"Why don't you except the fact he is not returning!" As soon as she said it, she regreted it because Olivia was now turning around. She wish she could hit the rewind button and delete the words. The words she knew that would hurt Olivia the most.

"What did you just fucking say?" Olivia walked towards her now with the prowl like a lioness after her kill. Amanda's mouth went dry and when she went to speak nothing came out.

"You have some nerve talking about something you have no idea about! I have spent too much time loving him, fighting for him and protecting him for me to just drop it! So why don't you just go back to fucking Atlanta where you actually matter."

Amanda had felt each and every word pierce her and all she could do was pick up her coat and try to leave without showing her tears. Maybe Olivia was right, maybe she should go back to Atlanta.

No, she couldn't because the person who made her leave was there. The man who backed her into a corner and was going to force her to have sex with him. Her former captain. Everywhere she turned she felt like she was not welcome.

She walked out the precinct vacant, lost and unsure. This was terrifying to her, the city that was supposed to change everything for the good, changed everything for the exact opposite. As soon as the soles of her shoes hit the pavement, the tears came. Why did she have to ruin everything she touches.

"No Amanda, stop you did not ruin Atlanta. He did, stop blaming yourself." Her thoughts were taking over her emotions and the tears stopped. Time to figure out if she was going to return to the 1-6 or just relocate and change her name.

~8~

Amanda sat on her couch listening to the rain ,curled up in her sweats thinking back at the events from earlier when there was a knock at the door. Opening up the door there was a much expected surprise. She scanned Olivia top to bottom , noting the fact she was soaked from the rain and the hair matted to her face.

"Olivia, why are you..."

Olivia didn't let her finish the sentence as she welcomed herself into the small apartment .Amanda was feeling the dryness in her mouth again because she simply was confused. Olivia leaned against the far wall and her head was low, unlike her typical demeanor. This was her now or never chance.

"You loved him, didn't you? This is why the famous Olivia Benson has been the biggest bitch in the world." Olivia looked up , her blood shot eyes stared Amanda down. "Shit, Olivia, I didn't mean that last part."

"Yes you did, it's true though. To answer your question that you put so bluntly, yes I do or did love him." Her head dropped back down and shifted her weight.

" Olivia, it seems to me like he is a great man, he was a great cop but a terrible friend." Amanda walked up to her caustiously and lifted the necklace up in her hand. Grazing the madalion with her thumb."Has he spoken to you other the that little note?"

She shock her head and started to cry. Her body was shacking all over and Amanda couldnt take it wrapped her arms aroud her tight stood there like she was protecting her from the world. Slowly she had guided the broken detective to the couch to be mor comfortable without breaking her grip.

As time went by Olivia feel asleep in Amanda's arms. Slowly she got up and wrapped her in a blanket and brushed the hair out of her face. Something has changed between them, for the better would have to wait in the morning. Amanda got up and went into her own bed, wondering what would come of this night.

Amanda woke up with a groan and the regret of staying up as late as she did. She got up and made her way to the living room to find Olivia gone. The blanket that was once wrapped around her was folded neatly on the bed and a note laid on top.

~8~

" Amanda, Sorry about last night. It won't happen again and thank you for everything. Can you not tell anyone about this? -Olivia "

Well that wasn't at all a surprise. She folded the letter up and tossed it in the trash as her phone went off. One thing she was hopping it wasnt was.

"Briefing in thirty minutes. Bye." Cragen's voice was cold and she could tell he still hated her. He wasn't the only one.

She feels her eyes on her during the briefing and al she wants is for her to look away. It's hard to concentrate this way and Amanda can't breathe. She stands up, chalking it up to a bad breakfast she rushes to the cribs. As soon as she is up there she grasps her chest to breath. This isnt normal, why does Olivia have such a grip on her.

"Do you mind explaining to me why you just ran out of a briefing?" Amanda looks up at her with fear.

"When did you get up here?"

"What do you think im gonna do, hit you?"

"Yeah."

Olivia chuckles lightly and runs her hands though her hair and walks towards the younger detective.

"I really have become a hard ass huh?" Amanda bites her lip, unable to answer, unknowing how Olivia was before hand.

"Meet me at my place, 8 o'clock."

With that Olivia left Amanda in the dead silent squad room. Olivia seemed to calm all of a sudden. Amanda was a bit baffled by the propation.

"Maybe she will murder me quick." She chuckled at her own though and walked back into the squad room.

~8~

The only thing she could hear was her heart beat and the click of her own heels as she walked to apartment 4-E . What could Olivia possibly say to her , the overthinking and over analyzing was driving her mad. When she reached the door her knock was sporadic but it took all of thirty seconds for Olivia to open it.

The smell of food being cooked filled Amanda's nose and her eyes gazed on the detective that looked like sex. She was dressed like any person on the street though, if those people had jeans that hugged hips like that or a shirt that showed off the best features.

"Hey! You're late." Olivia voice snapped Amanda out of her thinking process and brought her back to the situation at hand.

"I know, Im sorry. I got lost on the way here. Wow, nice set up you got going on here." She walked in like she had the confidence, the confidence she had before New York, before Atlanta. The same confidence she had been faking all along.

"Thanks, wine?" Olivia went into her kitchen and searched in her cabinets for glasses without an answer from Amanda.

"Olivia." Amanda didnt receive an answer right away as Olivia searched in each cabinet slowly, not turning around.

"Olivia."

"I know those glasses are here somewhere."

"Detective!" That did the trick, Olivia turned around and leaned against the counter, face flushed.

"This isnt who I am Amanda. For three months now I have had to adapt. Adapt the fact that some I cared for, Some one I love, scratch that, someone I loved had left me. Yeah, maybe he did do what was best for him. What about me huh? Thirteen years and for what, this fucking necklace!" Olivia tugged hard on the chain around her neck hard, tears not escaping her eyes.

