Title borrowed from Hamlet, wherein the Prince of Denmark laments the smallness of Denmark, that he longs to be in the great expanse of the world, but is tethered to Denmark and all of her many woes.

Though Loki's journey is less a quest for truth, more a quest of self discovery, along with Jane, he learns in this tale to be more than simply a King of Asgard…more than what he had imagined his reign to be, and less, too. So Loki Odinson, in this story, will grow as a King in many ways, conquering much, not least of which, himself.

Somewhere in between the black of space and the tenebrous cloak of night a quiet whisper emerged, suggestive in tenor, and tickled her neck with it's breath.

You will grow old and die.

And what of it? Everyone does. Jane Foster dismissed it on the balcony of her lover, the King. Loki took little sleep, less food, but remained attentive to her still. His love was her constant, and she cherished it above all else.

But a weight in the weeks following his and Thor's ascension to the throne had grown. He was insistent that he obtain one of Iduna's apples so that Jane could remain with him for many hundreds, perhaps thousands of years. It would be a harrowing journey, one that he would take alone, and Jane was fraught with anguish at the thought of him putting himself in danger.

Yet in her quiet, she began to think herself a very selfish creature. Were her wants more important than his? Did he somehow matter to her more than she did to him? He was King, she noted. That in and of itself carried with it great importance, and made his life more precious, if only quantitatively; more people desired his well being than her's…he was a King. But, Jane reminded herself, he had done much to prove himself, and perseverated on the fact that he was not willing to live without her. Dramatic, to be sure, a bit Shakespearean a la Romeo and Juliet, but there it was.

She re-entered the room and went to dress. Loki was long gone, his meetings and councils took him away quite early. He insisted this was a temporary thing, that it would last but a week or so longer, and then he shall set out to Hel for an apple.

He's suggesting he go to Hel, and an image of Dante's Inferno blinked before her eyes…though everyone was insistent that it was really nothing like that, Jane couldn't stave off the thought. Loki would descend to a netherworld of fire and lava, and Jane would stay here in Asgard, where light and music and soft air pervaded. It was not to be born.

What if…

What if she had Thor and Sif train her? What if she, Jane, became a warrior like Sif? Loki would need not go alone, she might even be able to help. She had a few weeks…what if that was her condition? What if she said to him, fine, go. But I'm going with you…? That way she would know what was happening, she would not stay here and suffer, she could go and…and…

Not be alone. Not be left behind, as she had been her entire life.

Selfish, selfish wretch, Jane despaired.

The thought of being trained in combat was attractive, though. After all, Sif was, and if this plan was to work, Jane and her would be Queens together. If she never learned, she would be the only reigning monarch who didn't know how to fight.

Reigning monarch. Jesus.

Jane churned these ideas over and over in her head, convincing herself that this was the path to take. This was the answer to the dilemma which poisoned her mind and ate at her soul. This would be her bargaining chip to play when she confronted Loki.

Jane sighed, and brushed her fingers over the violet gem which hung at her breast. She seldom took it off, for she felt quite naked in its absence. Only when she went to bed did she divest it from her person.

Loki's sorrow and love manifested physically in utter beauty and pricelessness. She smiled. Never had anything so completely beautiful been wrought from such misery.

Jane turned toward the bed before she left the room for breakfast. She never slept in it without him…she would fall asleep in the oddest of places…recalling it began on her brief return to Earth, sleeping on her sofa, not in her bed. And since, in the garden, in the chair…exhaustion would overtake her, and she would collapse. But it was more than that…the thought of taking her sleep in bed without him was somehow strangely abhorrent to her mind. He had become her peace, and his presence necessary for her to enjoy it.

She would have no peace without him - how could he go without her?

He wouldn't, she decided. Her mind firm, her resolve undeterred. This would be her bargain, and Loki would either accept it or not go on this ridiculous journey.


Jane made her way down to the dining area (she had mastered a few paths among the castle), and saw Sif already eating. The Kings were not there.

"Morning, Sif," Jane smiled.

"Lady Jane," she replied, a hint of nerves in her voice.

Jane recalled herself. "Oh! Is today the day?" Sif was to accept the crown that day, and it slipped Jane's mind in her reverie.

"It is," Sif played with the food on her plate.

Jane smiled. "Are you nervous?"

Eyes shot up in a defensive glare. "I am not. I'm just…well. I'm distracted. I cannot think of what to say as an acceptance of the crown."

"Oh, is that all? I can help that…" and then Jane thought a moment. "You know, Sif, we might be able to help each other."

"How?" Sif appeared to be intrigued.

"Well…you're a warrior…and I can express myself fairly easily…as can you, by the way…but I can't fight. Maybe we could tutor one another?" Jane smirked hopefully.

"You wish to learn how to fight?"

"Very much."

Sif looked crookedly at her interlocutor. "Why?"

