a relief then," I stated, grinning at Remus. He merely shook his head.
"Sleep, Padfoot," he ordered with a smile.
"Yes, sir," I replied as he walked back into the hallway, pulling the door shut behind him. I sat on the bed, toeing my shoes off before leaning back on it. I briefly considered getting a shower, but sleep overcame me before that thought could come to fruition.
-------------------
Continued....
AUTHOR: Samantha [kali_neba@hotmail.com]
DISTRIBUTION: Azkaban's Lair. Anyone else, please ask first.
SPOILERS: All four books. Set the summer after GoF
RATING/CONTENT: eventual NC-17, PG for now, eventual Sirius/Remus, language, sex (all the good things in life ;)
SUMMARY: Sirius lies low at Lupin's and heals a little in the process. Sirius's POV
DISCLAIMER: Not mine. Sirius, Remus, and related characters belong to JK Rowling. No infringement intended.
**************************
// "Dementors are among the foulest creatures that walk this earth. They infest the darkest, filthiest places, they glory in decay and despair, they drain peace, hope, and happiness out of the air around them." -- Remus Lupin, _Prisoner of Azkaban_ //
**************************
Most wizards don't realize that magic has a distinctive scent that is exclusive to the user. Dumbledore's power smells faintly of lemons and lukewarm tea. Harry's smells like sweat and an undercurrent of blood. Most wizards just don't have the senses to understand that fact. I've spent enough time as a dog the past decade that it's second nature now, even when I'm not in my animagus form. It's a hell of a lot easier to track someone using their magic scent than their normal one.
Which is what I was doing here. Tracking, searching. Dumbledore hadn't exactly told me where Remus was, and I'd been sure not to ask when I had written to Remus after my escape. I would have been too tempted to stop and visit and stay far longer than I should, getting us both killed or shipped to Azkaban. I'd just found him again, and I'm certain I could deal with losing him. So, I contented myself with letters back and forth.
In the end, that decision not to endanger Remus left me searching the forests of southern Scotland where Dumbledore supposedly owned a cottage at some point. Arabella had been no help at all, merely giving me a sympathetic look and my body weight in food before pushing me out the door claiming that I was upsetting her cats. I suppose I could have just owled Remus and asked, but there's little adventure in that and, besides, I'd only been looking for a week. If I didn't find him by the time the moon rose tonight, I'd break down and find an owl to send.
Luckily, shortly after resolving to owl Remus, the wind shifted, and I'd caught the scent I'd been searching for this past week. Chocolate, wood smoke, and freshly turned earth. Remus. I barked happily, paws skidding in the mud as a changed direction and headed off of the dirt road I'd been traveling and down a small, nearly hidden bike path through the trees. I ran down the path at a full run, tongue lolling out of my mouth, breath coming in a pant.
I caught sight of the front gate covered in ivy and let out another bark, louder this time, to alert the resident of my arrival. Six feet away from the gate, and I felt it. An icy trail down my back, and suddenly, I felt like I was back in that dank cell with those things staring at me. I growled softly, head down, tail curling around my hind legs. I whimpered, my haunches rising as shadows slide between the trees, and three Dementors glided onto the path. They headed towards me, spreading out, blocking the path and any chance of escape. I was panicking. I could feel the despair welling inside of my mind, and any second, it was going to become impossible for me to hold my dog form.
Suddenly a hand clamped down on the scruff of my neck, pulling me backwards, and I let out a yelp as I was forcibly dragged the rest of the distance to the gate. I struggled against the hand until a bit of cloak fell in my eyes and the familiar scent was an immediate comfort. Remus ran a hand over my head, glancing down at me, before stepping over my shivering form towards the Dementors.
"You have no business here," Remus stated, his voice calm, wand pointed at the forms coming closer to the gate. "Leave," he ordered again, but the Dementors kept coming. "Expecto Patronum!" A line of silvery stuff shot out of Remus's wand, towards the Dementors. They stopped their movements as the Patronus advanced towards them, shimmering. They disappeared back into the trees and Remus's Patronus faded. I dropped to my belly in relief, whimpering softly, my form shifting as I returned to my natural form.
