Love Beyond Measure
Hogwarts!Brittana: The real reason Santana thinks it's better without eye contact, and how she learns she was wrong.
Thanks to my last-minute betas, PrairieJane and terriblemuriel. Patronus idea borrowed from an illustration by afterlaughs. Plot adapted from a GKM prompt and set in the Hogwarts world. Fluffy, sweet, and campy.
Santana was pissed. Of course she'd been sorted into the most boring House of all. Ravenclaws had no street cred and to be honest, all the Ravenclaws Santana had met were about as entertaining as a trip to the apothecary. But apparently the Sorting Hat never lied, so she let out a heaving sigh and slunk back to her table. She stuffed herself with sweets and followed the other first-years back to the Ravenclaw tower in the west wing of the castle.
That first year in Ravenclaw, Santana observed the older girls in her house. She begrudgingly admitted that they weren't all boring. They were witty and clever, and not as goody-two-shoes as she had expected for people who were so studious. For example, in her second year, after making her swear not to tell Professor Flitwick - not that he would do anything about it - one of the Prefect girls taught Santana the spells she would need if she ever decided to have sex with any of the young wizards of the castle. Not that she was ready for that. Gross.
But after her third year, Santana started to think maybe the wizards weren't all gross. Some of them were cute. Kind of. But they didn't seem to notice her, going instead for Gryffindor girls like Quinn or the Slytherin girls like Rachel.
The first boy who noticed that Santana wasn't a child anymore was Noah Puckerman, a Syltherin also in his fourth year. Of course he had to be from the house that everyone whispered about. All fifteen years of her life she'd heard nothing but bad things about Slytherin.
But to be honest, that made Noah more intriguing. Perhaps sneaking into the Forbidden Forest with him would bring a little buzz to Ravenclaw house and separate Santana from the studious reputation everyone else in her House had. She knew Ravenclaw girls had a wicked side, but no one else did. So she and Noah started meeting in the Forest at least once a week. Puck was especially good at finding corridors out of the Slytherin dormitory through the dungeon, somehow avoiding Filch and Mrs. Norris, and Santana was good at stunning anyone she ran into while tiptoeing out of the Ravenclaw tower. Together they never had a problem sneaking out.
Puck was the first person Santana let touch her under her robes. In the darkness of the forest, it was hard to tell the difference between the blue of her tie and the green of Puck's as they lay discarded over a fallen tree. Santana liked being touched. It felt good. She decided she was ready to have sex with him, and he was all too eager to oblige.
But then it went all wrong.
See, whenever Santana felt like she was about to burst and looked up at Puck, begging him to keep going just a minute longer, his jaw would drop open and he'd gasp and she could instantly feel him finish. She'd sigh, roll her eyes, and slide out from underneath him, doing a few quick clean-up spells and incantations because she was not planning to have wizard babies anytime soon.
She thought maybe it was just Puck's problem. So she tried sleeping with Finn, a Gryffindor that everyone had started whispering was actually a Squib, since he could never get any spells to work. That should have been a clue, because he had the same problem. As soon as she looked down at his doughy, luminescent body beneath her, he convulsed, and with a quick apology, rolled over.
So Santana sought out other wizards. It seemed the whole Slytherin Quidditch team was all too eager to accompany her to the forest, and Santana began to wonder what was said about her in their common room when Professor Snape wasn't around. She was pretty sure she was developing a reputation, but she tried to brush it off, reminding herself that at least she was being set apart from the rigid reputations of some of the Gryffindor girls like Quinn. But she tired of the Slytherin liaisons quickly and started just taking care of herself. At least that way she always got to finish.
When Sam Evans transferred from Durmstrang into Gryffindor - other students whispered his dad had been practicing some bad magic - he immediately drew attention from the other witches for his skills on the Quidditch field, not to mention his dashing good looks. Figuring Sam probably hadn't heard anything about her reputation, Santana pursued him. If his stamina on the Quidditch field was any indication, Santana figured he might actually be able to last long enough for her to finish. So she lured him into the woods one night and they enjoyed a decent roll in the brush. It was good enough for Santana to continue sneaking out with him. He was a fantastic kisser, and the first few times they had sex, she actually came. She hoped that meant her woefully unsatisfying sex life was taking a turn for the better.
But unfortunately it didn't last. One night she was seconds away from finishing and she looked up at him and the same damn thing that had happened with all the other boys happened.
"Whoa, Santana," Sam gasped a moment later, still panting next to her. "Your eyes..."
