How To Plan A Christmas Party

... So, that's the plan.

Doctor, I still don't see the point of this.

Heh. Funny you should mention points. Because of your pointy ears, you'll make the perfect elf!

That's nice, Bones. So, who do I get to be?

Well, you... uh...

What? Why are you laughing, Chekov?

Pfft... heheh... no reason, sir. Just... it's wery funny, that's all...

What is so funny?

Captain, I've located your costume.

Well, Jim, do you like it?

... is this some kind of a joke?

I fail to see the humor in it, Captain.

You never do, Spock. Jim, all of us decided that you should be Santa Claus.

And why is that, Bones?

Because... you're the leader? We're uh... we're your elves!

May I ask, Doctor, why you keep pointing to me and referring to me as a mythical creature?

No, seriously. Why am I Santa?

... Heh...

Tell me!

Heehee!

Shut up, Chekov!

Yes, sir.

Okay, you want to know the real reason, Jim?

Yes, please.

Because the suit is too big for anyone else.

... and?

And all of the elf suits are too small for you.

... you could've made me a reindeer.

Ha! How is that less humiliating, Keptin?

I said be quiet, Ensign!

Yes, Keptin.

We really did consider that for you, but we couldn't find a light bulb for your nose.

... Sometimes I really hate you guys.

We love you too, Jim.

This is very illogical.

You can say that again!

This is very-

You shut up, too!

So, you should go try on your costume...

I'd rather not.

Come on, Spock's gonna be dressed up, too! If he's willing to prance around as an elf, you should be willing to shake your belly around and wear a beard!

That's not funny, Bones!

And Doctor, I refuse to "prance around". I find this most distasteful.

Isn't that was Christmas is about?

I thought Christmas vas about wodka.

When you get rigt down to it... kind of. After all, that's what inspired this party!

And these damn costumes, too, huh?

Yep.

I'll say it again: sometimes I really hate you guys.

Merry Christmas, Jim.

Just shut up and give me the costume...