"Oh, Padfoot," Remus breathed, kneeling down next to me, lifting my chin with his cool hand. He studied my face, looking for injuries, I suppose.
"I'm fine, Moony," I finally muttered, finding my voice again. "Helpless, but fine." He waved a hand in a dismissive gesture as I pushed myself up to my knees.
"You're not helpless, Sirius," Remus stated, rising to his feet and watching me closely as I followed suit.
"Yes, I am. Around them," I gestured in the direction the Dementors had retreated. "I'm helpless."
"Come inside, Padfoot," Remus sighed, placing a hand on my arm. That tiny touch sent a shock through my system, and I glanced over at Remus, but he didn't notice. "I have some chocolate that will help."
"It's always chocolate with you, Moony," I muttered, summoning a smile, trying to ignore Remus's hand.
"It tends to be a cure for all problems," he replied, returning the smile and leading me into the small cottage. The second I stepped across the threshold, I knew this was Remus's house. Books were piled on every available surface, including the small couch and matching chair. Remus must have noticed my gaze because he laughed softly.
"I was going to clean before you got here," he stated, gesturing at the books. I shook my head, chuckling, the cold of the Dementors beginning to leave.
"No, Moony, it's all right. It's...." I trailed off, not sure why the piles of books were causing such a strong reaction, because I could feel my throat tighten just looking at them. I shot a look at Remus who was studying me with curiosity, his head cocked slightly to the side. It was then that I realized what was behind my reaction. "It feels like home." Remus smiled at that, chuckling, before gesturing to the kitchen.
"Hot chocolate?" he asked, stepping into the smaller room. I nodded, following him. I sat down at the table, placing my chin on top of another pile of books, watching Remus pull out the kettle. He filled the kettle then started the stove fire with his wand. He adjusted the flame, watching the kettle closely for a second before nodding in satisfaction. Remus reached up, pulling one of the cabinets open. He moved various cans out the way before pulling out a small wrapped piece of chocolate. He unwrapped it and handed it to me. "Here," he said, "Until the chocolate's done."
I nodded, taking the chocolate and leaning back in the chair. I broke off a small piece and placed it in my mouth. My eyes fell shut as the tiniest bit of warmth began to spread, chasing away the Dementors' chill. I swallowed the bit of chocolate and opened my eyes to find Remus staring at me. Our eyes met, and my heart was pounding in my ears. The kettle suddenly whistled through the kitchen, causing us both to jump. I looked away first, clearing my throat as Remus rose to check the kettle.
"Have you heard?" I asked, glancing out the window above the sink. Remus stirred the chocolate before glancing over his shoulder.
"I heard," he muttered, pouring the mixture into two mugs and bringing them over to the table. "Cedric was one of my best students. Albus thought I would like to know." I nodded as he took his seat across from me, pushing one of the mugs in my direction. "Do you think it will be war again?" he asked, bringing the cup up to his lips. I nodded, cupping my hands around the mug, trying to absorb some of the warmth.
"Probably. But would we expect anything else?" I replied, laughing bitterly. "He'll come after Harry first, you know."
"I know," Remus sighed. "We won't let anything happen to him, Sirius." I nodded, glancing over at Remus, but he was staring down at his hands.
"I need your help, Remus," I stated softly, and he looked up, meeting my eyes again. "You know that the war is coming. You know that Voldemort will have the Dementors on his side." I took a deep breath, looking down and watching the chocolate swirl in the cup. "I can't protect Harry if I'm cowering in fear from them."
"We don't know that Voldemort will have the Dementors," Remus stated quietly.
"*I* know," I muttered. I sighed again, looking back up at Remus who was studying me with his head cocked again. "I need a Patronus," I said finally.