"I'm pretty sure that was my lady parts," Santana muttered, resigned to the fact that she would never really get to enjoy sex again. She would just have to take care of herself for the rest of her life.
"No," Sam insisted, shaking his head as he shut his eyes, trying to catch his breath. "I wasn't even close. And then you looked at me and I just... came."
Santana scoffed. "That's impossible."
"No, seriously," Sam insisted. "Give me a minute and we'll try again. I'm not lying to you."
So they tried again. After only a few seconds of moving together, Sam whispered, "Okay, now look at me."
And as soon as she did, he came, instantly.
"Dude..." he gasped, pulling back from her a bit wide-eyed. "I can't believe it's true..."
"What's true?" Santana demanded, hurt. "What have you heard about me?" She was half angry, half scared of what he would say. She thought Sam was above all the gossip.
"Well... um..." Sam mumbled. "Before one of our Quidditch matches last week, I heard one of the Slytherins saying that if you looked him in the eyes while you were... you know... then he would come right away."
Santana was dumbfounded. Could that be the reason none of the guys had lasted long enough for her?
It couldn't be.
"That's impossible," she snapped, pulling on her robes. "You'd have to be an idiot to believe that."
She brushed herself off and ran back to the castle, not caring that Sam wasn't as good at sneaking around the castle grounds as she was.
Secretly, she was heartbroken. She realized that none of those boys had ever liked her; they were just using her because she had some strange power she couldn't control.
The next day Santana was expecting a package from her father, but it didn't arrive at breakfast. In fact, her owl, Etheridge, didn't show up at all. She wasn't in Ravenclaw tower after Santana's first class either, so that afternoon before supper, Santana went to the owlery to find her.
When she got to the top of the drafty tower, she was surprised to find another witch there. A tall, blonde Hufflepuff girl stood looking out of one of the paneless windows down at the grounds with the saddest look on her face.
Santana didn't know what to say. "Did you lose your owl too?" she asked, scanning the roosts for Etheridge.
"No..." the girl sighed, still looking down at the grounds. "I don't have an owl. I have a cat."
Santana nodded, unsure what to say next. She double-checked the roost where Etheridge usually sat, finding it empty, and figured her package would arrive the next morning.
But it seemed cold to leave the girl standing there when she looked so sad.
"Is something wrong?" Santana asked.
The girl sighed, her shoulders drooping.
"Everybody thinks I made magic with the whole Gryffindor Quidditch team, but it's not true," she mumbled.
"Made magic?" Santana asked.
The girl nodded, her pout drooping even more.
"What kind of magic?" Santana pressed.
"Boy and girl magic," the other girl said.
Santana realized the Hufflepuff girl was talking about sex. If she hadn't looked so sad, Santana might have giggled. She didn't think sex was that magical. Well, for her at least.
"What's your name?" Santana asked.
"Brittany," the girl mumbled.
There was a moment of quiet as Santana watched Brittany and listened to the gentle hoots of the owls above. "Well, I believe you, Brittany," she said softly. "People talk about me too. The whole Slytherin Quidditch team, apparently."
Brittany nodded, finally looking up at Santana. "Thanks. And I'm sorry they talk about you too. They shouldn't say mean things about you. You're pretty and smart. I mean, you have to be to be in Ravenclaw."
Santana was surprised. Brittany was being nice for no reason. But then again, she was a Hufflepuff. "Thanks," she muttered. "You're pretty and smart too."
Brittany's pout returned. "Most people don't think so. No one believed me when I told them I was the one who figured out the riddle to get into Ravenclaw tower my first year."
"That was you?" Santana asked.
Brittany nodded, reciting, "What gets longer when pulled, fits between your boobs, inserts neatly in a hole, and works best when jerked?"
Santana's eyebrows shot up. She couldn't imagine Ravenclaw tower actually using that riddle as its passcode.
"A seatbelt," Brittany answered. "It's part of a Muggle car."
Santana burst out laughing. "That must have been on April Fool's," she chortled.
A smile spread across Brittany's face, pleased with herself.
"Have you ever used a seatbelt?" Santana wondered.
Brittany nodded but her smile vanished. "I know a lot about Muggles. I think that's why people say mean things about me making magic with the whole Gryffindor Quidditch team..."
Santana took a few steps closer to Brittany.
Brittany glanced to the side. "One time I got so upset when I heard them talking about me I used a Confundus charm, even though they don't teach that until upper level Charms."