"Man after man, he has chased off. Like a cat and mouse game he like to play. Lets not mention the fact If I had eyes for someone close to us. He flipped every time! What kind of shit is that? Why would a married man do that to someone?"

Amanda stood there in silence as she let Olivia rant on. She did not kow who Elliot was but she had the strange urge to kick his ass. The shell of a once great detective was standing there, fighting back tears and yelling to a women he barley knows about a man she loved.

"Well, say something!"

" What are you cooking." Amanda walked in the kitchen towards Olivia, slowly and with ease. Not sure how she would act to this approach in her state of mind. Standing right in front of Olivia she reaches out and rubs her arm slowly, then turning her attention to the stove.

"It smells good" Without another word said she was being spun around and lips crashed onto hers. It was nothing she had ever experienced; it was rough, rushed and aggressive. As quickly as it began, it ended. Olivia backed away nearly two feet, and her stance returned.

"Stir that food will ya, its going to burn." Amanda blinked a couple times to get back the reality of it all and started to stir. Silence swept over them for another five minutes as Amanda helped with the cooking. In attempt to salvage what she was trying to achieve Olivia got behind Amanda and trailed her hand down her arm. Amanda tenses under her touch, not knowing how to react to all this affection from someone that seemed to hate her.

"Relax." She pushes the blonde's hair aside and places her lips to her neck. That didn't help her relax one bit. As Olivia sucked and nibbled her pale skin, Amanda's body was on fire, That low, dull fire in between legs growing by the second.

"Fuck Olivia, do more, Im about to die here…" With a laugh Olivia turned off the burner and ran her hands down Amandas toned stomach.

"Getting antsy are we?" He muscles twitched and contracted under her touch, Olivia's hand getting close to the seam or her jeans. Licking her lips subconsciously, Amanda's eye's closed for a moment, caught in what was to be sure bliss. That was until Olivia stepped away.

"What the hell…" Amanda turned around to see Olivia with a smirk on her face.

"Go into the room, now." Without saying a word Amanda quickly found what was to be the room where Olivia laid in bed every other night. As soon as Amanda was out of sight, Olivia leaned against the counter to catch her breath. She had to move on, from what was holding her back, so with shaky hands she removed his medallion from her neck. He was no longer holding her back from the life she needed to live.

Amanda sat on the bed awkwardly waiting when Olivia walked in. As she walked across her room her shirt ended up on the floor.

"Oh shit…" Amanda shifted on the bed, not knowing really what to do. She had never been with someone so confident that she felt like the submissive one. Olivia stood in front of her now , her eyes burning dark she leans forward and captures Amanda's lips into hers. It started slow but slowly built up into an aggressive control over the younger detective. She pushed her to lay flat on the mattress and broke from the heated kiss to move to her neck.

"How do you like it huh? Do you like it rough and dirty or sweet and sensual?" Olivia's voice dripped of sex as she grinded against Amanda. Only thing Amanda's brain was allowing was muffled moan to escape her wet parted lips. Olivia pulled apart from the mess she was creating with a proud smirk. She unbuttoned her jeans slowly, watching Amanda lick her lips as she slowly pulled her jeans off to reveal the lack of underwear she was drops to her knees in front of Amanda and yanks on her pants hard, sending them off her body.

"Oh fuck Liv!" With the shorten term of her name, Olivia look up for a brief moment, not knowing how to process it. Amanda, completely lost in her lust just gave her a tiny smile and Olivia forgot that it even mattered.

In a blink of an eye both parties were naked but Olivia was standing on her knees in front of Amanda's spread legs. Seeing that she was more then ready for what she was about to receive. Leaning forward Olivia drags her fingers through the wet folds.

"God Manda, you are so hot for me huh? What was it? Me yelling at you makes you cream your panties don't it?" With each she becomes more wet then before , wiggling under her touch. Without much warning Olivia shoves two fingers in her wet heat, causing the blonde to scream out. Olivia was enjoying watching her face , the pleasure written all over it. Amanda couldn't take the stand still any longer, bucking her hips up to gain friction as the brunette smirked

Not to tease her anymore she started pumping her fingers fast and hard. The fact she can tell the blondes senses were in over drive was making her even more aroused. She was ot being gentle as she thrusted into her.

"So god damn tight." Olivia was starting to lose control of herself as she sunk her teeth into the pale skin of Amanda's neck, causing a loud cry. Twisting her fingers and hitting each spot was making her feel in power but the noises Amanda was making was cause herself to titter that edge.

"Im…fuck..Liv, please!" Olivia propped herself up slightly to look at Amanda, wanting to watch her make a women scream her name for the first time. Her face was covered in a light sweat , lips swollen, eyes closed tight was enough to make a porn star jealous.

"Open your eyes." It was a fast demand that she obliged, Looking into the almost black eyes that was peering down at her. With a swipe of her thumb across her bundle of nerves sent her over the edge. She screamed out Olivia's name, arching her back, vision turning white. Nearly blacking out from the pure rush, she falls back on the bed, panting, trapping Olivia's fingers in her.

Chuckling to herself she slowly removes her fingers from the blonde underneath her. Slowly she sucks on her fingers, savoring the taste as Amanda slowly came back to reality.

"Liv?"

"Hmm?"

"Uh, what do I taste like?" Not missing a beat Olivia leaned down and kissed her deep and with much passion as she could.

"You taste fucking amazing."

AN: Yes I wrote a non EO. Yes, there is life outside EO AHAHA. Can't deny the hotness that is Rolivia. Big ups to Kez ( Viperraps) for pushing me to finish this even though I suck.