Title: Standing Climbing Falling
Author: alienangel19852003
Summary: Jackson Stewart will never forgive himself for what happened to Miley, and Miley will never forget it. Nick Lucas won't stop loving Miley, but he knows that she won't ever return his feelings. Robbie Ray knows something is wrong but they won't tell him, he hopes moving his daughter out of the spotlight of her double identity Hannah Montana and letting her be Miley might help. Miley has been hiding so much from everyone and a girl named Lilly Truscott might be the only one who can help heal her.
Rating: M
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction and is written for fun I don't own anything nor do I make any money off of this.
**************************Chapter One***************************
****************************Just a Dream*************************
Miley woke herself up screaming, another night of the dreams. Her eyes flew open and she glanced around her bedroom adjusting to the darkness and the unpacked boxes looming in the shadows. She hated those dreams and she hated that they terrified her so much, and she hated that she woke the whole house up screaming. She was stronger than this she couldn't believe it was beating her. What would her mother think if she knew what'd become of her daughter?
She thought the dreams would go away when they moved to Malibu when she got her life back, but they didn't it was the second night spent in the new house right on the beach in the charmed life where she got to be herself without the blond wig and flashing lights.
She was sitting up in bed a sheen of sweat blanketing her body as she kicked away her comforter which wasn't much comfort actually. The door pushed open and she squinted in the dim light startled for a moment but relief washed over her when she saw it was her brother Jackson.
She and Jackson had never been particularly close even though they were brother and sister and relatively close in age. He was only three years older than her and he was into working on cars, belching and chasing girls. Miley had been musically inclined her whole life and her true talent lie in singing, and since she was a child that shoved her into the spotlight.
She understood why Jackson would resent her she'd been basking in everyone's attention for as long as she could remember. But being the center of attention had its drawbacks, and Miley knew the horrors of all of them. They used to fight like cats and dogs up until everything changed. Miley knew he felt guilty about what happened and since then they'd been amicable toward each other.
"Miles? Are you alright?" Jackson whispered his Tennessee accent still prevalent just as hers was after all these years living in California.
"I'm fine," Miley said nodding.
"You're lyin'," Jackson whispered, "I brought you some milk, it'll help you get back to sleep."
He brought her the glass of milk.
"Thank you," Miley said, "You don't have to do this every night."
"I do have to," Jackson said, "and I want to…you're my little sister that means you're my responsibility. If I had been lookin' out for you properly you wouldn't be waking up screamin' every night."
"I was stupid," Miley said, "and you shouldn't blame yourself, and it's my fault you got into all that trouble."
"It's not your fault and you're not stupid," Jackson said, "How many times do I need to tell you that?"
"What if he tells Jackson?" Miley said.
"We take life as it comes in this family remember? No worryin' about stuff like that," Jackson said, "Now you drink that and get some sleep. I'll stay with you and keep the bad dreams away."
Miley gulped down her milk under the watchful eye of her twenty year old brother. Jackson took the blanket he'd brought in with him and curled up on her window seat that over looked the beach.
"Goodnight Jackson," Miley said setting her glass on the bedside table.
The next morning was business as usual, they sat around the kitchen bar with their father after Miley had quietly made breakfast. Robbie, their father had tried to ask if anything was wrong, Miley had been different in the past three months and so had Jackson and Miley knew their father noticed, she just couldn't tell him and Jackson wouldn't tell him.
The phone rang and Miley flinched watching her father warily as he reached for the cordless receiver.
"It's Jake Ryan," he reported, "Do you wanna talk to him or not?"
"Tell that dick to go fuck himself," Jackson said getting up from the table and putting his plate in the sink he grabbed his keys slipped in his sandals and disappeared out the front door.
"Jackson Rod Stewart!" Robbie Ray exclaimed.
"I can't…" Miley whispered closing her eyes, "Tell him I'm not here."
Robbie nodded and hit the talk button and told the boy just that. he ended the call and looked back at Miley.
