Red Reflections - Simmons

By Ptath

Beta-ed by Thalia

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Rating: PG / K+ for language

These are the internal mullings of one Pfc. Dick Simmons. After watching episode 93 of "Red vs. Blue," my mind turned to Simmons and how he tried to comfort Grif after Sarge told him that his sister had been murdered by the Blues. This was the result.


Sarge, what's happened to you? Ever since we buried you … you've changed, sir. For the worse. I know you hate Grif. I know you think he's a stupid, lazy, good-for-nothing, overweight pig … but I've always known there's something more. Something deeper that's driving this hate. You don't always seem to hate him, and when he's truly in danger, like when he got run over by Sheila, you save his life.

What's happened? What you said … the way you said it … how could you just tell him his sister was dead and act so … gleeful?

That's not you. It can't be.

God, Sarge. Even Donut thinks you were wrong. He's so impressionable … he practically thinks you can walk on water. And he told you that you should be more considerate.

You can't do this, Sarge, you can't. I've looked up to you, needed you, ever since you rescued me on Sidewinder. When we were sent to Blood Gulch, I thought I would finally get the chance to make a difference. But when we arrived, you changed.

You started lashing out at Grif almost immediately. What did he do? Yeah, maybe he was a bit overweight and lazy. But when we first established Red Base, he tried. He tried, sir.

I'd heard his reputation, that he was nothing more than a trouble-maker. I didn't think that when I met him. Whatever his past units were like, I think he really wanted to start fresh in Blood Gulch.

You pushed him away, sir. Maybe he should have tried harder. Maybe I should have come in on his side instead of just agreeing with everything you said.

But how could I do anything else? You save my life, Sarge. And ever since we arrived in Blood Gulch, it's like your grasp on reality has begun to slip. You're lucid most of the time. Or at least … you were. You've … you've been slipping more often since we came back.

It's when you've slipped that I'm the most afraid. I'm the only one who knew you before Blood Gulch. Grif and Donut don't realize what a great man you are.

And that's why I have to protect them. I know how to derail you, how to distract Grif when all he wants to do is hit you.

But you won't listen as much, lately.

That's why what you said to Grif is so frightening. You wouldn't have done that last year. Even then, you would have tried to cushion the news a little. Or at least given him some time alone.

Sarge, all I can do is pray that … that you'll come back, that you'll return to normal soon.

You have to …


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