A/N: I'm trying to work on more Scarlet Widow fic. Here's an attempt – very rough. This is more just to get me back into the swing of writing. R/R appreciated as always, but this is really just a one shot I couldn't get out of my head.
Reminisce
Five of the survivors of Thanos decide to share stories of their loved ones. Natasha Romanoff, facing the end of the world, reveals something she never thought she'd speak of.
"Gods, I miss Jane so much," Thor rumbled, putting the bottle of moonshine down on the bar top. Steve Rogers placed his hand on Thor's shoulder in comfort. Five of the survivors of Thanos were in the Avengers Base, built after the battle of Sokovia, around the bar Tony Stark kept fully stocked. It only seemed fitting, since they did not know where Iron Man was. Rhodey swirled his scotch in his glass. "Will she be at Stark and Pepper's wedding?" he asked. The five had come to a silent agreement that the wedding they'd all been expecting would still happen… at some point. Thor nodded with a sad smile. "Yes, of course. She and her friend Darcy like Pepper very much."
"I've never met her," Bruce announced from his stool, putting down his water, "I'm excited to see who can keep up with you."
"I'm sure you'll find her worthy, mighty Banner," Thor sighed. The Asgardian swung his head over to the silent woman at the other end of the bar. "What of you, Romanoff? When did this hulking fellow catch your fancy?" Natasha Romanoff's eyes flicked up, squinted, a scowl on her lips as she hugged her bottle of vodka closer to her.
"I'm actually curious," Steve chuckled. Bruce didn't voice it, but Rhodey, who was sitting closest to him, could tell the doctor wanted to know. "It's basically the end of the world anyway, Nat. You might as well." The redhead's face had gone blank again, staring back into the liquid before her. The room went silent for a long moment, each feeling sorrow start to creep back into the shadows the longer the quiet stretched on.
"Well…" Thor mumbled, clearing his throat, "Rhodes, would you like to-"
"I love her." Four heads turned towards the assassin, each jaw at varying amounts of open.
"What?" Bruce questioned.
"I love her," Natasha repeated, looking up from her bottle, "Wanda Maximoff. I love her." A smile spread across her lips. "It started the night after the battle of Sokovia."
There was a knock at her bedroom door.
"F.R.I.D.A.Y. tell them to go away," she growled.
"I did, Ms. Romanoff," the A.I. replied, "She did not listen."
The knock came again. "Natasha, please… I would like to speak to you," came the newest member of their team, Wanda Maximoff.
"Fine. Come in," she said. The door opened slowly, and in crept the witch, timid and shy after the battle. There was a quiet smile on the brunette's lips, and she could not help but return it."Wanda, I am so sorry, again, about your brother… Did Clint tell you? He named his baby after him." Grief clouded the witch's green eyes as she sat, without permission, on the edge of the bed.
"Yes. Steve showed me a video Clint sent him. It was very kind of the archer. But that is not what I wanted to talk to you about. It is about before. It is about what I saw in your head." Natasha felt a pang of fury and terror shoot through her at the reminder, and looked away from those all too round eyes. "Natasha, I was so naïve to make you relive those horrors," Wanda said, when she would not quite look at her, "I wanted to truly apologize for my actions. I was doing as Ultron told Pietro and I, but it was still my choice to follow him."
"I understand," Natasha eyes flicked away from the wall. They were still sitting on opposite sides of her bed, and Wanda scooted just a bit closer. "It's ok, Maximoff. I forgive you." They locked eyes, the moon lighting the room soft silver.
"In that moment… I could feel something changing. Giving way inside me." Natasha's eyes flicked over to Bruce, sorrow matching his. "I wanted to kiss her right then and there."
"And did you?" Steve asked.
"I don't kiss and tell, Rogers," she chuckled with a wink.
"Continue, Romanoff," Thor requested, "I did not consider you to love women. It is quite intriguing."
"Bruce… Are you ok?" she asked him instead, ignoring her sexuality being 'intiguing'.
The doctor cleared his throat and looked down at his water. "Yes. A lot has changed since Thor and I left. Go on."
"I am sorry about Bruce Banner," Wanda continued, moving another bit closer to her. She forced a laugh.
"Thanks, Wanda. It's… It's ok. He must have something to figure out. Something none of us can understand."
"He is very foolish, though, for leaving you. I have seen inside your mind, Natasha. You are something powerful. Something… of a miracle."
"Like you?" she teased, finding her own body moving closer, a smirk on her lips.
"No," Wanda whispered, "You understand yourself. Part of you thinks you are a monster, but most of you knows you are not. I understand Bruce, too. We are alike in some sense. We are both monsters with very little understanding of ourselves." The witch looked away from Natasha, gazing down at her own hands, rolling red between her fingers. When Natasha caught Wanda's eyes again, she saw red; then the witch blinked and green returned, hands still of magic. Natasha slipped her fingers through those lithe ones in a gesture of comfort. Wanda clutched back in return, the rush of blood to her cheeks at the movement shocking her.