Santana smiled. "Did it work?"
Brittany nodded, turning up the corners of her mouth in an impish smile. "Really well," she said. "Noah Puckerman locked himself in an outhouse and accidentally tipped it over."
Santana burst out laughing. "I think you could definitely be a Ravenclaw," she said, "You're more clever than half the girls in my tower."
Brittany's smile grew even more smug. "Then I made Noah fall in love with this awful girl who pushed me over in Transfiguration once."
Santana giggled. She liked this girl a lot. "Hey, do you want to come to dinner with me?" she offered. "I heard the elves are serving spaghetti and meatballs tonight."
Brittany nodded. "If we run into anyone saying mean things about you, I'll show you the Confundus Charm."
"Sounds like a plan," Santana grinned.
Santana and Brittany began meeting in the Owlery every afternoon after Brittany's Charms class and Santana's Transfiguration class. Santana got butterflies in her belly every day as she climbed the steps. Brittany would always get there first and be leaning against a wooden post, gazing up at the owls when Santana arrived. When she did, Brittany would grin at her and she would murmur a greeting so soft and gentle it sounded like another owl call. Brittany showed Santana the Confundus charm on Noah's owl and Santana showed Brittany how to stun on that obnoxious Slytherin girl Rachel's owl. The hours until supper seemed to fly by quicker than a snitch.
When Brittany kissed Santana for the first time, Santana felt like her heart could take flight and soar over the grounds like the birds in the rafters above them. She slammed her eyes shut as tight as she could. She kissed Brittany until Brittany pulled away, breathless.
"There's something I want to tell you," Brittany whispered.
Santana was nervous. "What is it?"
"Well... I feel like you should know... because maybe you wouldn't want to kiss me any more if you knew..." she swallowed, "I'm a mudblood."
That wasn't what Santana expected at all. "Oh!" she said, a little surprised. "Oh, um... that's okay," she sputtered.
Brittany's face brightened. "It is?"
Santana gave her a timid nod. "I don't think there's anything wrong with Muggles. Sometimes... sometimes I think they have it easier," she mumbled, thinking that Muggles would never have to deal with her special "power." Because it didn't feel like a power at all. It felt more like a curse.
After a few weeks of kissing in the owlery every day, Brittany put her arms around Santana. "I really like you," she whispered in Santana's ear.
Santana couldn't help the grin that spread across her face. "I really like you too," she said. "More than any of the wizard boys." Her heart fluttered as she spoke.
"I like you more than wizard boys too," Brittany murmured. "And... I want to make magic with you."
Santana's heart raced and her mouth went dry. She wanted to have sex with Brittany. She really did. But she knew that it would be even more disappointing than it had been with the wizard boys, because she really, really liked Brittany, and having sex would ruin everything. All because of her stupid curse.
But then she had a thought - when she had been with Sam and didn't look him in the eyes, it was decent. So maybe if she just closed her eyes, it could feel really good with Brittany and she wouldn't mess it up. And if Brittany's hands felt as good as her kisses, then...
Yes, Santana definitely wanted to "make magic" with Brittany. More than she could imagine Brittany wanted to make magic with her.
"Okay," Santana whispered. "We can make magic." If she kept her eyes closed, maybe everything would be okay.
Santana didn't know where to go to make magic with Brittany. She didn't want to go to the forest; Brittany deserved a proper bed and some privacy from potential centaur onlookers. That had never happened to her, but she counted herself lucky. She thought of all the places in the castle she could take Brittany that would be safe, but everywhere had something wrong with it.
"The Room of Requirement," Brittany said, as if reading Santana's thoughts. "It's perfect."
Santana gave Brittany a shy smile because she was right; it was perfect. It was available any time and no one would be able to find them as long as they sealed the room.
Brittany pulled her by the wrist toward the corridor on the seventh floor where Santana had heard the room was. Santana followed, quickly out of breath, and not just because they were running.
When they got to the wall across from the tapestry of a wizard trying to teach trolls how to dance ballet, Brittany pulled out her wand - laurelwood with a unicorn tail hair core -and raised it to the wall. "We need a place where no one will find us, to make magic with our bodies, not our wands," she whispered.
Santana swallowed again. She hoped it would be magic.
When the wall opened, she saw inside was a beautiful four-post bed with clean silver-blue sheets under a warm gray canopy with a butter-yellow dust ruffle. The light was dim but warm, as if candles were burning, though she couldn't see any.
