This is my second fic, but on a different user. My damn friend found my account. I know right, awks if I write a lemon. Now I have to start my "fan base" again :,(
But no matter! We must persevere.
"Bella, you came!" Jake ran over to the paleface walking down the beach, approaching the bonfire.
Why does he even try? He has no chance, and if she did find that she wants him, she would never drop her family of bloodsuckers for him, for anyone. What's gonna happen when he finds his imprint? The same thing that happened to Sam. Fucking bastard!
I don't know where he finds his hope because all I see is his suffering, every time she's too busy to see him, every time she mentions her vamp of a boyfriend, every time she lifts his hopes when she returns his embraces and caring smiles, only to turn around and go back to her 'family'.
"Hey Jake" and there it is again, the lilt in her voice. Can two people be so selfish? Can those two people really value pain like this?
"Leah calm down" Paul hissed from my left.
"I'm not going to calm down, Paul so shut your face" I stood up and walked over an empty bench. I looked over at him and send my apology through my eyes. He accepted it with a nod and I turned away from him. He didn't deserve my ire. He was one of the very few as I heard the sighs of annoyance or irritancy from my pack-mates.
No one understands. I know in my mind that's not true, the pack know how I feel and why I feel this way, but they don't know how all the emotions built up and how that feels. In my heart, I know they can never truly understand because I never let them get that far.
"What's up with her?" my head snapped in the direction of the hushed whisper. She lowered her eyes, but that didn't keep me from seeing the brown orbs lock onto my own for that fleeting moment.
In that painful, miraculous instant, everything fell apart. I had nothing. Then I had her. That's all that I can say to express how I felt in that moment.
Shit.
I lifted myself off of the bench stiffly and started the trek home, my chest bubbling with longing and conflict.
"Leah, you can't leave now"
"Sam, I really can't stay, and you really can't make me." I never deviated from my path until a large hand gripped my shoulder lightly, but firmly enough to spin me around to look him in the eye. "Go ahead, use that alpha command." I dared him "Tell me to stay. Tell me to not be such a sour bitch. Tell me to be a part of this pack, because before any of this supernatural shit happened, I would have done anything you asked of me." My voice was low, deadly.
Sam released my shoulder and gave me that sorrowful look he's been giving me for years now. "Leah, are you alright?" He immediately backtracked, "I mean, I thought we were better now"
I ran my hand through my hair and released a long sigh. "I'm… sorry, we are, I'm trying, but you know it will never be fixed. It's broken" I'm broken. I couldn't say that though he must know it.
"What happened with Bella over there?"
I shook my head. "Not now. I need to go home"
"Do you want me to take you off patrol for a while?" Sam asked softly.
"I'd say no, but then I would just be punishing the boys now wouldn't I?" I turned around and kept walking, but then sighed again. "Just give me two weeks."
"Anything you need"
###########
couple days later on the phone
"Swan." I can't believe I'm doing this. I don't even know what I'm saying.
"Um, who is this?" Idiot.
"It's Leah"
"Oh. Why-uh, what do you need?" good question.
"I…require…some… assistance. Yes, I need your help to... write a paper on stuff that you know" smooth.
"Um, like what?"
"Uh. Well you're… a girl and..." this is pathetic. I've got nothing.
"Oh. You want to talk about… girl stuff?"
"Sure. Come over to my house tomorrow. I'm here all day. That's okay right?"
"I guess, but-"
"Great, see ya then."
I wiped my forehead with my arm and took breath. That was smooth, Leah. You're so not anti-social or weird. Bella has no reason to think otherwise.
Eh, could've been worse. I shrugged it off and then flopped onto the couch for a nap.
The next day was a Saturday and I was on the couch again, but I was watching TV when Bella knocked on the door. I pulled myself up and opened the door. Bella was there. Her hair was casually tucked behind her ears and she was wearing jeans and a green button down shirt. She smiled, but I could tell she was nervous. "Hi" She offered a small wave.
"Hi" I had my hand holding the doorframe and the other on the handle.
"So, um." She looked around awkwardly for a moment, "Are we going inside?"
"No" I stepped forward and pulled the door closed behind me. "Let's take a walk, Bella"
She frowned, but followed my lead towards the forest. "Sure, I guess"
We walked in silence until we got about 6 feet into the tree-line.
"Are you taking me out here to kill me?" She asked playfully, but it wasn't as light as I'd heard her speak in Jacob's thoughts.
"No"
"Okay" a few minutes later, she spoke up again, "Why did you ask me here, Leah?"
My eyes flashed to hers and she instinctively took a step back. "Can't two people just walk in the forest in silence? Is that so weird to think, Swan? Am I so weird to think this is normal when it isn't? Oh, but of course, I'm a freak" I slapped my forehead with my palm, "How could I forget. I suppose no one reminded me enough." I said bitterly.
Bella looked at me with eyes like a deer caught in headlights, but then she turned forward again and kept walking, and we fell back in step. We didn't talk again. We didn't talk when the sun could pass through the canopy. We didn't talk when the leaf litter became gravel and then rock. We didn't talk when we sat on the cliff edge, dangling our legs over the rocky waters. We didn't talk until we made it back to the edge of the forest when Bella cleared her throat to get my attention, not that she hadn't already had it. "Are we going to be doing this again?"
"Why would you want to?" I frowned
She just shrugged her shoulders, "It was nice. Silence is nice sometimes. Gives us time to think"
"Next week" I nodded sharply.
She nodded her head and then we parted ways, her to her truck and me back to my door.
Will admit, I'm not too sure where this is going, but for now it's just going one chapter at a time.
u guys got any ideas for old Midna over here? (No, my name's not Midna)
I would like to keep this going.
Ma fav Twilight pairings:
- Bella/Rosalie
- Victoria/Bella
- Rosalie/Victoria
- Bella/any or all Denali sisters
- Bella/Leah
I don't want to abandon it, but if I don't get some direction, I can't write it.
