AUTHOR'S NOTE:

Notes:

It has been FAR too long since I've written anything decent for the Earthworm Jim fandom, so I've decided to stick with a simple plot-line for now, and just see how it goes. This piece is solely for fun! Please enjoy~

-CAST-
Sallie Knight, Captain Beauty (C) Wario-Girl
Meifeng (C) Kitsune-kami-shin
Miss. Dark (C) UmbraetheDark

Earthworm Jim and co. (C) Doug TenNapel


HONEY

Chapter 1: The Honey-Moon Bakery

Breathing.

That's all she focused on at that very moment.

Keep breathing…

Several bodies tumbled around her, slightly startling her, but she remained still.

Nice and slowly…

Keeping at a rhythm, it calmed her tensed body. Already, she could feel sweat beading on her forehead, rolling up towards her hairline, before falling. Many more followed, running up her cheeks towards the corners of her eyebrows. She closed her eyes and exhaled yet again.

Keep breathing…

"Al'right, ladies! Yer can relax now!" Came the shrill voice of her Yoga-Instructor.

With a sharp gasp of relief, Sallie Knight threw her legs back down onto the yoga-mat, resuming back to her kneeling position. She felt a smile of pride blossoming onto her face and couldn't stop it.

Finally, she had successfully performed the Supported Headstand. It was a gruelling task, but her body was finally able to sustain it. After several weeks of classes and countless falls.

Perking her head back up, she saw her Yoga Instructor giving her a rewarding smile of approval, her pointy-nailed hands on her hips. "Good one, Sallie! I knew yer could do it!" Ah, Mrs. Bleverage, certainly an interesting woman, brash and loud, with her curler-laden brunette hair and somewhat unsightly yellow tracksuit. But Sallie didn't judge. Mrs. Bleverage didn't care about anyone's opinion on her, and continued her life to improves others, not to impress them. That was something Sallie greatly admired, despite Mrs. Belverage's coarse and sometimes callous remarks. Yoga was supposing a relaxing class in Gym, but Mrs. Bleverage taught it as if it was the Army, which frightened many of her other clients. Except Sallie. She liked it, and certainly motivated her to take her lessons seriously, and to succeed in many difficult poses. Thankfully, Mrs. Belverage's punitive remarks to Sallie's previous failures had softened over the time, and now she only 'gently' makes a snarky comment here and there over Sallie's posture or hair. But overall, she was a pleasant lady to work with. Her heavy make-up and figure suggested that she was not the sort of woman who would perform Yoga Classes at her local Gym, but she was an expert on the mat, performing twists and bends that amazed, and horrified, her class. But it gave them hope.

Wrapping up the Yoga session, Mrs. Bleverage stood proudly in front of her army of women, their blushed faces gently soothed with the Gym's air-conditioning. Sallie took a long, deep breath, easing completely as she stood up with the others.

"Yer have all done well!" The round lady began, her thick eyebrows rising. "I am so proud of yer all, yer have improved yerselves so much! Now, go out into the world yet again, and be the proud, single ladies yer all are!"

The woman beside Sallie shyly held her hand up.

"Uh, actually, I'm married-"

"Proud, single ladies!" Mrs. Bleverage interrupted loudly and clapped her hands to dismiss the class. Everyone dispersed, gathering their belongings that sat along the back wall. Sallie eagerly grabbed her bottle of water and began to chug it only to stopped quickly when she noticed Mrs. Bleverage approaching her. "Sallie, can I have a word with yer for a moment?"

"Sure," Sallie replied, a little uncertain. "What's up?"

"Yer see, I've been thinking. I saw this guy in the Trailer Park the other day, and I thought that he would be a nice fit for yer,"

Sallie was surprised at the comment, but shook her head, kindly rejecting her incoming offer.

"Thank you for the thought, Mrs. Bleverage, but I'm not ready for anything right now,"

Mrs. Belverage's eyes widened, disturbed.

"Fifteen years of being single-!"

"Actually, ten," Sallie corrected her gently. "Besides, didn't you say that us women are better without men?"

"Well, yeah, sure, but…" She played with her manicured nailed for a moment. Sallie smirked, waiting for her response to the contradictions. Then: "Yer such a lovely girl. You have some good friends around yer, yer own a lovely Bakery…it's just kinda sad to see that you've got no man…y'know,"

Sallie smiled sadly. She appreciated Mrs. Bleverage's thoughtfulness, as impetuous as some may be. She was almost like the butch-maternal figure she never had.

