You fall in love with her quickly.
Never mind that the world thinks it's wrong, disgusting; you love her. Every part of her. You love the way her hair falls in thick waves down her shoulder blades like a chocolate river, you love her brown eyes and sheepish smile. You have always loved her. Even as children, she was always been
your first love. Look at her, now. How much she's grown; it has truly been a privilige, knowing her through the years. See that smile? It makes you feel like the first time. God, look at those dimples. Can you believe it? Once upon a time, she wore sweaters, and braces, carried around her beloved pig.
And now, here she is, dancing in the moonlight, smiling that perfect smile, dazzling the room. Her purple dress accentuates her figure perfectly, and she rests her head against her lover's shoulder, eyes closing.
You should be happy; you got what you wanted. She has finally moved on; you are both better for this. At least, this is what you tell yourself. Nevermind that every second it becomes even more unbearable, seeing her in the arms of another. You wonder if it will ever get easier, you ask once again if it was worth it.
Of course it was. You could never make her this happy! Look at her, she's looking at you with those chocolate eyes. Those wide, beautiful orbs of color that seem to just pierce your soul. This is what she needed; a man who could give her everything she ever wanted.
You see her lips move, see her tongue curl over the syllables in your name. Please, you silently ask. Don't make this any harder.
But she does, yes she does. You see her slip from the grasp of her dancer, see her make her way across the room to you. Your heart starts to race, your hands start to sweat; the butterflies in your stomach have become garden gnomes.
"Dipper... May I have this dance?" She asks, holding out a hand.
Nonono no you cannot, because then you'll have to touch the small of her back, dip her into a waltz, and you know, before it's even happened, you will lean down, close the space between you, and kiss her.
And then all of this pain will have been for naught. You will be ashamed in front of the home school, she'll lose her one chance at true love, at real love, and-
her voice shakes you from your thoughts.
"You're over thinking again, bro-bro."
Yes, yes you are. But can't she see you're doing this for her? That you broke your own heart, so she'd have a chance at happiness? She deserves more than secret dates, than quick love making in the attic. She deserves flowers every morning and her family at her wedding, she deserves the world, and you cannot give her it, try as you might.
You adjust your tie, try not to look at her. She's giving you the look, the one where tears sparkle at the corners of her eyes, the one you cannot resist. God, she looks beautiful, ravishing, stunning, transcendant- just one dance, you tell yourself. And then you will stop this insanity.
No, it can't be insanity when she keeps you sane.
You slip your hand into hers, allow her to drag you to the dance floor. Her arms wrap around your neck, such a personal and comfortable position, so familiar.
"Please don't do this, Dipper. I love-"
"Don't, Mabes. Don't say that," you whisper hoarsely, glancing around. You feel her soft hand direct your attention back to her, but you aren't done. You have so much more to say, and so little time. The song is already almost over.
"I love you more than life itself; and I'm doing this because of that. We can't-"
Her eyes blaze with a kindled fire. "We can't what, Dipper? Love eachother?"
Mabel's voice is rising, even above the music. People are starting to turn and look.
"Don't tell me you're ashamed of me?" She whispers, and those tears threaten to fall with every passing second. You have not seen her cry since you both left Gravity Falls, all those years ago. She's giving you that look again, the one you can't resist.
And, damning the consequences, you give in. You allow yourself to be pulled back into her inescapable gravity; you watch the stars in her eyes glimmer with hope; and she gives you such a look of relief as you press your lips to hers.