"You are not a monster, Wanda," she managed despite the unruly blush, "You're mourning right now. That's not monstrous. That's human."
"How come we don't get to meet this delightful side of yourself?" Rhodey chuckled.
"Wanda asked that, too," Natasha returned.
Steve leaned towards the assassin and laughed as well, exclaiming, "Oh, look at that, Thor! We've made her blush!"
"Shut up, Rogers," she growled, though the four men recognized the lack of venom in her voice. She turned back towards Bruce. "Are you sure you're ok, Bruce?"
"Nat. I just want you to be happy. And… I like this story. Everything sucks right now. I like seeing you smile… and blush."
She stuck out her tongue at that.
"Thank you, Natasha, for being so kind. You should reveal this side of yourself to your teammates more often." The moon struck Wanda's eyes, lighting a green fire there; it danced in her teeth, tangled its fingers through her long brown hair.
"Fuck…" Natasha breathed, finding herself way too close to the witch. Confusion crowded the green eyes she stared into as she dropped those clutching hands.
"What? Natasha, have I done something wrong?"
"N-no," she stammered, feeling, for once in her life, speechless, "But… If you don't leave right now, I might do something very, very stupid."
"Oh? And what would that be, Natasha?"
"You look…" Her hand touched Wanda's cheek, slid up and into those brown locks, and closed gently. "You look so fucking beautiful in this light."
"Light? Natasha, it is very dark in here," Wanda teased. A red glow illuminated the room and her eyes. "There. Do you still think I am beautiful?"
Her heart thumped, so loud she thought the rest of her teammates could hear. "Yes," she whispered, pulling Wanda in.
"So did you bestow a kiss upon this Wanda?" Thor asked.
Natasha raised her eyebrow to the demigod, "I did."
"And what happened after that? Because she and Vis-" Steve started, before Bruce cut him off with, "She chose Vision over you?!"
"What Tony said, about the avengers breaking up… she was on Steve's side," Natasha murmured, nodding towards the soldier, who looked down at the table, "I was on Tony's… We didn't discuss what we were. We were very quiet about it. We had... a little falling out some time before the airport. I could tell she was taking some of that out on me then. She is very powerful with her magic, but she packs a hell of a punch, too… Packed… a hell of a punch." She took a long swig from the bottle, paused, studied it, and finished the remaining liquor. She let the bottle slip through her fingers, the crack a brilliant sound, the shards a brilliant explosion. The four men caught her scowl at the mess, flinching to avoid the glass.
"I love her," she repeated, "When she got mad at me for siding with Stark, I loved her. When she accidently dredged up another memory during training, I loved her. When she slammed me into the side of a plane because Clint wasn't hitting me hard enough, I loved her. When I had to watch her fall in love with Vision, I. Loved. Her. But I never had the chance to tell her how I really, truly felt about her," she slid out of her seat and reached down, cupping glass in her palm, "And now she's nothing but dust." She let the fragments drop through her fingers, watching Wanda fade away all over again.
Her chest heaved as Bruce stood up and crossed to her, wordlessly wrapping his arms around her in a tight hug. Startled, she hugged back. Steve reached up and brushed tears she didn't know were falling down her cheeks.
"Thank you for sharing, Romanoff," Thor bellowed, "We will get this Wanda Maximoff back. I would like to meet the woman who has reduced you to blushing."
"Thank you," she sighed as Bruce let go, keeping a hand on her shoulder. She met each of the men's eyes with a soft smile. "For letting me talk about her. Not even Clint knows… or knew… It feels good to talk about her."
When Natasha's lips closed over Wanda's, her heart thumped into her throat, her fingers tightened in that soft brown hair, pulled her even closer. Wanda's tongue flicked at her lips for permission. She opened her mouth, enough to nip at the witch's lower lip, before deepening the kiss. The red glow grew brighter, and Natasha found herself reclined against the mattress, the witch straddling her hips. Then the red died down as Wanda's hands fascinated herself in her ginger curls, tugging with the same desperation Natasha found in her own.
When they broke apart, she was breathless, staring up into those green eyes.
"I do not think that was so stupid at all, Natasha," Wanda murmured, stroking a finger across her face.
"I…"
"Speechless? It is very endearing on you."
"Come here. I need to do that again."
"Ms. Natasha, I can kiss you every morning. If you will allow it."
"Wanda, I am very, very bad at… being soft, being loving. Let's start with now. And see where it goes."
"Then please tell me what you want right now, Natasha, so I can give it to you," the brunette murmured, rolling her hips forward. Natasha sucked in a breath at the movement, letting her hands slide to close over Wanda's.
"Wanda… If you keep rocking those hips of yours, I won't be able to control myself. And I hate losing control." The witch pinned her hands over her head, leaning down with a cheeky grin,
"Ok," Red glowed one last time, Wanda's magic flipping them so Natasha rested over the witch instead, "Then you can be in control." Wanda leaned up to capture another kiss before Natasha could answer; She could see their whole future behind her eyelids. She hoped, one day, she would be brave enough to see that future through.
