A/N; just some short, MorMor stuff I felt compelled to write the other night in a rush before I had to go to rehearsals.
[Jim]
I rolled over, away from Seb knowing that he would want to talk now. We always had our deeper conversations after sex because each of us were still open from such an intimate act. But tonight, I didn't want to talk. There was no way of getting Seb to shut up once he started, so I let him natter in my ear for a few minutes before he finally figured it out.
"Jim, are you alright?" I heard the genuine concern in his voice… and it fucking hurt.
"Seb-…astian," I couldn't play around now. I would hurt him, I would even yell at him and toss him out on the street. I couldn't handle this…. feeling.
He pulled me by the shoulder onto my back. "What's wrong?"
I looked into his green eyes, sparkling with concern and just a hint of curiosity, I couldn't do this. I knew everything I planned would go down the drain fast. Best not to bother at all. "Seb… I want you to know that…" I took a deep breath and I saw Seb next to me. He still had his hand on my shoulder. I threw it off. "I want you to know that it's over. We're no longer together. I'm sorry."
I waited. For a long second, battling internally to keep everything in check. I could feel Seb start to tremble beside me. "Fine. Jim, fine. What… whatever you say," his voice was shaking violently and fuck I wanted to reach out and hold him. So fucking badly. "Whatever you say…"
I waited again, for him to move for him to say something. But he just stared at me.
"You're not… you're not joking. Are you?" he retracted away from me a bit, his hands still less than an inch from me. "Jim! Are you fucking with me? Are you?"
I paused for a second, swallowing back the painful lump in my throat. "No," though I know I wasn't entirely convincing.
Seb took the extra sheet with him as he leapt off the bed. "What the fuck brought this on? What… what's going on Jim?" he wrapped it around his waist and I couldn't help but sweeping my eyes over his body one more time.
"I don't…" I start, but I have to stop. What the fuck is wrong with me? I'mcaring for someone? When did that start? "I- can't. I don't want to be in a fucking relationship anymore Seb!" actual frustration poured into my voice. I was angry at myself for falling in love. It's not an advantage! People use it against you! What the fuck would I do now if Seb was killed? I can't reverse this. I can try. Fucking oath I can try but it'll never go away completely. "I can't!"
Suddenly, Seb seemed to get it. His face softened and he dropped the sheet. It was then that I saw the tears glistening on his cheeks. "Everyone needs someone, Jim. Everyone. Even you," he lowered himself back onto the bed and placed a still shaking right hand on my chest. "Love is an advantage. Love makes you see the good in others. To care about someone is to open up and let them in," Seb takes my right hand in his left and pulls me into a sitting position. "Love and affection is a basic psychological need. You need it. And Jim, I don't care how much you try to push me away I'll always come back."
Words couldn't describe the feeling that I got then, a kind of warmth I'd never felt before in my stomach and chest. And for a second, my head shut up. It stopped. It didn't look around and calculate angles, mathematical or theoretical equations for everything around me. For the first time since I was a teenager, everything stopped and all I saw was Seb. "I love you."
He nuzzled into my neck, sucking lightly before pushing me down on the bed and laying on top of me. The weight was comforting and his heat was brilliant in the early morning chill. "I love you too, Jim."