"I understand, and like I said, I really appreciate the thought, Mrs. Bleverage, but a man is the reason why I left England in the first place. I know not all guys are like that but…. I don't know," She folded her arms and her eyes fell to the ground. "I guess I'm just too scared again,"

"I know how it is," The large lady swung her hand to pat Sallie's back sympathetically, the patting rough and heavy-handed, jerking Sallie forward. "But hey, I ain't gonna let my broken marriage happen to you too. Just do what I do, change yer name to 'Mrs'. That way, it keeps the men off you."

"True, but I'm not planning on scaring guys away from me, just not willing to chase them right now,"

Mrs. Bleverage respected that answer, and gave her a kind smile, the kindest one Sallie had ever seen. Suddenly, she looked like a mother finally seeing her daughter grow.

"I understand. But hey, yer ever need a man, just come to me,"

"I'll certainly keep that in mind, thank you,"

Mrs. Bleverage gave her one more smile before leaving her, returning back to her station for the next Yoga Session.

"See yer next week, Miss. Knight!"

Those who don't know Terlawk suffers from the delusion that it never gets hot there. They have this vision of everlastingly cool summers and bitter cold winters. But never heat, at least the way its experienced further south, and in the big cities.

Springtime had already adorned the trees with flat, oval leaves. Many of the trees that lined with the avenues were adorned in pink and white blossom, their silky perfect heart-shaped petals shimmering in the breeze, its stunning scent becoming diffused in the warm wisps of air.

And despite the youth of the season, the heat of Summer had arrived far too early for all 205 residences of Terlawk to prepare. Not that many minded. In fact, a lot of the local businesses thrived on the seasons. Heat is what brought customers out, to enjoy the sunny days.

It was always a pleasure for Sallie Knight when she left the Gym, her body had grown accustomed to their cooling fans, and the instant she stepped foot outside she was engulfed with a balmy heatwave, and she loved it. After relishing the warmth for a moment, she began to walk down the path towards her home. Unlike many of the residents, who lived in the Suburban part of Terlawk, Sallie lived in the small-town centre near the Terlawk Mall, where small businesses nestled tightly against one another and hugged the pavements. It was almost like a mini city of its own, cosy and always bustling with life. And when it was adorned with decoration, it was even better. Right now, the townsfolk have decked the town-centre already, with sunny banners that strung along the roof-eaves of red-bricked buildings in pretty shades of blues, whites and reds. Paper Lanterns hung over the pavements, wavering slightly in the pleasant breeze, their bright-colours stunning in the sunshine. Stalls had opened to the streets too, the owners hollering at customers to entice them to look at their goods, their tents shading them from the hot orb above them. To many tourists, the choice of décor could be rather questionable, almost as if the townsfolk were desperately trying to implicate a seaside-town theme to their dry-looking town, despite having no actual seaside nearby. But the efforts were always appreciated, and the weather certainly made it feel like a typical day at the sunny beaches.

It was a little unfortunate that Terlawk Town was more dry-looking with its stone-works and bricked houses, and with little-to-no greenery around except for the potted planters by countless windows. But this was home to many, as much as a playground for Super-Heroes and Super-Villains.

Yes, who would have thought a small town like Terlawk would be the centre point for battles between Good and Evil. While it happened on a few occasions, it had become the norm to the residents. Now, whenever a battle started, everyone just leaves the area, mostly out of fear, but the Super-Heroes were trusted, for many of them secretively lived in Terlawk too. So men in strange costumes, giants hamsters and women with singing voices that could set themselves alight in flames was normal for Terlawk, and perhaps that is one of the things Sallie loved about this small, quaint town. The extraordinary was just, well, ordinary. To an extend…

Unfortunately, throughout her time of living in Terlawk, Sallie had yet to witness a battle between Good and Evil. Terlawk had been untouched since the great battle between a worm and a slug, but since then the town had been at peace. It was probably a good thing, considering the circumstance of their position.