"Seventh year, Defense Against Dark Arts," he replied automatically, "You know how to conjure one already." Remus blinked, understanding suddenly. "But not since Azkaban," he said under his breath, low enough that I had to struggle to hear him. He smiled sadly at me. "Of course, Padfoot. You know I'll help."
"When do you think we can get started? I-I mean, would tonight be too soon?" I asked, relief flooding through me. Remus held up a hand.
"First, you need sleep," he stated, rising to his feet. I glanced over at the small clock by the door.
"It's only two in the afternoon, Moony," I protested. He responded by shaking his head and crossing his arms over his chest.
"And you look like you've been running for a week straight. Did you even stop to sleep?" he asked, a small grin tugging at his lips. I cocked my head, considering.
"Two days ago," I said finally with a nod. He laughed then, and I couldn't help but join in as he placed his hand on my arm, pulling me to my feet.
"Come along, Padfoot," Remus stated, leading me out of the kitchen. We turned right heading up the stairs.
"Moony?" I asked, trailing behind him, suddenly remembering the Dementors lurking in the woods. He stopped halfway up the stairs and turned. "The Dementors--"
"Can't get past the fence, neither physically nor magically," he said before heading back up the stairs. "It's a new spell Albus and I are working on. If it is successful here, we'll apply it to Hogwarts at the start of term this fall." I nodded, following him up to the small landing above us. We stepped into the narrow hallway leading off from the landing and towards the door at the end of the hall.
"Bath is there," Remus noted, pointing at a door on our left. "Towels, washcloths, and extra blankets are in the closet there," he said pointing at a door across from the bath. "This is the bedroom," he stated, pushing the door open to reveal a spacious bedroom. I laughed as I stepped across the threshold and took in the sight of even more piles of books. My smile died as I noticed the clothes stacked neatly on the dresser, and the parchment piled on the desk.
"This is your bedroom, Moony," I stated, softly, glancing around.
"This is the only bedroom, Padfoot," he corrected, leaning against the doorjamb.
"I'm not taking your bed," I stated, turning fully to him.
"And what do you suggest? That we share?" His eyes widened as if shocked that he'd actually suggested that.
I opened my mouth, fully wanting to reply _Well, would that be so bad?_, but what actually came out was, "I can take the couch." He looked away from me, closing his eyes and exhaling heavily.
"Stop being stubborn, and take the damn bed," he finally muttered, glancing back up at me. I watched him for a second as he studied me in return.
"Fine," I replied. He pushed away from the wall and stepped into the room.
"I'm not sure if my clothes will fit you," he stated softly. "If you want, I can go into town later and find some things that will fit."
"Moony?" He turned to me when I said his name, and I covered the distance between us, wrapping him in a hug. He stiffened slightly. "It's good to see you again, Remus," I whispered as he relaxed, one arm wrapping around my waist, the other around my shoulders. I clutched him tighter, burying my face in the curve of his neck, breathing in his scent, a smell that I remembered from the nights spent roaming the Forbidden Forest.
"I'm glad you're here, Sirius," Remus said, his voice low and hoarse, one hand smoothing my hair. We slid apart then, reluctantly, both of us stepping back. "Get some sleep. I'll wake you when dinner's ready." I stiffened at that, memories flooding to the surface of baby-sitting a six-month old Harry and Remus's attempt to make beef stew, which ended up tasting more like really bad clam chowder.
"You're not cooking, are you?" I asked. He merely rolled his eyes.
"No, that's what the house elves are here for," he replied, smiling slightly. I raised an eyebrow skeptically, not remembering any house elves when I'd been downstairs. "They've been out in the garden all day, finishing the weeding. They came with the cottage, so God only knows what Albus has taught them to cook."
"Well, that's a relief then," I stated, grinning at Remus. He merely shook his head.
"Sleep, Padfoot," he ordered with a smile.
"Yes, sir," I replied as he walked back into the hallway, pulling the door shut behind him. I sat on the bed, toeing my shoes off before leaning back on it. I briefly considered getting a shower, but sleep overcame me before that thought could come to fruition.
-------------------
Continued....
