This image of Kurt has been haunting me for like a week now. I just had to write it.
This really wasn't the bombshell Blaine was expecting Kurt to drop when he'd said he had something to tell Blaine.
"You're a what?" Blaine asked, feeling his forehead furrow into deep ruts. "You can't be."
"I assure you, Blaine, I'm half-vampire," Kurt said. He squeezed Blaine's hand one last time before releasing it and sinking back into his end of the couch. "I won't hold it against you if you want to run screaming from the apartment."
"But you almost pass out in terror every time you have to get your blood drawn at the doctor's," Blaine said, not leaving his seat. "And you just ate garlic bread with me at that Italian place last night."
"Are those really your biggest concerns right now, B?" Kurt asked, giving Blaine a judgmental look. "I just told you I sometimes need to drink blood to survive, and you're worried about my eating habits?"
"Drinking blood to survive is kind of the whole mythos behind vampirism, Kurt," Blaine said. "So forgive me if that's not the weirdest thing you've admitted tonight."
"I should've expected this," Kurt muttered, so quiet Blaine almost couldn't hear him. "I'm dating the guy who reads Star Wars fanfiction as bedtime stories, why didn't I see this coming?"
Blaine ignored Kurt's jab at his preferred reading material. "But seriously, shouldn't that garlic bread have killed you?"
"I'm only half-vamp, honey. It sometimes gives me indigestion, but I can handle a little garlic," Kurt said. "And the fear of needles knows no species, to address your other concern."
"Good to know," Blaine said, fascinated. "Anything else I need to know? Should I expect to see bats flying around our apartment more often?"
"Oh my God, I hope not," Kurt said, shuddering. "You'll hear me shrieking in Ohio if bats end up infesting the place."
"See, this is why it's hard for me to believe you're even part vampire, babe," Blaine said. He reached out and squeezed Kurt's hand comfortingly. "Aren't bats your brethren or something?"
"Vermin are not my brethren, thank you very much," Kurt said acerbically. "And before you ask, no, I also don't sparkle. I'm just a little paler, a little stronger, and a little quicker than normal humans. If I was actually coordinated, I might have been a decent track star."
"But you hate running."
"Okay, if I was actually coordinated and didn't think running was the most pointless form of exercise," Kurt allowed. There was a moment of silence before he continued quietly, "So you're really okay with this?"
"What, with my unique, amazing fiance being a little more unique and amazing than I'd previously known? Of course," Blaine said, scooting in and pressing a kiss to Kurt's cheek. "I love you, Kurt. It'd take a lot more than finding out you're part creature of the night to change that."
"I am so lucky to have you," Kurt said. He gave Blaine a kiss that started gentle but quickly intensified, neither of them wanting to break free until they absolutely had to breathe. "Hey, would you mind if I grabbed a drink?" Kurt asked when he'd caught his breath. "It's been a couple weeks since my last fix, and I'm really feeling drained."
"Do you have blood somewhere in here?" Blaine asked. He looked around the living room, thinking Kurt might have been hiding his stash in plain sight.
"I've been keeping it in a cooler in Rachel's old room, but now that you know, I might just leave it in the fridge, if that's okay," Kurt said tentatively.
"Oh no, that's totally fine, sweetheart!" Blaine said. "I'll be able to tell it's not tomato juice, though, right?"
"I'll show you what the pouches look like," Kurt said, getting up. He quickly retrieved his stash from its hiding place, and pulled out a juice box-looking carton for Blaine to see. "They'll be in these unmarked white containers, totally unobtrusive."
"How do you drink out of that?" Blaine asked. "There's not a straw."
Kurt quirked an eyebrow. "Fangs, Blaine. I use my fangs."
"Wait, you have those?"
"Of course I do, B. See?" Kurt held his mouth open and got a look of concentration on his face, and sure enough, two small fangs elongated out of his normal incisors. "They're not very big, because I'm only half vamp, but they do the job." He bit into his blood box and started sucking, letting out a sigh of contentment after a moment.
Blaine couldn't hold back his coo. "You're so adorable."
"Blaine. I am literally drinking blood right now."
"But your fangs are so tiny and you've got the vampire equivalent of a juice box and I just kind of want to cuddle you right now." Blaine could tell he was sporting a broad, goofy grin, but he just couldn't help himself.
"...I don't even know what to say to that." Kurt looked like he was afraid for Blaine's sanity.
"Just come here and snuggle with me while we watch Eclipse for the billionth time," Blaine said, patting the couch invitingly. "You know you want to."
"This really isn't how I thought tonight would go," Kurt said, plopping down next to Blaine and slurping up the last of his blood box.
"You and me both, honey," Blaine said. "But I can't say I dislike it."
"Neither can I." Kurt tucked his feet up next to him and placed his head on Blaine's shoulder, his default position for movie snuggles.
Some things never changed.