"What's going on Miley?" Robbie demanded, "You never tell me anythin' anymore. If you're not seein' Jake anymore then there is no need for me to continue being nice to him."
"I'm not seeing him anymore," Miley whispered.
"Every time anyone mentions him you flinch," Robbie Ray said, "What happened between you two?"
"I don't wanna talk about it," Miley said, "I don't wanna talk about him."
"I'm gonna tell him to stop calling," Robbie Ray said.
"Thank you," Miley said gathering up the dishes and going to wash them.
"What's with you? You've been doing housework and laundry," Robbie said only half joking, "Who are you and what have you done with my daughter?"
"I'm still me daddy," Miley said, "Since things are Hannah light lately I figured I'd try my hand a being a regular girl. Regular girls still do housework don't they?"
Robbie Ray chuckled, "I guess so."
"After I finish cleaning up after breakfast how about we go out to the batting cages," Miley said, "We haven't had time to go there in forever."
"That sounds like a plan we can find Jackson and maybe go to lunch or somethin'," Robbie Ray agreed.
"That's really great daddy," Miley went back to work on the breakfast dishes and Robbie Ray went to pretend he was watching TV while he worried about his children.
Miley's cell phone vibrated in her pocket she was scared to check it that maybe Jake had tracked down her new number, she dried her hands and checked it finding that it was a text from her best friend Nick Lucas attempting to make plans to hang out later in the day.
Nick Lucas was the kind of guy that would make anyone happy, he was amazing and in that handsome smart musician way. Miley knew she had his heart but even if she'd met him before everything happened, she was certain that they'd just be best friends. He knew the Hannah secret and related to it he was in a way famous band with his brothers and he actually encouraged her to take a break from being Hannah and focus on being Miley.
Sometimes being with Nick made things harder for her. It wasn't that she didn't like him, she knew they'd be great together. She was just more interested in her own sex. It was glaringly clear that he wanted more than friendship from her but he'd never push it and she knew he'd walk that fine line forever, and it wasn't fair to him.
She wasn't sure that she'd ever be able to let herself go enough to be in a relationship with anyone male or female, Jake had killed that in her when he held her down and took away her innocence.
She agreed to a movie night at his place in Santa Monica which was less than a half an hour drive from her home in Malibu, school would be starting for both of them soon, they went to different districts and he was busy with musical commitments and she knew they'd see very little of each other right now. They were both seniors and busy with school work and getting ready for graduation and Miley really wanted to make things work and have a normal senior year.
Maybe join the yearbook, play softball, take up smoking in the girls' room anything to put the train wreck relationship with Jake Ryan behind her. She finished the dishes and went up to shower and change out of her pajamas. She put on a pair of plain blue skinny jeans and a t-shirt with a purple hounds tooth pattern on it and slipped into socks and pair of her favorite purple Chuck Taylor's
Her long brown hair was pulled into a damp pony tail ball at the top of her head and she headed downstairs without a trace of make up. Something she hadn't done since she was much younger before the Hannah thing started and long before she met Jake. She'd put on layers and layers of make up flashy clothes to hide who she really was, now she wasn't sure if Miley was still there anymore it was no point hiding a shadow.
She spent most of the day with her father Jackson didn't come to lunch with them, he texted and said that he found a job with vendor on the beach and ate there during his interview. Miley dropped her dad off at home and went out to Nick's place.
She didn't notice that anyone was tailing her until she got there and parked on the street next to the firehouse in which the Lucas family resided and the plain black Chevy truck parked behind her. She noticed when she got out and the driver did the same and the driver was none other than Jake Ryan.
She hadn't seen him in three months, since the night both Jackson and Nick found out what he'd been doing to her for the six months of the ten months they dated. She felt the fear that had been stalking her for all this time grip her once again and she was frozen, terrified, that he would come to her here in the open.