"If you tell anyone when we save the world…" Natasha, smiling, finished the story, "I will kick all of your asses. Got it?" She met each of their eyes again; they each saw that she meant it. Then, with a soft nod, she turned from the bar, back towards them. "Sorry about the mess, Rhodey."
"It's no trouble, Nat," he murmured softly, "I'll take care of it, if you want to take some space."
"Yeah," she sighed, lifting a shoulder, "Night, everyone."
"See you in the morning, Natasha," Steve called, as the others chorused their goodnights back. Her feet seemed to drag the entire walk to the elevator down the hall, the other four voices dying down behind her.
"What floor would you like, Ms. Romanoff?" F.R.I.D.A.Y.'s voice sounding once inside. The A.I., due to the fact it wasn't living, remained very much in tact in the base, and, because of its advance intelligence due to Tony, tried its hardest to provide what comforts it could.
"Wanda Maximoff's floor, please," the assassin replied, sagging against the back wall as the doors slid closed.
"I'm sorry, Ms. Maximoff's floor requires a password. Would you like to enter it?"
The A.I. lit up a paneling of the elevator with a keyboard. The redhead chewed at her lip as she entered in 'Sokovia', 'Pietro', 'Avengers', and even 'Sea Salt Caramel', the witch's favorite treat of the United States. All lit up red, with an 'Incorrect Password' warning.
"Dammit, F.R.I.D.A.Y! Can't you just let me up there!"
"I'm sorry, Ms. Romanoff. Would you like to continue trying?" the A.I. returned.
"This is so goddamned stupid, override the damn thing already!" she growled, fingers typing in 'Stupid' before her brain could stop them. The panel lit up green, flashing 'Password Accepted' across its face before disappearing. The elevator rumbled to life and shot upwards. Her heart hummed along with it, her fingers pressed to her lips as tears beaded in her eyes, as she recalled the first kiss for the second time that evening.
The elevator came to a seamless stop, doors sliding open; she stepped onto the witch's floor. It was disheveled, likely from her hasty escape after the battle at the airport, but her essence still hung thick in the air, almost hypnotic as she turned instinctively towards the hallway that led to Wanda's bedroom, where she paused in the doorway, mouth dry, tears now freely trickling down the planes of her cheeks.
The memory of their "little fall out" flooded back as she hung back at the threshold.
"Wanda, please, look at me," Natasha cooed softly from the doorway. The witch's shoulders shook as sobs racked her body. It was four a.m., and the base was, for once, quiet, as Earth's mightiest heroes got much needed sleep. The assassin had roused from a dreamless sleep, a tight feeling in her chest something was wrong. She had taken the elevator, no password needed then, up to Wanda's floor, and followed the sounds of cries down the hall. "Wanda, honey, please." She knelt on the mattress and pulled the young woman to her, wrapping her in a tight hug. "Tell me what's wrong."
"I had a dream," the brunette gasped, throat tight, "Where Pietro was alive."
"That's a good thing, isn't it?" she questioned.
"It was so real, Natasha. When I woke and he wasn't beside me…" The witch leaned back, furiously swiping at her tear-stained face. "I am sorry. It was stupid. You did not have to come up to check on me."
"Hey, look at me," she murmured, hooking a finger under Wanda's chin, making her meet her gaze, "It wasn't stupid. And even if it was, you already know how I feel about stupid things."
That garnered a small smile from the witch, who pressed a soft kiss on her lips, hands taking hers. "I love you," Wanda breathed across the kiss. Natasha stiffened at the words; pulling back, she saw hope and adoration shining in those green eyes. When she remained silent, she saw it fade to hurt and anger.
"Wanda, I-"
"No. It was foolish of me to say that so soon. I am sorry, Natasha."
"Wanda.."
"You can go now. I would like to be alone." The witch untangled the embrace entirely, and rose, crossing to the window, stance dismissive.
'But I love you, too,' Natasha thought, desperately, entirely, tongue unable to shape the words. Instead, she said, stammering, "Let me know if you need anything, Wanda… Even if you think it's stupid." But the witch did not respond, and she turned, heart sinking, away.
Natasha stepped into the room, Wanda's aura strongest here, and crossed to the window, much like the witch had that night. The next day, and every day after that, there had been a frost from the witch, colder than the sweat Natasha woke to after nightmares. And yet, she could never voice those words. And then the battle at the airport happened and she had never gotten the chance again. She thought, maybe, during the battle with Thanos's army, when the witch had saved her, she'd tell her. Of course, again, she didn't get her chance.
"We will find a way to bring you back," she murmured to the empty room, breath fogging the glass, "And when we do, I promise to tell you. To show you. To prove to you that we can have the future I saw for us. I'd do anything to have you back." Silence greeted her words, the starless sky vast and endless beyond her. "Oh, Wanda, my little witch. I love you."