Eventually, she had found home, and took a moment to gaze upon the building before her. Her pride and joy. Her only route of escape from her troublesome past, and now it would be her forever home. At the corner of the street was her Patisserie and her home. A tall, narrow building that stuck out against the other typical buildings in the town. Flushes of flowers ornate the building, with decorative weaves of flowers hanging above the door, a couple of hanging-baskets full of pansies and two large windows from either side revealing the cute bakery and café inside. Flowery awnings hung above the large windows, shading the small, round tables and chairs. The welcoming sign above the door was written in gold featuring a beautifully-drawn moon, and a small smile came to Sallie's face:

THE HONEY-MOON BAKERY

The Patisserie's unique appearance often attracted customers, and it was certainly a fantastic way of meeting the locals and making friends. To think it used to be an ugly one-bedroom house…

After staring at her home for a moment, Sallie opened the door, and was almost knocked back by the warm smells of dough, cinnamon and coffee. Inside had many more small tables and chairs, dotted around in an organised fashion, ornamented with tiny vases of a single rose. And in the far corner was were the magic truly happened. The counters were heaped high with some of the most delicate breads and desserts, the glaze on the strawberry tarts shone as if they had been freshly polished that morning. Rows of Cupcakes, from the classic vanilla to the interesting 'Bacon-flavoured' ones, were displayed neatly behind the glass pane, followed by doughnuts of all kinds, cream tarts, scones and eclairs, which were freshly baked that morning. Fluffy shell-shaped madeleines, rainbow-coloured macaroons and bite-sized chocolate cakes brimmed with delight under the display lights, all very tempting.

Behind the counter was a woman Sallie instantly recognised. She was shaking flour over her wooden bench, and next to her the walls were neatly lined with bowls and trays. Fresh fruit tumbled out of wicker baskets, and huge stacks of flour and sugar leaned against the shirting board.

Now, there was no one in the café. A typical quiet morning, but they were expecting company soon when everyone leaves for their lunch-breaks. But that was not Sallie's biggest concern. She had a very important delivery to make later this evening.

Upon hearing the chimes from the front-door, the woman turned around and shined a cheerful smile at Sallie.

"Sallie!" Meifeng beamed, her crimson eyes sparkled in merriment. She was a very beautiful woman, with lengthy rosy-pink hair that framed her pretty face. She had tied it up in a bun while she was prepping the cakes for the afternoon. Meifeng was Sallie's best friend and had known each other for the last five years. Sweet-hearted by nature but timid around strangers, and certainly no fan of those who were intimidating. But in the company of good friends, she was always a delight. Sallie and Meifeng always knew that, in spite of this, Meifeng was not human. Her little quirks, like her small fangs and her unusual eye-colours, gave that indication. But regardless of this, Sallie still loved her as a sister. Despite her calm attitude, Meifeng was perhaps a little more dangerous and out of control when she first met Sallie. Lost and alone, without much acknowledgement from where she came from in the first place, Sallie was her only real connection to the human world. She did not understand many things about the life she was about to endure. But throughout many turmoil and plenty of stabbed cushions, Meifeng soon began to control herself. Sallie was so very proud of her development. Of course, she would have the occasional spaz out of control, as much as Sallie would sporadically snap with her terrible temper, but neither of them minded it. They knew one another more than anyone else and accepted each other as they are. Meifeng was Sallie's 'adopted' sister, and no one can tell her otherwise.

Meifeng's unusual features had often terrified the older residents in Terlawk at first, ironically, and what usual ends up with Sallie being beaten numerous times by whooping canes and handbags whenever some attempted to push Meifeng away, eventually her sweet-nature grew onto them, and they now utterly adore her, more than Sallie at times, to their amusements. She was harmless…for all they know.

Meifeng waved a hand at Sallie, her fingers and cheeks covered in flour. "How did Yoga go?" She asked excitingly.

"Very good, thank you," Came the reply as Sallie walked in, pushing the little gate by the counters to gain access. Making her way towards the back of the store, where a small, rustic-like living room was, Sallie put her bag onto the baroque sofa. "Mrs. Bleverage is getting softer on me,"

A high, cheerful laugh could be heard from the Café.

"Is she, now? She must have grown onto you," Meifeng rolled her eyes with a cheeky smirk, grabbing the dough and began to knead it again, sprinkling more flour onto it.

"It seems that way," Came back the reply from the other room. Meifeng could hear Sallie getting ready to join her. Lunchtime was nearing. "Heard from Miss. Dark yet?"