Jake Ryan had been the perfect boyfriend in the beginning the picture of the American dream of heterosexuality a blond haired blue eyed movie star good looking Adonis made with golden dreams and bright red nightmares. He had such kind features it was hard for Miley to believe it the first time he'd hit her.
"Hey baby," Jake said coolly, "I knew you'd show up here. I just want to talk."
Miley gripped her keys in her hand she couldn't find her voice to even speak.
"I was thinking maybe we could talk," Jake said, "Maybe you'd want to have dinner with me so I could apologize I'm willing to let go of what your brother and your friend did to me. We can forget the whole thing."
Miley didn't say anything she managed to move away from her advancing ex-boyfriend she was pressed up against the driver door of her little red Mustang made in the year of her birth.
"I miss you," Jake smiled easily showing off his perfect teeth, "I know you miss me. I still dream about you about how perfect we fit together when we're lying in my bed and I'm making love to you."
Miley let out a choked sob. Jake was so close and he was touching her arm she wanted to scream she wanted to vomit. She wanted to disappear to be nothing she shut her eyes tightly.
"Miley?" Nick called from the doorway, "What's going on you're taking forever out there…"
Miley heard him trail off there he must have noticed Jake.
"What in the hell are you doing here you psycho pervert?" Nick demanded.
Miley could hear his shoes on the gravel, she tried to control her breathing, she didn't dare open her eyes she concentrated on Nick's voice and not having a panic attack. Jake released his hold on her wrist and she heard more shuffling on the gravel probably as the men were facing each other.
"I wanted to see my girlfriend," Jake said simply, "I know you tried to brainwash her. As much as you try you she will never want you not like she wants me."
"And you're an asshole," Nick said simply, "Get away from her."
"Make me," Jake said, "Jackson isn't here to fight your battles."
"I will," Nick said, "but before I kick your ass I'm going to call the cops."
"I'm out of here," Jake said, "Bye Miley."
She heard him blow her noisy kiss and then the truck cranking and starting away.
"Miley are you okay?" Nick asked.
Miley let out the breath she'd been holding since the altercation escalated she slid down the side of her car to sit on the curb.
"Miley?" Nick called she felt him pull her close and she let him.
"I'm okay," she whispered.
"You're shaking," Nick pointed out pulling away to examine her, "Did he hurt you?"
"No, not this time," Miley whispered finally daring to open her eyes and look up at Nick, "I'm fine."
He looked so concerned and despite the way he'd just spoken to Jake moments ago his tone was gentle when he spoke to her.
"Are you sure?" he asked his brown eyes sparkling with concern.
She nodded again.
"Do you want me to take you home?" Nick asked.
"No," Miley said, "I said we were gonna hang out and we are."
"If you're not feeling up to it…" Nick whispered.
"You shouldn't worry so much I'm fine really," Miley said.
He cupped her face and wiped her tears away, "Did he follow you here?"
"Yes," Miley said, "I didn't notice…"
"It's alright," Nick said, "It's a good thing you didn't. It might have been too much while you were driving."
"Let's go inside in case he comes back," Nick suggested, "I'm still calling the police."
"You can't!" Miley said, "If you do then he'll tell everything. He'll twist everythin' around and I can't have everyone know about what happened."
She knew she was almost hysterical.
"Miley," Nick said patiently, "He's completely crazy. I don't want anything to happen. I don't want the Hannah secret or anything else to come out anymore than you do. But I will do anything keep you safe."
"I know Nick but I think I'd come apart of more people knew what he did to me," Miley said.
Nick was quiet as he pulled open the red door to the firehouse and led Miley inside.
"I can either let you break and be around to pick up the pieces or sit back and watch him destroy you," Nick said, "Neither option sounds very inviting."
"Can we pretend that we've never even met Jake Ryan," Miley said, "Let's think of him as just a bad dream with a fake tan."
Nick laughed, "Okay I'm game, but what happens when we wake up?"
"I don't know but for now it's just a dream," Miley said, "It's just a dream..."