Should she be forthright? It wouldn't do to be deceptive, not when she was looking for help. "Well, I mean to go with Loki to Hel, and it's best I learn how to protect and defend myself."

A blank stare. And then SIf burst into laughter. "You?! Does the King know?"

Jane pouted at the reaction, and took a sip of what could only be described as a sort of coffee. "No. But I will tell him…"

"Tell me what?" Thor entered, Loki following in his wake.

"There are two Kings, brother, and if you apply logic to the situation, you'll see that the likelihood of Jane wanting to discuss anything with your majesty is quite low," Loki observed.

"Loki, if you shut up as often as I told you to, you'd never speak."

"And if I listened to you at all, I'd likely be dead," and Loki sat next to Jane.

She laughed at him, and turned to face him completely. No use in waffling, and Thor and Sif would be integral to her plan being a success. "Loki…" she began.

He leaned into her, and brushed his lips across hers. "Yeesss?" he purred.

Jane returned the kiss, but pulled away. She cleared her throat. "I want Sif and Thor to teach me combat so that when you descend to the netherworld I can go with you and be of some use and not be completely hopeless and be able to fight and defend myself and maybe even be able to help you." Wow. That was a lot of words in one sentence without pause.

Thor began to clap.

Sif laughed.

Loki glared. "What." There was no lilt, it wasn't a question.

"Do I need to say all of that again?" Jane asked.

No response.

She sighed, "I want to learn…"

"Stop," said Loki, putting his hand up. "You are most certainly not going to do any such thing. What gives you the idea that this is, in any way, good? You are mortal, fragile, you'll die," he was being indelicate.

"I think its a fine idea," observed Thor.

"You would," replied Loki. "Make mention of a fight, and you come scampering in, drooling like a dog."

"Why shouldn't the lady be trained? This is as much about her as about anyone…much more so, actually."

"Because, your Highness," sarcasm fell from his Loki's lips. "The very point of this is that she won't die…until Jane is an Aesir, she shall not learn to fight."

"Um," Jane began. "Look, I understand…maybe you could teach me too, Loki. Maybe I can learn all about Hel, and what I'll be facing…and you can teach me some combat, too…but I am not about to waver here," and she took his hand, and looked at him steadily. "This is my resolve. Either I go with you, or neither of us do."

Loki swallowed. "You are challenging me?"

Well, not exactly, Jane thought. "Yes."

A thin smiled crept along the corners of his mouth, and he looked her up and down, dissecting her with his eyes. "I like it," he said, breathlessly.

"Ok…are we done here, Sif?" Thor getting up, sensing an intimate moment approaching. "We should prepare for your crowning this evening…Jane," he turned toward her, snapping Jane out of her trance. "I think tomorrow we should start. See you later, brother," he shook his head, and left with his wife.


"There are many things you should understand, Jane," Loki was pacing their bedchamber in a frantic manner. "You may very well be putting me at risk, for Iðunn and I have a less than amicable history…"

"What happened?" Jane asked, watching him prowl along the path he had assumed in his state.

"She claims I tricked her and stole her apples."

"Did you?"

He stopped and looked at her. "Well…that's a very rough way to put it."

"Then put it more delicately," Jane smiled.

"I…" he began. "Odin desired the apples for Asgard…he was going to retrieve the tree himself, but that didn't go quite to plan. In my desire to win favor, I went to Iðunn, and lured her out of her garden by conjuring an image of a young child lost…I cloaked myself in invisibility, but she discovered before I could obtain the tree. I only managed a few apples," he shrugged. "She was not pleased, and we fought."

"Who won?"

He smirked. "I did."

"Oh."

He went to her and knelt before her. "You understand I am doing this to spare myself the pain of watching you age and die…to assure that I will not need to suffer many centuries in your absence. I am selfish, love…this is for me, not you."

"Don't turn this around. I am going with you, Loki."

He growled and stood. "There is nothing I can say to deter you? Nothing that will convince you that this is a silly, foolish, ridiculous, dangerous, and generally very bad idea?"

"You just made me want to do it even more," and she laughed.

"Silly mortal. You have no idea what you are in for."

"Ah hah! I win!" Jane stood and went to him.

"You claim victory, do you…"

"I do! We can begin studying now…oh, this is exciting…" she went to his bookshelves and began pulling books from the shelves in a frenzy.

And Loki watched her, smiling. She was so innocent, so full of vigor, so lovely in her tiny win…and he would need to assume the burden of keeping her safe in Hel. How in the name of Odin was he to manage that? To steal an apple would be task enough, not one that many would attempt…but to have the added burden of keeping her safe, Jane must be safe, above all else, would be trying.

It warmed him to his core that she wanted to go. That she loved him as much as he revered, worshipped, adored, loved her…and he knew her, which meant that if he didn't acquiesce, she would sneak into the underworld, putting herself at such risk he would lose her forever.

He shivered. He went to her.

He sat in the green chair opposite her, smiled, and picked up a volume. "We shall begin here…"