"Yeah, she came by about an hour ago. Told her you were at the Gym, so she said she'll come back later tonight. She said she had found some really cool stuff that she wanted to show us,"

"Oooh, sounds dangerously intriguing," Meifeng could feel Sallie's grin in her voice. She stretched the dough in her hands, watching it form into thick strings of bread until she melded it back into a smooth ball.

"Oh, by the way, you know what you're going to make for the ceremony?"

"I have an idea…"

Sallie soon returned, tying her hair into a thick ponytail and turned to the sink, washing her hands. "I thought the Bacon-Flavoured Cupcakes weren't gonna cut it,"

Meifeng was surprisingly disappointed.

"Are you sure? They're our top-sellers,"

"Yes, but…this is for the Super-Heroes, the very Galactic Heroes League themselves! One of their very first female Heroes has recently turned 70, and I doubt she'd like Bacon-Flavoured Cupcake!" Sallie giggled, the very thought of an older lady scoffing layers upon layers of crispy bacon amusing to her.

"It's a shame it's so last minute though," Meifeng replied, patting the dough ball down. "We could have made a huge platter of cakes and desserts. Just to say thank you, to all of them,"

"I know, I know," Sallie sighed sadly. She felt the same way too. "But the Hamsternator told me their last caterer got crushed by a cow, so they needed someone else,"

Meifeng blinked and looked at Sallie with furrowed brows.

"…how do you get crushed by a cow?"

Sallie shrugged.

"Beats me," Standing by the counter, Sallie rubbed her chin and pondered for a moment. Meifeng watched her for a time.

"So…?"

"I'm designing the cake in my head. I want something unique, but impressive,"

"Be careful, Sal, remember the last time you attempted to try something new." Meifeng couldn't suppress the giggle when she thought back to that memory. Their beautifully-decorated gothic cake they made especially for Miss. Dark's birthday last year was too top-heavy and fell onto Miss Dark, tiny sugar-skulls and ghostly candies scattered everywhere in her dining room. She was lucky for had forgiven them for it…eventually. But now the memory was humorous to the three ladies.

Sallie playfully slapped her arm for reminding her of the incident.

"I've learnt my lesson," Yes, she did. Clearing Miss. Dark dining… "Hmm, so I'm thinking of an elegant three-tier cake. Perhaps white and pink, spring,"

"How about cherry blossom?" Meifeng suggested, getting excited with the idea of creating a gorgeously extravagant cake. "Maybe-Maybe the cake can have branches coiling around it could be icing, with pink and white blossoms- Oh! Perhaps the cake can be a really soft blue instead of white!"

Meifeng was always good with bouncing concept ideas with Sallie once it came to the designs. Now, what was just a pretty cake became something so elaborate and flowery, stunning! There were moments where Sallie would be lost without Meifeng's beautiful mind.

"That sounds perfect. I'm sure she'll love it. Something not too simple or insulting. Just an elegant beautiful cake, for an elegant beautiful lady," Spying the sparkle of eagerness in Meifeng's eyes, Sallie rolled her eyes playfully and yielded. "And of course you can help,"

A squeal of exhilaration escaped Meifeng, as she pulled Sallie into a quick hug before hurrying towards the back.

"I'll get the icing!"

"Eaaasssy does it…" Sallie murmured, painfully slowly, her eyes locked onto a single petal of a cherry blossom, its delicate sugary form pressed gently yet steadily onto the cake's base. It had taken them a good few hours to work it out, but the cake was almost completed. It probably would have been done sooner if they didn't get so busy. They had to leave the cake to one side a few times to serve the customers, which didn't take them that long. The positive reaction from the customers of the work-in-progress cake was certainly encouraging and gave Sallie and Meifeng confidence that their creation was going to blow the Galactic Heroes League's minds. The colours of the cake were of gentle, soft pastel shades of blue, pink, white and brown, and Meifeng had focused her absolute attention to the detailing of each blossom petal and the branches. And to their disbelief, the cake was far more impressive and stunning than both had anticipated. Meifeng was sad to see it go tonight, but they took plenty of pictures of it once the cake was finished.

Sallie added the last detail of the cake, piping letters in delicate, soft pink handwriting:

Happy Birthday Captain Beauty

They took a step back, admiring the cake from a distance, and both sighed in relief to see that it was just perfect, and done in time.

