MUST READ: This fic has some very dark moments in it. This is the first time i have ever attempted anything this dark. There is Rape and Abuse in this chapter.

If you would prefer to skip it skip al the way until the next page break.

Please review and give me our thoughts on this chapter. This is my AN for this chapter. My usual happy joking AN's have no place here in my opinion.

PS: looking for a Beta

PSS: how do i add popper page spacing like if i want a blank line between the text?

Summary: Kagome Higurashi has lived in pain and shadows for most of her life admiring the one person whom she loves. Inuyasha is completely unaware of Kagome's existence. Can Inuyasha convince Kagome that love is strong enough to defeat the greatest pain? (Rape/Abuse)


...Fear...

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In the hollow of her mind her thoughts swirled and echoed as she tried to detach herself from her body.

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...Pain...

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Muted as it was she could still feel every strike; could still smell the sake that dripped off his breath as he hovered above her.

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...Torment...

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She knew better than to struggle. The alcohol wanted a nice pliable victim. The man wanted a struggle.

Tonight was the alcohol's turn.

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...Terror...

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She didn't dare disobey.

.

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...Suffering...

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In the darkness that surrounded her she waited... It would come... it always did...

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...fear...pain...torment...terror...waiting...waiting...waiting...

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How long had she managed to hide? How much longer would it last...

She felt herself thrown from the darkness she used to protect herself. He would never let her go...

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...Never let her escape...

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Her senses returned.

Her nerves still seemed unconnected to her brain but she could feel herself laying on the hardwood floor of her home, and the awkward angle of her arm.

The smell of Alcohol rushed through her nose and the strength of it made her nauseous

The coppery taste of blood filled her mouth and chocked her.

The feelings, which had been distant in the darkness, were forced upon her full strength.

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...AGONY....

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.She shrieked at the top of her lungs.

Every nerve ending her body possessed from the neck down exploded in pain and her vision went white with the overload.

The scream echoed in the room around her, ringing in her ears only causing more pain.

Her vision still blank, she didn't see the man reach for her aching throat with his large calloused hand.

Her ears tuned in to the words she could not hear from the confines of her mind.

"SHUT UP BITCH! I TOLD YOU TO NEVER MAKE A SOUND! NO ONE WANTS A WOMAN WITH A VOICE!"

The sudden increase in pressure on her windpipe blurred her slowly returning vision as tears of pain gathered in her eyes. She forced herself not to struggle as he picked her up single handedly by the through and dragged her body up against the wall.

He stepped close so that his face was only inches from her own before whispering, "Good... much better... a woman should know her place."

Her hope for unconsciousness vanished as she slowly felt him loosen his grip on her windpipe. " Good, good. We can't have you passing out from lack of oxygen can we... after all... there's still so much more fun to be had tonight..." Still blind she nearly flinched when whispering he laughed nearly silently before burying his face almost gently into the crook of her neck.

She knew what would come next. She abhorred what she knew would follow this seemingly tender act. She hated when he was tender about it. She preferred the rough treatment it seemed she wouldn't receive. At least when he was rough there was no pleasure to speak of. She preferred the pain of black and blue bruises to the feeling of dirt across her skin.

"I think..." He began; his voice breathy in her ear as he stepped foreword to hold her body against the wall with his own, releasing his grip on her throat in favor of resting it on her hip.

" It's been a while since we went over the rules hasn't it."

The only movement in the room was his hand sliding slowly up her side then down to her thigh before warping itself around her waist. His other hand, which had remained in a fist at his side as he spoke, slowly crept down to grab her ankle before sliding up her leg and wrapping it around his own waist.

Afraid and silent, she was determined to remain staring over the man's head at the opposite wall. She remained still with tears dripping down her face as his adventurous hands wrapped her other leg around his waist and placed her arms around his neck.

She could feel him press himself against her and nip and bite at the junction of her neck and shoulder. "You like this don't you..." he sighed between kisses and nips "My good little girl never puts up a fight..."

She tried to ignore the thing poking at her where her kegs wrapped around him but stiffened when it twitched against her as his hands began to dance across her chest and as he placed hot open-mouthed kisses along her collar bone.

When he felt her stiffen against him he stopped all movement his fury spiking suddenly.

Grabbing her arm he stepped back and threw her into the wall above her bed quite pleased with the resounding thud and the blood that dripped down the wall from the cut in her head.

Desperately she tried to escape back into her mind. It was the only available option. she couldn't move her body and the bleeding from her head only seemed to sharpen her senses instead of dulling them.

She watched as fury blazed in her father's brown eyes; his hair matted and his face and suit splattered with her blood. His gaze burned her as it reached unimaginable highest. The swirl of fury, and lust gave him a crazed look as her took long menacing strides toward her still unmoving body.

"HOW DARE YOU, YOU FILTHY WHORE, FLINCH AS I OFFER YOU PLEASURE!"

'Move! Move! MOVE!' her paralyzed body whirled and strained as she tried to move, to escape, to do ANYTHING! but her efforts were in vain as her father reached her and slammed her below him on the bed. Climbing on top of her he grabbed her arms, which were already blue and green, and yanked them up above her head, nearly pulling them out of their sockets. Removing his tie he used it to bind her to the bedpost.

He roughly shoved his tongue into her mouth and practically down her throat. She dared not bite down. Still kissing her roughly he shrugged himself out of his jacket and ripped off his buttoned shirt before moving his hands to her body.

Nothing worked. Her body had shut down yet she was still forced to feel it all. She could feel as he ripped open her pajama tank top and began roughly fondling her breasts through her bra. She felt as one hand reached around to undo the hook keeping him from his prize while the other explored the expanse of her stomach.

As soon as the clasp was undone her slid the bra up her bound arms before sitting up on her legs. She squirmed in discomfort as she felt him harden while staring at her exposed chest before her hoarse throat attempted to cry out when he latched him mouth on one mound and bit down hard. She felt him suckling the blood from her breast as if her were a newborn taking milk from it's mother.

No coherent thoughts passed through her mind when the pain threw her back into the darkness she wished was unconsciousness. Screeching in her head were the screams and shrieks of pain that her throat refused to release. Echoing in her mind were the only truths she knew.

.

WHORE

SLUT

BITCH

MURDERER

UNGRATEFUL

USELESS

SELFISH

WASTE

.

.

.

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PAIN

FEAR

TORTURE

TORMENT

.

.

.

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and through it all she could still feel as he thrust harshly in and out of her bleeding passage..

...she could still feel the pain where his nails raked into her skin hard enough to draw blood...

...she wished for the escape that unconsciousness could provide...

.

and still could she feel these things long after her father had spent himself many times within her before walking out her room and heading to his master suite to sleep.

.

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...trapped... alone... afraid...

.

.

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'...help me...'


It was about 4 o'clock in the morning when the screams faded in her mind.

It was over for now.

This wouldn't happen again for a few days if she were lucky.

As the young girl lay sprawled in her own blood, sweat and tears, unmoving, only one think kept her from giving in to the death she would otherwise have allowed herself.

.

Him.

.

He was her light. Her guilty pleasure. The only thing she had left to live for. If she died, how would she ever see him again? How would she ever watch as he lived the life and received the happiness he deserved?

She knew that it was selfish of her to want him happy; and she knew it was selfish to want to stay alive and witness his happiness.

.

But still.

.

He was the last thing Kagome thought of before allowing herself the fleeting escape of unconsciousness.