Baldi Tries To Teach Math

| Characters: Baldi, Slenderman, Golden, Herobrine, Mario & Sonic|

( This Is Just A Funny Short Story )

It is a beautiful summer day & Baldi was standing in the main entrance, waiting for his students to show up. A bit confused, he checked his time then hears talking. Baldi fixed his long sleeve shirt then the doors open. Baldi: "Oh! Hai! & welcome to my school… house…" Mario: "Sup bitch" Sonic: "Mario! He's the teacher… I think" Mario: "U mean this tooth pick mother fuker is the teacher?" Baldi hand on his face & shock his head & realized it's gonna be a long day.

Baldi lead his students to the class room, Baldi: "You all can choose your seats" Golden: "Aw shit dawg! This is gonna be lite! Slender! Do u want to sit next to me?" Slender: "Fuk no" Baldi: "Okie students let's calm down on the swearing, we r in a school" Golden: "This is a school?" Slender: "Naw bitch, this is Big Lots" Golden: "This is the shitty's store eva, were r the tools?" Herobrine: "U dumbass" Baldi: "can everyone please choose a seat, so we can start" Mario: "Just start it nigga" Sonic: "Just sit-down Mario before u get detention" Mario: "I'm already half way there" Baldi breathes heavily as everyone chooses their seats.

Baldi: "Okie everyone, my name Baldi Basics & Welcome to my school, before we start, were gonna introduce each other. Let's start with u in the light blue shirt, stand up & tell us your name" Herobrine stands up & faces the whole class. Herobrine: "My name is Herobrine & I literally build shit outta nothing" Hero sat back down while Baldi stood there confused but he pressed on to the next student. Slender: "Hai my name is Slender & I live in a forest that I had to regrow cuz somebody want to light up my forest like a damn Christmas tree" Slender gave a mad look at Golden but he gave him a great big smile, Baldi look at Slender but before he could ask Slender anything Golden stood up from his chair & spoke, Golden: "Sup newbs! My name is Golden Freddy, but u can call me Golden & I like to drink alcohol & smoke deem drugs, pop pills like candy & hang with my BFF, Marty Mc Fly!" Golden sat back down with a big smile on his face like he completed a mission while Baldi was shocked at what Golden said, as Baldi was trying to gather his thoughts about Golden, Sonic stands up. Sonic: "Hey guys, my name is Sonic & I run fast as Fuk" Sonic sat back down as Mario stood up, Baldi: "Have mercy" Baldi whispered to himself, Mario: "Sup bitches! my name is Mario & I like to scare the shit out of Bowser & pretend that I don't have a brother that is against me" Mario sat down, Baldi looked at everyone like he knew he made a big mistake but non the less, he clears his throat & turned to the board.

Baldi: "Now is time for everybody's favorite subject… math!" Golden: "Yes! We get to learn about meth!" Herobrine: "U Ass, he said math not meth, dumbass" Bald: "yeah… Um… * breaths * What's 6 – 8?" Golden: "1 Funnel Cake" Baldi: "That's not the answer I'm looking for" Mario: "The answer is 99 problems & a bitch ain't one" Baldi: "A real answer" Slender: "-2" Baldi: "Oh thank god a real answer" Slender: "What?" Baldi: "U got it right" Baldi: "What is 1 + 2?" Herobrine: "3!" Baldi: "Correct!" Mario: "Baldi!" Baldi looked at Mario, Mario: "What's 5 – 5?" Baldi: "0…" Mario: "That's how many bitches u have" Sonic facepalmed, Baldi: "Okay… obviously this ain't working… hmm. Oh, I know how about some words problems!" Slender: "Can't we just expel Mario" Mario: "Slender he can't do shit to me" Baldi: "& Y is that?" Mario: "Mother Fuker school is out!" Slender: "Mario it's called a summer school for a reason" Mario: "Fuk up u thin ass white twig, I'll expel myself" Sonic: "Please do" Baldi: "Now hold your horses Mario, let's not make any rash decisions" Golden: "When do we get the free food?" Herobrine: "Golden there is no food cuz summer school only takes up half the day" Golden: "It's a good thing I brought my pudding cup" Baldi: "There's no eating or drinking in class" Mario pulled a Monster out his hat, opened it & started drinking it. Golden: "Oooooohhhhh! Savage!" Slender: "Mario, He just said no foods or drinks" Mario: "I don't give a fuk" Baldi: "Please make this day end…" Golden: "Is class over yet?" Baldi: "Let's just do the damn word problems" Baldi pulls a book out of his desk & opened it, Baldi: "Josh wants to buy a TV that costs $2,380 & a printer that costs $259." Golden: "Y but a printer when u can get bleach" Herobrine: "Golden Bleach has nothing to do with computers" Baldi gives a Skeptical look then continued reading. Baldi: "How much money does he need to pay?" Mario: "Y doesn't he just break in the mother fuking store & take the shit?" Slender: "That would make Josh a criminal" Baldi: "Just Give Me A Answer!" Herobrine: "I think it would be 2,559" Golden: "Naw bitch it's 500 pounds of cocaine" Baldi: "Golden… this person in the book isn't a drug dealer" Golden: "Wait… Josh ain't black?" Baldi: "Okay next question, Nick wants to buy a laptop" Mario: "But Nick is a broke nigga" Baldi slams the book close. Baldi: "Forget the book… let's try something else"

Baldi tried to think of something that Golden & Mario can understand, Baldi: "I know let's count money" Baldi pulled out some fake money. Baldi: "Sonic, whut does 3 dimes add up to?" Sonic: "30 cents" Baldi: "Right! Mario, whut do u get when u add a dollar & 50 cent?" Mario: "Easy! U buy something from Taco Bell" Baldi threw the fake money in the air & sat in chair. Baldi: * impatient breathing * "Mario… if I had one dollar & I add it to 2 more dollars, how many dollars will I have?" Mario: "Depends how fast u can get broke" Baldi: "I'm Done!" Baldi grabbed his stuff, Baldi: "Class diss miss" Baldi said as he leaves the class room. Sonic: "Great job asshole, u broke our teacher" Mario: "Man, that noodle arm mother fuker ain't no teacher" every got up from the chairs & left the school. Herobrine: "Fantastic now we can't do shit cuz of u two!" Golden: "I learned something" Slender: "Golden, u didn't learn shit" Golden: "Yeah I did, it was how to make a teacher snap like a twig" Herobrine: "Bruh, Mario just tough u how to be an ass to a teacher" Golden: "I know, cool right" Mario: "See Sonic, I am a teacher" Sonic walked away, regretting that he brought Mario with him

The End