"I don't want to give her this cake anymore," Sallie chuckled softly, glancing at her watch. The Ceremony was going to happen in no longer than two hours. And while making the cake itself was already a difficult task, transporting it was the worst.

Meifeng leaned her head onto Sallie's shoulder, smiling.

"Same…can we cancel?" She asked jokingly and received a mock-angry glare.

"The Hamsternator told me the Ceremony is going to take place in the Embers Lounge, they have a private function. I mean, I thought they'd take it to their Headquarters, but he said it was currently going under some maintenances,"

"You going to be okay?"

Sallie smiled, waving her hand.

"I'll be perfectly fine. We've done this over a million of times. Besides, Embers Lounge isn't that far," A heart laugh escaped her, brushing a long throng of brunette hair back behind her ear. "You okay minding the Bakery while I'm gone?"

"Oh, of course," Meifeng beamed. As much as she would have liked to visit the other Super-Heroes, the idea of it frightened her too much still. Understanding her reasons, Sallie was content with going on her own.

"If she causes any trouble, I'll keep an eye on her," A voice perked up from behind.

Sallie and Meifeng turned around to see another lady standing at the other side of the counter, and it appeared she had been watching them talk for a while. Sallie was relieved to see she wasn't a waiting customer, but another dear friend.

Miss Dark smirked back at Meifeng and Sallie, amused by their startled expression of her sudden appearance. No matter how many times she does that, she will always catch them off-guard. But they were hard-workers and very passionate about their creations, so it was no wonder they never assume Miss. Dark's presence until it was too late. Miss Dark didn't mind it though, it was fun for her. Ivory skin in black clothes, she was the perfect picture of a Gothic supermodel. Her physical appearance sharply contrasted against the typical colourful, and sometimes plain, humans in Terlawk, and it terrified a few residents. But she did not harm, just like Meifeng, and the people in Terlawk, unfortunately, were too rash to judge others by their appearance. Sallie was not one of them. She befriended people because she felt a wonderful kinship with them, despite their appearances. It was proof that you should never judge a book by its cover. Besides, Sallie really admired Miss Dark's unique style, with her short angled-bob hairstyle, which shared the same dark brown colour as Sallie, complimented with her signature crimson goggles and black hat. She wasn't hard to miss, an enigmatic 5'9'' woman in a black tank-top, cargo-pants and combat-boots, really stuck out. But that was never a bad thing for Sallie. She respected her so much for her style and attitude to life. But what was most unusual was that, well, Sallie and Meifeng didn't knew Miss. Dark's full, or perhaps, real name. Miss. Dark was the name she introduced to them with, and they respected it. There was only one Miss. Dark after all.

Sallie couldn't help but envy the lifestyle Miss. Dark had, how she could travel between Dimensions and return with some interesting goods from her travels. Perhaps one day Miss. Dark could bring her along. She adored her Bakery, of course, but sometimes it was simply too boring. She needed some excitement and hoping Terlawk's history with fighting Superheroes would quench that thirst. Still, nothing.

Meifeng placed her fists onto her hips, pouting playfully.

"What are you trying to say, Miss. Dark?" She giggled, and their friend's autumn-brown eyes sparked in mischief.

"I'm only playing," Miss Dark grinned, flapping her hand at Meifeng. She eyed the cake for a moment and was unable to hide the surprise off her face. "Wow, you guys have reallyoutdone yourselves!"

"Thank you," Both Meifeng and Sallie piped up, smiling proudly.

"I hope Captain Beauty will like it," Sallie added, and Miss. Dark shrugged.

"I don't see why she wouldn't," She rested her elbows onto the counter, cupping her chin with her hands. "She'd be stupid if she didn't,"

"It'll be fine, Sallie," Meifeng reassured her, expecting the comment ages ago. It happened all the time, Sallie gets a little anxious when showing off a new cake to some event, but the reception of it was always positive. Meifeng's crimson eyes blinked a few times, and then she turned to Miss. Dark, suddenly looking like an excited puppy. "Oh, Miss. Dark! You have things you wanna show us,"

Miss Dark grinned.

"I thought you would never ask," She chuckled, attempting to retrieve the items, but stopped. "Eh, want to see them later? Sallie, you'll need to get going soon, yes?"

Sallie nodded.

"Better to get there early than on time," She replied, patting her apron down. "I'll have to get ready,"

Meifeng and Miss. Dark shared a smile with her. It was going to be another great night.