Author's Disclaimer and Note: Avatar: The Last Airbender is not mine. It belongs to Nick sadly enough and all rights theirs. This is a fan fiction and not to be considered cannon. Spoiler warning Zuko Alone.

Warnings: Angst

A Mother's Thoughts

by

Ragemoon

I come tonight in the darkness. I study every line of him in te pale light of the candle's burning low in his room. They cast odd shadows on his face. I swear I saw what looked to be a scar over his left eye I blink and my vision clears. His face once more looks whole to me. I sigh inwardly looking at him committing him to my memory.

He wakes upon feeling me there beside him in his room. We speak for a moment then I leave him there, my son in his warm bed. He watches confused at my strange good-bye even though my leaving him there like I always do. I know he sees the sadness in my eyes and is confused by it being there. I wish I could tell him why but I cannot time is short for me now. He does not realize that I go in order to save his life. He will not ever know this till he is much older and can put the pieces of this night together in his memory. I will not have my Little Fire die, he is my pride and joy. He bears so much hope and promise as the future Fire Lord. I hope that he will rule well. I wish I could see him though to that day but alas that is not my fate this night. I don't like leaving him to them, so cold and uncaring.

The only members of this family that loves him truly is myself and his Uncle Iroh. I hope Iroh gets my message. I hope he will understand what it is I am doing here. He who lost his son too soon himself. He will understand what it is I am doing. I pray that he will guard my little fire the Dragon of the West like he would have guarded his own son. I hope that Zuko will understand what I am doing when he gets older.

I stride down the halls my hood drawn around my face. My foot steps hollow ringing along the stones as walk sounding like the death drums when we morn for our dead. I think on my children and how different they are, polar opposites. Zuko my first born future Fire Lord he has compassion, love and hope that live within him. I hope that they never get broken. He has this thirst, this hunger to do his best and give his best always. He never gives up and that will make him stronger then they all will realize. I love him so much for that. I just wish his Father felt the same.

But no, he loves our daughter Azula more. For she is just like him. Cold, unfeeling and thinks she is better then everyone and that all people should bow before her. That is wrong and I don't like it but I cannot change it. I tried and failed so I concerned myself with the one I could mold and give a secret strength too. One that he would not realize is his until he gets much older. I hope that he will learn to lean on that strength at his darkest times when he truly needs it.

I am sad to leave my son to the wolves. But I rather leave him to the wolves then visit his grave. So I choose to exchange my life for his. He is more important to me then myself and it has always been so. I love you Little Zuko. Grow up well my Little Fire I will always watch over you.