Brittany's smile grew soft as she led Santana inside, sealing the door behind them. Brittany cupped her cheek and grinned at her. Santana felt her insides melt when she saw the gentle sparkle in Brittany's eyes.
But then she remembered her curse. If she looked at Brittany while this was happening, it would all go wrong and Brittany would know how strange she was. So she kept her eyes closed.
When Brittany put her hand under Santana's robes, Santana shuddered with pleasure. Brittany's fingers were soft and gentle and she definitely wanted Brittany to touch her. But she knew she needed to keep her eyes closed. So as soon as they had taken off their robes and lain down, Santana squeezed her eyes shut as hard as she could.
After only a few moments, Santana felt better than she had with any of the wizards. She loved the way Brittany's pale, soft skin felt against hers. It was positively silky in comparison to the rough skin of the wizards, and the sheets beneath them were cloud-like compared to the damp ground of the forest. She was so glad she had let Brittany bring her here. She began to rock into Brittany's hand, panting and running her hands all over Brittany's backside. She was rapidly approaching release. When Brittany kissed her neck, Santana clutched at her head, holding her there. That way she couldn't accidentally look Brittany in the eye.
But Brittany pulled back and Santana barely had time to slam her eyes shut.
"Santana... open your eyes," Brittany urged.
Santana shook her head, arching back into the pillow. "It's better if I don't," she gasped.
"Just try it," Brittany encouraged.
Santana shook her head again as she fisted the sheets. She was so close and she didn't want to ruin anything. But the harder she fought to keep her eyes closed, the longer she sat on the precipice. Finally she grew so frustrated, she gave up and stilled Brittany's hand. She was glad she didn't have to see Brittany's face, because when Brittany spoke, she sounded scared and sad.
"Is it not good?" Brittany asked.
"No, Britt, it's good," Santana assured, still panting a bit. "It's really good."
"So why did you stop me?" Brittany asked. Santana could hear her pouting.
Santana decided she had to tell Brittany the truth. She liked Brittany more than she had ever liked anyone before. She liked Brittany so much she was pretty sure liked wasn't the right word. She didn't want to keep going if Brittany would laugh at her curse like everyone else.
"It's just... I have this problem," Santana admitted.
"Can you not make magic?" Brittany said, her pout turning concerned.
"Oh, I can make magic," Santana assured, raising her eyebrows over her still-closed eyes. "The problem is... whenever I look at someone while I'm trying, they finish before I do. That's what happened with the Slytherin boys. The only reason they wanted to be with me was so I could make them feel good with my eyes."
Brittany gasped, but not in alarm. "You're an Encantada Siren?" she breathed.
"A what?" Santana asked, finding it very difficult to keep her eyes closed.
"An Encantada Siren!" Brittany said, her voice turned up with a smile. "Someone who can enchant people during sex with her mind."
Santana didn't know there was a name for her power. "Um... I guess," she shrugged. "I don't really try to do it, though. It just... happens."
"That's so cool!" Brittany whispered. "I've never met an Encantada Siren. They're very rare."
Santana was so curious what Brittany's face looked like, she decided she had to open her eyes. But rather than risk taking Brittany by surprise, she shifted and wriggled under the covers so she wasn't touching Brittany at all. "I'm going to open my eyes now," Santana warned her.
"Okay!" Brittany whispered. She sounded excited.
Santana waited a second before she did, then opened only one eye a crack. When she saw Brittany's bright, curious face next to her on the pillow and nothing happened, she opened the other. Then she was perplexed.
"Nothing happened," Santana said, relieved.
Brittany shook her head and her cheek whispered on the pillowcase. "You're not touching me."
Santana nodded.
"What if - What if we try again and you only open your eyes when it's time?" Brittany suggested.
What hadn't Santana thought of that before? It was the perfect plan! She just had to wait until she was coming to open her eyes.
"Okay," Santana said. "Are you sure?"
Brittany smiled and gave her an enthusiastic nod before climbing under the covers with Santana.
But Santana thought it still didn't seem quite fair. Brittany had to work to make Santana come; all Santana had to do was open her eyes. And Santana really wanted to touch Brittany anyway, to know that she could make Brittany feel good without her eyes. So she closed her eyes and reached forward, but then thought it best to get permission.
"I want to touch you too," she whispered.
Santana heard Brittany's cheek whisper against the pillow as she nodded..
