'A' For Effort

(Small riff on pain -in the- arse Patrick, a character from Another Bit. Jumanji is owned by Sony. I don't know about Howdy Doody. Bonny, Matt, and Patrick are original characters.)

He hadn't walked in on them.

Well, he hadn't. Bonny was simply reaching for something across the kichen island, and Van Pelt had accidentally run into her from behind..

..repeatedly.

Nothing going on there.

Patrick was adept at stepping in it. Sometimes he stepped in it before there was something to step in. Other times, he'd open his mouth, make something to step in.. then step in it. He'd always been that way, and old habits die hard.

He stared into the bathroom mirror, and pursed his lips at his shock of red hair, large blue eyes, and freckles..don't forget the freckles. He sneered at his reflection, and growled "Get moving, Sonny Jim!"

Nup.. Howdy Doody never struck fear into the heart of any man. He would never be worthy of the hunter. Van Pelt could lock eyes with a woman, and hold her gaze, all the while surveying, and enjoying every curve of her body.

Pats eyes were watering just a little bit. "Why does he have to be so damn cool?" he whispered , slumping his shoulders.

Not worthy...

The phone rang.

"Yes. Yes Sir, I'm on it."

He raised head, wiping his nose on the back of his hand, and gave himself a thumbs up in the mirror.

Patrick would never be much of a ruthless henchman, but it wasn't for lack of trying.