Santana reached out and ran her hand down Brittany's stomach. It was so soft and warm, she bit her lip to keep from whimpering. As she slid her fingers lower, she felt Brittany shift on top of her as her own breathing picked up quicker than ever before. When she dipped her fingers into the crevice between Brittany's legs, the air flew from her lungs for a moment. Brittany was so soft and so warm and so wet that Santana thought for a moment that she wouldn't care if she ever came again if she got to feel Brittany like this over and over.
Brittany's hand mirrored Santana's and slid between Santana's legs, rubbing circles for only a few moments before Santana released, crying out.
"Open your eyes," Brittany whispered.
Santana forced her eyes to open and found Brittany gazing down at her, illuminated by flashing lights and shooting stars.
At that Brittany fell on top of her, crying out in unison as they came together. Santana felt as if the whole room rippled outward in a powerful burst as they both seized from head to. She was sure it was the best feeling in the entire wizarding world.
It took them a long time to come down as they lay there tangled together. When Brittany rolled off Santana, she giggled under her breath. "You are definitely an Encatada Siren," she murmured. "One in a million. How did I get so lucky?"
Santana turned toward Brittany and studied the way her eyelashes made shadows on her cheeks for a minute. Brittany thought Santana's curse was a wonderful thing, something that made her special, rather than just different or strange.
"You know what I heard about Encantada Sirens?" Brittany asked with a renewed gleam in her eye.
Santana bit her lip and raised her eyebrows to ask.
"I heard some Encantata Sirens can make magic with someone special when they're not even touching."
"Hm..." Santana said, frowning. She had never been able to do that before. It seemed unlikely. But she had also never met anyone like Brittany before. "Well... you're special. We can try if you want."
Brittany just gave her a giddy grin and rolled onto her side facing Santana. Santana mirrored her, adjusting her head on the pillow. Brittany immediately fixed her gaze, the silvery-blue of her eyes shining in the dim light of the room.
Santana focused on Brittany. She thought about the way Brittany felt against her fingers and how good she wanted Brittany to feel when they made magic together. It was a wish that she could feel all over her body, surging from her chest through her limbs to the tips of her fingers and toes. She wanted to connect the wish to Brittany in some way.
"Can we not touch at all?" Santana wondered.
"We can touch," Brittany shrugged. "Just not in obvious places."
Santana nodded and reached across the sheets to lace Brittany's pinky with her own, resting it between them. As she felt the warmth from just that one little finger zip through her arm through the rest of her body, she gazed long and deep into Brittany's eyes. They were bright and honest and looking back at her with so much wonder and joy. Santana's chest ached with happiness.
And as she stared, she realized her breath was starting to lurch and a fresh sheen of sweat had started to prickle on her back and neck. She saw Brittany was starting to pant too, her mouth opening a little as she took deeper and deeper breaths. Santana squeezed Brittany's pinky and tried not to blink. Her heart raced and her center throbbed. She wanted to make Brittany feel that good again. Not just in her body, but in her heart as well.
With an overjoyed jolt, Santana realized she was in love. The realization swirled through her body and wound her up like a spring. In her mind, she spoke the words I love you.
At the exact same time, Brittany and Santana cried out. There was a flash of silver light and they both seized from head to toe, gaze fixed on each other. It was more powerful than any orgasm Santana had ever given herself, and certainly more powerful than any someone else had given her. It was so powerful that as soon as it was over, she slumped forward into Brittany, whimpering into her chest. Shutting her eyes once more, she never wanted to move. She let the warm darkness settle around her as her breathing evened and her pulse slowed down.
"Santana," Brittany gasped, a hint of awe in her voice as she tried to catch her breath. "Have you ever cast a patronus?"
Still recovering, Santana kept her eyes shut and shook her head. She was aware of a silver light drifting about the room. Through her eyelids it was like looking up at the sky from the depths of a lake.
"Santana, look!" Brittany said in wonder.
Santana opened her eyes to see two silvery figures dancing and leaping about over the four-post bed; two dolphins were chasing each other in circles, their outlines leaving silver streaks in the dim light of the room.
"Is that- do we have-" Santana stuttered.
Brittany nodded and nestled her head against Santana's shoulder. "We have the same patronus," she whispered.
"We did that?" Santana asked, incredulous.
"You did that," Brittany corrected. "With your magic."
Brittany snuggled into Santana's arms, sighing in contentment. Santana could feel Brittany's cheek crinkle up in a smile against Santana's shoulder as she murmured, "A thousand points for Ravenclaw."
